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Carly hadn’t even thought of food for herself. “Sam will bring me something. He’s been reminding me to eat by bringing me rabbits and squirrels.”
Justin shook his head with a soft laugh. “I take it that you’ve learned to clean game?”
“Yeah. While you were sick, my mind was on you, not on what I was doing, so it didn’t really bother me.” Her voice trembled a bit, remembering those dark and terrible hours when she didn’t know if she was helping him or hurting him, when she knew that he could possibly die and there was nothing she could do about it. She never wanted to feel that horrifying helplessness again.
“Oh, Carly.” His eyes were soft and sad. “I’m so sorry that I scared you so badly.”
“I was just scared I wasn’t doing the right things to help you.”
Justin put his plate aside. “Come here.”
Carly went happily into his arms and laid her head on his chest. The strong, steady thump of his heart reassured her.
“You never cease to amaze me,” he whispered into her hair. “Every time there’s a challenge, you surpass it with flying colors. You know, you’re more of a survivor than I am.”
“What do you mean?”
“The way you adapt, figure things out, and refuse to be defeated by anything. I’m trained. I do these things from knowledge. You figure them out on your own, and you never back down in the face of adversity. And you have the kind of courage that seasoned warriors would envy.” The soft rumble of his voice beneath her ear was soothing, as was the kiss he brushed on the top of her head. She remembered him telling her right after they had left Juneau that he thought she was a survivor. Was this the sort of thing he had meant?
“I’m not brave,” Carly said quietly. “I was scared to death.”
“Courage isn’t the absence of fear; it’s forging ahead despite that fear.”
“I just did what I had to do.”
“That’s what’s so special.”
Carly could see that he wasn’t going to understand, but she felt weird allowing him to believe she had virtues that she didn’t. “Eat your eggs before they get cold,” she said and left his embrace.
“Share with me. You made me far too much.”
“I’ll go get a fork.”
He shrugged. “We’ll share that, too.” He speared a mouthful of eggs on his fork’s tines and held it out to her. Carly opened her mouth and he placed the bite inside.
“I’m amazed at how good these are,” she said. “I’d never believe that powdered stuff would taste this good.”
“One of the rare exceptions. Open up.”
Carly did, and he put another forkful of eggs into her mouth before taking a bite himself. He alternated feeding himself and Carly until the plate was empty. Both of them were pleasantly full.
“Wow, I really did make too much,” Carly said with a sigh. She lay back on the sleeping bag beside him. He reached out a searching hand until he found hers and clasped it, twining their fingers. They lay in companionable silence for a while.
She peered over at him to see if he was asleep and saw his eyes were open. He was gazing at the top of the tent with a thoughtful expression. “Justin?”
“Mmm?”
“I need to tell you something.”
“What?”
Carly took a deep breath. “I love you.”
Justin said nothing, though his eyes widened. A sharp dart of pain stabbed her heart at his silence, but she didn’t regret saying it. If this experience had taught her nothing else, it was that important things like that should never remain unsaid. You never knew when life could take away your chance to do it, when it would suddenly be too late. She forged ahead. “I love you. When you were laying there so sick, I kept thinking you might die without knowing it, without ever hearing it, and I needed to tell you.”
The silence was heavy, oppressive. Carly wanted to run out of the tent and hide herself in the woods for a nice, long cry.
Justin rolled over to face her. His hand tightened on hers until it was an almost bruising pressure. “Oh, God, Carly, do you really mean it?”
