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Instead of leaving and doing what he is told, he ambles deeper into the kitchen and takes a seat beside me in the breakfast nook. His gaze is trained on me, assessing me in that way he has since the beginning.
“Do you want me to stay?” Typical Diego, never beating around the bush.
“Yes.” My reply is instant and honest. “I am still an island in an ocean of Gallo.”
Diego nods. “Good. It’s time for me to put down some roots as well. Can’t live life on the move forever. Has Alejandra been working through the books?”
“Yes.”
“You don’t sound happy.”
“I’m not. My uncle had his fingers in so many pies that it’s hard to keep track of everything.” I feel a headache brewing already and it’s not even ten o’clock yet. “I still have to worry about Konnor’s retaliation for Devon’s death, Regina won’t come out of her room, and Rafe is acting like the perfect husband.”
“That last part shouldn’t worry you,” he says and chuckles.
“And yet it does. Do you know what happens to people who try to force themselves into a mold that wasn’t intended for them? They bottle up their anger, fear, all their emotions until they fucking blow up. I don’t want that for him, for us.” My confession falls from my lips without my permission.
Diego nods his understanding.
“Let’s work through the problems as they arise,” he suggests. “Konnor has closed ranks but I don’t think he will make his move anytime soon. As for Regina, that is one you will have to take care of on your own.”
“And everything Sebastian has destroyed in his wake. The lives he has ruined? How do I atone for that?”
“You don’t. You fix what you can and make sure it doesn’t happen again. His mistakes aren’t yours to wear, but if you want the Hernandez name to be worth more than dirt, you need to take control now.”
Diego’s words repeat in my mind. I am not my uncle and his mistakes are not mine. I need to stop punishing myself for things I didn’t do and couldn’t control. Leaving him in the kitchen I make my way to Rafe’s office. The door is open and I enter without knocking. Dom almost knocks me over in his haste to leave.
“Get your fucking murderer for hire under control,” he says with a glare.
I wait until he slams the door before facing my husband with an arched brow.
“He’s unhappy that Diego might be staying,” Rafe says by way of explanation.
“Is staying,” I correct.
“That’s good?” Rafe asks.
“Yes. Diego is definitely someone to have around, especially with everything else we have going on.” Taking a seat across from his desk I fold my hands in my lap. “I need to go to the compound.”
“Why?” Rafe straightens in his chair.
“Alejandra found something in her hunt through my uncle’s accounting that she won’t disclose over the phone,” I explain calmly. “We are currently running two families and I haven’t been out of the house in a week.”
“Konnor,” Rafe starts, but I cut him off.
“He isn’t going to make his move now. Knowing him the way I do, he will draw this out and wait until you have forgotten he is waiting in the wings before he strikes.”
“It still disturbs me to know that you have a better grasp on that psycho than anyone else. That your families were so close and no one knew about it.” Rafe shakes his head in disbelief. “If you really believe that is true, then I will accompany you in an hour.”
“Thank you,” I say, rising from my seat to leave him to his work.
A minute later, standing in the middle of our room, it hits me just how awkward everything is now. You would think it would have always been awkward, but no. Through kidnappings, death, violations on both ends, and so many broken promises, we have always known where we stood with one another. Now, it’s like we are caught in limbo. We aren’t moving forward, instead caught in this stupid little dance where we try not to offend or upset the other.
With the things he still doesn’t know, there is bound to be a blow-up sooner or later, but I can’t tell him everything just yet.
Chapter Fifteen
I Walk Alone
