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“I told him I would talk to you first,” Willow says. “So you don’t feel blindsided by him.”
I swallow hard. “Yeah. It’s fine.”
“Are you sure, Mila?”
“Yes. Let him say whatever he wants. The less baggage he takes with him into rehab, right?”
“Thank you for that,” Willow says.
She hugs me again.
She leaves the coffee shop and I sit down.
I watch as she walks up to Ward and says something to him. He looks right at me.
Then he begins his walk toward me.
He enters the coffee shop and sits down where Jax had been sitting.
“Can I buy you a coffee?” I ask.
“No,” he says. “You’ve done enough for me, Mila. Not just what happened either. It’s been happening all the time, hasn’t it?”
I nod.
“I didn’t mean what I texted you.”
“It sure scared me, Ward.”
“I know it did.” He looks down. “I just wanted your attention.” He lifts his gaze. “I know it’s been rough for us. I know I’ve put you in a bad position. I know we’ve said things to each other. I’ve said things. Done things…”
“Ward, I just want you to get some help,” I say. “I don’t want to find out you really did hurt yourself. Or worse. Okay? I don’t want you dead. I can’t believe I even have to say that.”
“I know. It’s fucked up. I fucked up. I fucked up big time, Mila. I fucked everything up with us.”
“Ward, you need to focus on yourself.”
“I am. I will. I want to do this, Mila. I want to go to rehab and get this figured out. I know I can’t live like this.”
“For what it’s worth, I’m proud of you for saying that. It’s better than you being forced into rehab.”
“There’s something I need from you, Mila. There’s only one way I can do this.”
“Okay.”
“You.”
“Me?”
“You, Mila. You’re the reason I’m doing this. You’re the reason I’m going to make it through.”
“No, Ward. That doesn’t work. You have to do it for yourself.”
“I am doing it for myself, Mila. But you’re my inspiration for this. Knowing what I put you through and all that. It’s not right. So I’m doing this to come back for you. That’s what I’m trying to say. When I’m done with the program… or whatever they want to call it… I need to know you’ll be here…”
My heart sinks a little.
Ward reaches across the table and tries to touch my hands.
