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Flashes of cruel words come back to me, hitting me with a new force while my past plays in front of me like a colorful movie, a horror that’s impossible to look at.
I whimper, palming my head, and my rocking becomes more violent. The guys turn their attention to me and watch me while I desperately try to put together all the pieces in my head to present the full picture. To explain to myself what’s going on.
Why is my arm aching?
Why is blood smeared all over me?
Why is everyone so worried about me—even Santiago, who usually avoids us anyway?
Clearing his throat, Santiago orders Antonio, “Delete all the footage from the camera right now.” He nods, ready to bolt, but Santiago’s words stop him. “If you ever speak to anyone about what happened tonight, you will be guilty too. Keep that in mind.” He nods again and darts away while Santiago faces us. “Any ideas on how to handle this? Think fast. At this point, we’ll all be guilty of the crime. Our lawyers won’t be able to help us.”
“We need to hide the body,” Florian says, rubbing his face.
Remi sighs. “There’s blood everywhere, his DNA and fingerprints. We can’t just hide it. They’ll search for it; he’s one of the richest guys in the country. Besides, how do you plan to get rid of it anyway?”
What are they all even talking about? Lawyers, DNA, getting rid of the body? Are we in a thriller?
“I don’t know, Remi. What am I? A serial killer on the fucking hunt?” Florian spits. They stare at one another in anger, then look at Santiago when he snaps his fingers, holding our attention.
“Serial killer. We have one in the country right now, right?”
“Right. They mentioned it on the news. What does he…? He might be the cover we need.”
The Church Killer. He’s been all over the news, and recently, he destroyed a wedding in Chicago, leaving only headless bodies in his wake. He has no style. He does whatever he wants, but his actions are always hideous and deadly.
What did I do?
It’s as if finally the light bulb turns on in my head, casting light on the darkness that my mind desperately wished to hide from me. My actions register in my mind, and horrible sensations envelop me while bile rises in my throat.
No.
I killed him.
I took a life!
“Florian.” He rushes to me and lands on his knees, mindful of not getting in the blood, and places his hands on my shoulders. “What have I done, Florian?” How could I have allowed it to get this far? I didn’t even understand my actions until it was too late. My single focus was to destroy the man promising hell for my sister. “What have I done?” I shake my head. “I killed him. Fuck, I killed him.” Tears form in my eyes because my little princess… “Estella. She’ll be all alone.”
“No, we have a plan.”
Are they all insane? There can never be a plan after someone commits a crime. It’s a sin and inhuman to take a life, and I deserve to be punished.
Yes, he abused me.
Yes, he was horrible to me.
Yes, he killed my father.
But no one gave me the right to kill anyone.
“No!” I shout, slamming my fist against my chest. “My fault. I did it. Get out. Get out, all of you. I’ll call the cops and turn myself in. Just promise to take care of Estella,” I beg Florian. “Please.” If my best friend gives me his word, I’ll rot in prison in peace, knowing he would never ever allow anyone to harm her.
Especially my mother and whatever new fucking man she finds to fix her financial problems.
Florian squeezes me harder, his voice turning deadly. “I’ll do anything for you, man, but not this. We’ll find a way.”
“There is no fucking way! I’m a murderer! Get out!” After my sister, I love them the most, and I’ll be damned if any one of them is hurt due to my mistakes.
A man is defined by his honor. This I know for sure.
