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Tessa hesitates for a moment, then leans in closer. "It's just... I saw Simon earlier. He seemed stressed, like something was bothering him. I tried to ask, but he just brushed it off."
I frown, a prickle of unease running down my spine. Simon, my manager, is usually the picture of unflappable professionalism. If something's got him rattled, it must be serious.
"I'll talk to him," I assure Tessa, squeezing her shoulder. "Whatever it is, we'll handle it."
Tessa nods, a grateful smile tugging at her lips. "I know you will. You always do."
As we make our way towards my dressing room, I can't shake the feeling that something's brewing just beneath the surface. But for now, I push it aside, focusing on the rush of the performance and the warmth of Tessa's presence beside me.
In the sanctuary of my dressing room, I sink into the plush chair in front of the mirror, staring at my reflection. The woman staring back at me is a stark contrast to the one who was on stage just moments ago.
I lean closer to the mirror, studying the lines of my face, the shadows beneath my eyes. "Who are you, really?" I whisper to my reflection. "The untouchable pop star or the scared girl hiding behind the glitz?"
It's a question I've been grappling with more and more lately as the pressure of fame and constant scrutiny threaten to suffocate me. I think back to the early days, when it was just me and my music, a dream and a passion that consumed me.
"Remember why you started this, Sasha," I tell myself firmly. "Remember the joy, the love, the connection. That's what matters. Not the fame, not the expectations. Just the music."
The woman on stage is a force to be reckoned with, a beacon of strength and confidence. But the woman off stage, the one staring back at me in the mirror, is just... me. A woman with fears and insecurities, with a constant worry lurking in the back of her mind.
The shift from the public adoration to private concern is rapid, almost jarring. I can feel the weight of my stage makeup, the heaviness of my false lashes, the constriction of my sequined costume. It's as if they're physical manifestations of the persona I've left behind on stage, a stark reminder of the dichotomy of my life.
I can't help but reflect on the journey that led me here. The countless hours of practice, the sacrifices, the dreams, the fears. I've come so far and achieved so much, and yet, there's a part of me that's still scared, still unsure. There's a part of me that yearns for the simplicity of the life I left behind and the anonymity and freedom that came with it.
But then I look at my reflection again, at the woman who's made it through countless performances, triumphs, and failures. I see the strength in her eyes, the resilience, the determination. And I realize I am that woman. I am strong; I am resilient; I am determined.
The curvy fullness of my body, once a source of insecurity, now fuels my passion for change. With my platform as a successful musician, I dream of launching a body positivity campaign, to inspire others to embrace their unique beauty and challenge society's narrow standards. My journey towards self-acceptance has been a battle, but it's one I want to fight—for myself and all the other girls out there who are struggling with not fitting into society’s definition of beautiful.
"Can you imagine the impact this could have, Tessa?" I had asked her when I told her, my voice trembling with excitement. "All those girls out there, struggling with the same doubts and insecurities I did... What if we could show them that they're beautiful just as they are?"
Tessa's eyes widened, a slow smile spreading across her face. "Sasha, that's incredible. You could change so many lives with this."
I nodded, my heart swelling with purpose. "I want to use my platform for something meaningful, something that matters. This campaign... it's not just about me anymore. It's about every person who's ever felt like they weren't enough."
I envisioned a world where every person feels empowered in their own skin, where labels and judgments hold no power. I wanted my music to be a catalyst for this change, to give voice to the struggles and triumphs of those who have felt unseen. With each note, each lyric, I've poured my heart into this mission, sharing my own story to encourage others to write their own.
It’s more than just a dream; it's a calling. And I'm ready to answer it with every fiber of my being.
As I look at my reflection, I make a promise to myself. A promise to never lose sight of who I am or what I stand for. A promise to always stay true to myself, to my dreams, and to my beliefs. A promise to always be me, no matter what.
I flop onto the couch in my dressing room, kicking off my heels, and Tessa shoots me a look of concern, but I wave her off with a reassuring smile.
"You sure you're okay?” she asks. “You look a little pale."
"I'm good, just need to catch my breath."
She nods and busies herself organizing the racks of clothes while I grab my phone, ready to scroll through the usual flood of post-show messages and tag myself in a few fan pics. But as my thumb swipes across the screen, a notification catches my eye—a new message from an unknown number.
A chill runs down my spine as I stare at the screen, my pulse quickening. "What the hell?" I mutter under my breath.
My brow furrows as I tap it open, and the words that greet me feel like a bucket of ice water has been dumped over my head.
unknown
You think you're so hot, don't you, with your curves and your little pop songs? We'll see how confident you are when I'm done with you.
The phone clatters from my trembling hands, the screen shattering against the dressing room floor. I can barely breathe, my heart jackhammering as a cold sweat prickles my skin.
Fuck. Not again.
