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Fast forward to 8:45. I pay for parking and carry my gym bag and the yoga mat I bought for this outing towards Namaste, the yoga studio. Immediately, I spot Mandy waiting outside the door on a bench, staring straight down at her phone, oblivious to the world around her. Even from a distance, she looks flawless and intimidating as hell. She’s wearing a black crop top with matching leggings and white sneakers. Her bleach blonde hair is in a perfect high ponytail, and her French manicured fingers loudly tap on her phone screen.
“Hi” I say nervously, as I approach her.
“Hey.” she says back, not bothering to look in my direction. After probably a full minute of awkward silence, she pulls a water bottle out of her bag. “Ugh, where is Caroline? We will not get a good spot inside if she’s late.”
As if on cue, we look up to see Caroline rushing across the street towards us. She looks just as flawless as Mandy does. She’s wearing an olive green crop top and legging combo, with a high teased ponytail. If I’m not mistaken, they are wearing the same outfit, just in different colors. I glance down at my own clothes. I paired my fake leggings with a bright pink fitted tank top. I thought I looked cute when I left the house, but now, in the presence of these two, I feel so much less polished. Honestly, I didn’t know my self confidence could get any lower than it was already, but here we are.
“Ugh, sorry, guys!” She says, stopping in front of us. “I had a hard time finding a place to park. The parking lot is almost full already. I had to park next to some old crappy Honda.” She whispers that last sentence, with one hand covering her mouth like she’s saying a bad word. “Hopefully they don’t scratch my Wagoneer when they leave.”
Caroline turns to look at me. My mouth is slightly hanging open and I can’t hide the look of confusion on my face.
“I try to only park next to cars that are newer and nicer, so hopefully the owner will respect the surrounding cars when they are getting in. I never get door dinged by other nice vehicles.” She explains.
“Oh, yeah, that makes sense.” I say, trying to remember what direction she came from. Not far from here, I parked my Honda in a busy lot. Surely there is no way she was talking about my car, right? My car isn’t brand new, but it’s far from old and shitty. I shake the thought from my head. No, she has to be talking about an older Honda with missing hubcaps and duct tape holding the mirrors on and dents all over the body. I can not let myself get worked up for no reason.
“You guys ready?” Mandy asks, already sounding bored. She picks up her things and heads towards the door without waiting for an answer.
I obediently grab my bag and follow along in her path. Mandy has kind of always struck me as a bitch, while Caroline is at least a little warm and welcoming. I have mentioned this to Elliott before, and he agreed Mandy is kind of gruff, but that’s just her personality. She’s a nurse and from the stories Elliott tells me, she deals with a lot of stupidity daily, making her a bit cynical. Basically, he told me she has a very low tolerance limit for people, but he swears she’s a great person, at least as far as Greg says.
I suppose I haven’t spent enough time with the two of these ladies to really pass too much judgment on them. Caroline works in Pharmaceutical Sales, so she spends a lot of time in and out of doctors’ offices. I think she is just naturally good at being nice and bubbly towards people, whether or not she means to, because it’s a key component of her job.
We pay our fees and quickly sign our waivers. Normally, I would at least pretend to read the paper I am signing, but today I feel like I have to rush so I don’t get left behind. I feel like a third wheel already, or like someone’s annoying little sister that has to tag along, even though no one wants her there. Carefully, I lay my mat down on the floor in the large yoga room just as the instructor enters the room.
“Hi ladies! I see a few unfamiliar faces in here today. I’m Gail and I’ll be your instructor.” Her eyes land on me and she sends me a gentle smile. “We are going to get started in about five minutes. This is a great time to get some water and take a potty break.” She announces in a very calm but kind voice before leaving the room once again.
“I better run to the restroom.” I whisper to Caroline before slipping out of the room. She nods in response while busying herself with some light stretching.
On my way back, I pause just long enough to notice Mandy and Caroline through the window. They are huddled together and giggling, engrossed in some sort of joke between the two of them. I smile to myself, thankful that Mandy’s mood seems to be lifted. Maybe she’s defrosted a bit and will at least be tolerable for the rest of the day. That feeling of relief doesn’t last long, though. As soon as I walk back into the room, they both look at me and abruptly stop talking. It’s obvious that they were talking about me or talking about something they didn’t want me to hear. Suddenly, I feel like I’m thrown back into high school and stuck working with a couple of mean girls on a science project. It takes every bit of strength in my body to not gather my things and leave. I am way too old to be subjected to people that make me feel like I don’t belong, but somehow here I am. Instead, I try to hide the fact that my feelings are hurt and I take a seat on my mat just as Gail walks back in to start the class.
“Welcome everyone.” She announces. “Once again, I am Gail and I’ll be leading today’s hot yoga session. We are going to get started with a brief warm up while this room works to reach a balmy 99 degrees, since the door is now shut.”
I look around the room with wide eyes. 99 degrees? The rest of the attendees look on as though they’ve heard this opening information too many times already.
She continues, “Please remember, if you get lightheaded or dizzy, take a break. Get out of the pose and get a drink of water. Don’t die. It’ll make me look really bad.”
The class erupts in light laughter after that last line, and I wonder again if I should have left when I had the chance. What have I gotten myself into?
* * *
I make my way into the lobby of the yoga studio and lean against the concrete wall. Slowly, I allow my body to melt until I am sitting on the floor. The cold concrete immediately works to bring my body back down to its normal temperature. I sip my water and try to steady my breathing while begging myself not to pass out.
The door to the studio swings open and out walk my yoga companions. Caroline has my yoga mat and gym bag under her arm, while Mandy follows along behind her, looking annoyed as usual. Immediately, Caroline moves to sit next to me. “Tyler, are you okay?” She asks, her eyes searching mine.
My breathing has finally returned to normal, and the feeling of embarrassment has taken over instead. “I think so.” I respond with a nod, while wiping sweat from my forehead.
“Did you get lightheaded?” Mandy asks accusingly.
I nod and down the rest of my water bottle. “I don’t know what happened. I was doing okay, but suddenly I felt like I was going to fall on my face during downward dog. Child’s pose didn’t make me feel any better either, and I just had to get out of there.” I cover my eyes. “That was so embarrassing.”
“Did you eat today?” Mandy asks, sounding annoyed, as she shifts her bag from one shoulder to another. It’s clear that I have ruined her Saturday morning and she doesn’t bother to hide it.
I shake my head. “No, I didn’t want it to upset my stomach before class.”
“What about water? Did you drink water this morning?”
I wince. “I had coffee on the way to the studio.”
Mandy rolls her eyes. “I know you probably don’t workout a lot,” Mandy says, looking me up and down with an obvious judgmental eye, “but you have got to eat before working out and you have to hydrate before hot yoga.” She finishes with her arms crossed over her chest. “Or you might, oh I don’t know, get lightheaded and pass out.”
