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“I have to ask her dad. I just started working for him.” People think I’m hired help and not the center of his world. And playing this game doesn’t sit well with me.
“I have his number,” the woman chirps. “I can call him.”
I cock my head, wondering how she has Darragh’s number.
“No thanks. I’ll do it.” But I don’t have a phone. “When I get back to the house. I…lost my phone.”
“Oh, you need a new one right away. If the bus is running late, you get a notification.” She shows me her home screen. “See, they’re running five minutes late.”
“That’s handy. I’ll be getting a new one soon.” I take a breath. “It’s kind of freeing, you know. No phone.”
“You are so right about that. Let me call Darragh. Avery doesn’t have any activities this afternoon. I’m sure you’d love to curl up and take a nap on a day like today.”
Are women really this nice? I grew up with murderers.
“Dr. O’Rourke? It’s Lucy Smith. Avery’s mom. Hi!” She pours it on. “I’m with your new nanny at the bus stop. And we wanted to ask you if Sophie can come home with Avery for a few hours.”
I watch the woman’s face, certain that Darragh is making some kind of excuse why Sophie can’t go. He’s been even more protective of us after what happened.
But Darragh wants his daughter to have a normal childhood, too. Something we were both deprived of.
“Great. Here she is.” Lucy hands me the phone. “He wants to speak to you.”
“Hi.” I try to sound like a cheery nanny who is happy to get a few more hours off.
“You okay?” Darragh’s serious voice suggests he’s worried about me.
“Um, yeah.”
“You got ambushed, huh?” His tone relaxes me.
“That, and I don’t have a phone so I couldn’t call you.” Emotion makes my voice squeak.
“Fuck, we’ll get you a phone this weekend.” He clears his throat over the muffled sounds of a crowd in the background. “I know Lucy. Sophie’s been to Avery’s house for parties. If you’re okay with it, I’m okay with it.”
I’m ashamed to admit how absolutely terrified I am to stay in the house alone and that I’ve been dying for Sophie to come home and ease this irrational fear. Cormac is nearby, I feel it. Like he’s waiting for another chance to abduct me again. Or kill me.
But I can’t live being afraid all the time. Darragh knows better. He’s thinking more clearly right now.
“I’m okay with it, only if you are.” I have to trust him. “Oh, the bus is coming now. I’ll call you from the house phone when I get home.”
He left his cell phone number on the legal pad.
“Sounds good. I miss you.” His words make my heart pound.
I know he means physically, too.
“Me, too,” I squeak as warm tears fill my eyes.
The emotions that come with pregnancy were stifled all these months from my need for survival. Now, they’re killing me.
“I’ll talk to you in a few.” He ends the call.
The bus lumbers up, and kids spill out.
A dark-haired girl runs up to Lucy and starts chucking things at her, a school bag, lunch bag, and jacket, like her mother is that poor abused assistant in the movie The Devil Wears Prada.
I wonder if this kid is someone I want Sophie hanging out with.
