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The morning comes and goes in a blur.
There’s coffee. Some food. We all talk.
Everyone asks where Jax is.
Everyone seems to look at me when they ask it.
I have to play stupid and say I don’t know either. Eventually I caved and said as I woke up he was leaving. Partially the truth.
When we get back on campus, things still feel empty.
It’s hard to think about. I guess.
Mac’s life is forever changed now. So is Violet’s. There’s a ton of questions that only Mac will find the answers to.
Honestly, that’s the least of what’s on my mind right now.
Without even thinking I find myself walking to Ward’s dorm.
I have this insane vision of me catching him with someone else.
Really, Mila? That’s the route you want here?
I don’t even know why I’m going to see Ward.
From what I remember from our last conversation, I said what I had to say to him. I made it clear I could not do this thing with him any longer. Maybe he was drunk, hungover, or stuck somewhere between that… so maybe I’m on my way to talk to him to make sure thing are clear.
Guilt hits my stomach when I see his building.
My heart races.
There’s a voice inside my head…
Think about it, Mila. You’re really done with Ward? Over what? Because of him drinking too much?
Oh, that’s ironic, huh?
Wasn’t I the one who was drunk just last night…?
In a gazebo with a hockey player? Letting him touch me? Letting him kiss me?
My body shivers. My nipples perk up. My inner thighs ache for more of Jax.
And here I am just feet away from Ward’s dorm.
I reach for the doorknob. Then I pause.
I knock instead.
I’m not sure if I’m allowed to just walk into the room right now or not.
I don’t know what we are.
I don’t know what he thinks we are.
I just…
I’ve managed to really mess things up without even really trying or realizing it until now.
