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“It’s always interesting to do things with new people, innit. People always do things in ways you can’t predict — until you see it.” Even as I say it, I see exactly the double meaning my words could have if they were applied to our relationship, such as it is.
All of a sudden I get the overwhelming urge to reach out and take her hand. I sit on mine instead to try and calm the desire. I know she doesn’t want this to be anything except what it is, and I thought I didn’t either. I don’t need a relationship. I’m a free agent.
But as I turn to look at her, I'm seeing the way the sun reflects off her round face, the soft curve of her lips as she smiles, the expressive motion of her eyes when she speaks. Like a brick, it hits me that if I could watch that face every day for the rest of my life, I’d be happy. And soon enough, I'm going to have to let her go.
I think that thought might be breaking my heart.
“Miles? I said, have you enjoyed playing with these guys?” Olivia waves her hand at me, snapping me out of my daydreams.
“Yeah,” I reply because that seems like the right thing to say.
“You’re in a weird mood today,” she says as we turn down the drive to my apartment. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
“Yeah. I must just be tired. Sorry.”
The car grinds to a halt in my parking spot, and I hook my fingers around the handle, hesitating. “You coming up?”
“You want me to?”
Those brown eyes are going to be the death of me. They’re so dark, so deep, so entrancing. Does she know what she’s doing to me when she looks at me like this?
I lean over to her to pull her into a kiss, letting our lips meet hungrily, our hands entwining as it deepens, everything in the world coming down to the pinpoint of this moment. Even as we pull away, we linger, our eyes shut and faces hovering close for a second longer than they really need to.
“Of course,” I say, and mean it.
She glances at her watch. “Okay, you’ve got me for an hour.”
“I’ll make it worth your while,” I grin and mean every part of it.
It’s only when we step into the elevator and I check my own watch that I realize she took the long way home. I close my eyes and breathe in the time, desperate to make the most of it while I still have it. The long way home. I don’t dare think it, but what if she wants to spend more time with me too?
What if we’re meant to be more?
CHAPTER 19
OLIVIA
There’s a rap on my office door. I take a breath, draw myself up as tall as I can, and say, “Come in.”
The door squeaks open. I've been meaning to have that oiled for ages but I only remember when somebody else comes in. “Miles,” I say with a smile. “Thank you for coming.”
“Of course,” he says. “Even if it wasn’t my pleasure, it’s not like I have a whole lot of choice, is it? Technically I’m doing part of what I’m employed to do.”
“So now you care about your contract?” I say, raising both eyebrows as high as they can go.
He shrugs. “Only when you’re involved.” My eyebrows stay utterly motionless. That is decidedly not true. Miles has never ever done anything to make my life easier. Or at least that used to be the case.
To my relief, these days, he really does seem to be acting more like a normal person. Maybe I should feel like I’m being taken advantage of. But somehow, I don't. Somehow, despite everything, anytime he lets me down, he makes it back up to me. Anytime he has to put on his act, he lets down his guard a little more with me.
I just wish he’d learn to let down that mask more often for everyone else. I wish he could be brave enough to show everyone who he really is.
Anyway, it's not like we sleep together that much. Sort of.
“So, interview, yeah?” he says, sauntering into the room and dropping down into the seat on the other side of my desk without even being asked.
“Interview,” I say, parroting him in agreement.
“What’s it for?”
