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“Yeah, but I’m still worried.”
“Physically, he’ll heal, but the scars will be there. Seen and unseen.”
“How does… how does someone come back from…” I struggled to say the words out loud. “How does someone come back from that?”
“How are you handling it, Genevieve?” Killian asked instead. How was I handling it? I couldn’t sleep. Every time I closed my eyes I could hear Nolan screaming. Or I could hear her voice.
“What did Gabby say?” I replied, knowing full well my sister had talked.
“She said you won’t take the medicine the doctor gave you to help you sleep. And when you do sleep, you wake up screaming or crying. Declan told me about the panic attack in the hospital, and Gabby told me you’ve been anxious but trying to hide it from her.”
“I hear him whenever I fall asleep.” A sob caught in my throat, and his arm tightened around me. “I thought he was going to… and I couldn’t do anything. Maybe if I’d…”
Maybe if I’d… what? What could I have done differently?
“There wasn’t a damn thing you could’ve done, baby girl,” Killian assured me. “Not against someone like her.”
“Can you teach me to be like you?” The silence that greeted me was discouraging. Despite the pain in my shoulder, I rotated enough to stare up at him. “You said you trust no one with my life.”
“I take that back. I trust Nolan.” Oh, my heart. “Why do you want to learn to fight, baby girl?”
“Because you won’t always be there,” I told him, guilty over the pained expression the statement put on his face. “And what if something like this happens again?”
“It won’t happen again, Genevieve.”
“You can’t promise that!” I exclaimed with a rise of panic in my voice. “What if it does? What if I’m alone? What am I supposed to do? Or what if you can’t find me?”
The words jumbled together as they fell out of my mouth. My chest heaved and constricted, making breathing difficult. Killian cupped my cheek and pressed his forehead to mine.
“Breathe for me, baby girl,” he whispered while I sucked in air desperately and blinked back tears. “I’ll teach you how to protect yourself and then some, okay? You won’t need a fucking person in the world to keep you safe by the time I’m done with you, I promise. Okay?”
“Okay.” I nodded. “Okay. I’m okay. I’m okay.”
“No, you’re not,” he said. “But that’s okay. You don’t have to be, Genevieve.”
He was right. I wasn’t okay. I was far from it and didn’t know what to do.
“Distract me? Please?” I pleaded. Something to distract from all the little thoughts threatening to take over again.
“What did the doctor say?” Killian asked. “About the baby? Declan said everything was okay, but I wasn’t sure what he knew. I didn’t know what to ask.”
“Grab that,” I replied, waving my good arm at the night table beside him. “Envelope. Open the envelope.”
He grabbed the envelope and opened it, taking out the ultrasound the doctor had done. I hadn’t wanted it, but he’d insisted. There was one major detail that was easier for Killian to just see rather than me telling him.
Also, watching the look on his face as he stared at it was personal entertainment.
“Genevieve,” he began slowly, and I smiled, “there’s two.”
“Yes,” I replied.
“Two babies,” he repeated.
“Yes.”
“There’s two in there.” Oh, good Lord this man. “That’s four hands.”
“Yes.”
