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Bad luck charm, bad luck charm, bad luck charm.
The label I’d given myself after the death of the moms, Aurelia’s accident that left her in a wheelchair, Brynn’s memory loss when I was supposed to be looking at her… and now? With Artie lying motionless in the hospital bed and someone I loved verbalizing it?
It must have been true.
Avoiding Enzo’s outstretched hands, I whirled on my heel and ran out of the hospital room, bile crawling up my throat as I made it down the hallway just in time to find a trashcan to throw up in.
“Mo ròs.” Cool hands cupped the back of my neck as Leith gathered my hair, which I’d left floating freely around my head for our routine, away from my face.
“Don’t call me that,” I gasped, spitting what used to be the bagel that I’d forced myself to eat this morning into the trashcan. “Not right now.”
I didn’t want him to call me soft platitudes. I wasn’t his rose right now, I was the reason our omega was lying in a hospital bed.
Straightening, I found Leith’s face full of worry and pity. It made me want to scream at him, to beat my fists against his chest until he got angry at me the way Enzo was.
But Leith would never get angry at me. It wasn’t built into his DNA and trying would only make me feel worse.
“Enzo didn’t mean any of what he said back there,” Leith reached for me but I skittered away from him, afraid that if I let him soothe me that I would walk back into that hospital room and pretend like Enzo’s words hadn’t flayed me raw. “He’s panicked and—”
I cut him off. “I know, Lei, but I need some time away from all of this. I’m gonna head back to the apartment and sleep.”
“I can go with you, I’m worried about you.” Leith’s green eyes were intent on my face and I could feel him prodding at the edges of my mental blockade, trying to gauge my mental state, but I didn’t let him in.
“I’m fine, you stay with Artie. That’ll make me feel better than anything. I’ll be at the apartment, call me when he wakes up?”
The lie rolled too smoothly off of my tongue.
Leith looked as if he wanted to stop me, but his wide shoulders finally sank in surrender. “All right, but text me when you get there?”
I nodded, offering him a weak smile and accepting the forehead kiss that made me want to sob.
Turning, I walked away from him. Every step I took away from him broke me a little bit more, but I had things I needed to do.
And to do them, I needed to go back to where everything started.
I needed to go back to Ireland.
Chapter thirty-seven
My breath was a ragged gasp by the time I made it to Artie’s hospital room, my heart in my throat as I took in the three men inside.
Alexei and Maxim had yanked me off of the ice during the third period, their expressions grave as they filled me in on what had happened during Ciara and Artie’s set.
I’d taken to shutting off my end of the bond while I was playing—to keep from getting distracted—but as soon as the coaches told me that something was wrong I opened it back up and nearly buckled at the level of emotions that were flowing from my packmates.
Ciara’s end of the bond was completely dark and so was Artie’s, but Leith’s and Enzo’s were so palpable that I could almost taste their fear on my tongue as I changed into my regular clothes and made my way to the hospital.
One of the benefits of being a fully bonded pack member meant that I was in Artie’s charts now and they let me right through, sending me to the fourth floor where the omega was currently being held for observations.
“How is he?” I asked as I stepped inside, glancing around for Ciara and not finding her anywhere in the small room. “And where’s Ciara?”
Guilt trickled down the bond from Enzo’s direction and he looked anywhere but at me.
“I’m fine,” Artie called from the bed where he was currently batting Leith’s hands away from him as the alpha tried to fuss. “And Ciara isn’t here because this idiot decided it would be a good idea to lash out at her.”
“Babe…” Enzo began, looking miserable.
Artie didn’t even turn his face toward the other alpha, crossing his arms over his chest. “Don’t babe me. Go fix it.”
