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I blink. When I’d heard that she and her new husband were trying for kids, I was thrilled for her, that she’d found someone to share her dreams with. And then last winter, a rumor was going around that she might be pregnant. I’d steered clear, wanting to avoid any speculation about our failed marriage. Looks like Mom heard the news too, but for whatever reason, tiptoed around me.
“It’s a boy, so he’s Blake Jr. Isn’t that lovely?”
“Uh-huh.” I swallow roughly, wondering why it’s making me feel emotional. “I’m pleased for her and Blake. I hope they’re blissfully happy.”
“Do you?” Mom asks, eyeing me again.
“I do. We weren’t right for each other, and I feel bad about that. But I still consider her a friend.” Though we haven’t really stayed in touch the last couple of years. And now I saw why—she’s been busy. “That’s all our marriage was. Friendship because I…” I trail off and dig into my toast, regretting I said as much as I did.
“You…what?” Mom urges. “What were you gonna say?”
“I know you’re disappointed I’m not married with kids, but I’ve never felt that way about anyone except one person, and it wasn’t Aimee.”
“Then why did you marry her?” Dad asks pointedly.
“Because I thought…I thought I could learn to love her in that way. And I wanted you to be…I don’t know exactly. Maybe proud of me?”
“For being married and having kids?” Dad’s eyebrows knit together. “We’re proud of you regardless.”
“Are you, though?” Somehow I’m feeling raw and vulnerable this morning, especially after last night. “Would you be proud no matter what?”
“Well, now you’re scaring me,” Mom says, and my parents share a look. “What does that mean?”
“Not sure. I’m sorry. I’m just having a moment, I guess. Just ignore me.”
My dad’s hand lands on my shoulder. “I know the pressure of running this ranch can get to you. But you’re doing a wonderful job, and I trust you to make your own decisions about your future.”
My heart balloons in my chest because fuck, it’s good to hear. “Thank you.”
We grow silent as we finish our breakfast. But I can still feel Mom’s gaze on me, wondering what that was all about. And I decide right then that I’ll tell them both about being bisexual. Just not today.
“Is Aimee staying with her folks?” I ask. “Maybe we can catch up.”
“As a matter of fact…” Mom stands to clear dishes. “I invited her for lunch.”
Ah, there it is. “When?”
She averts her gaze. “Today.”
I tamp down my frustration that she didn’t check with me first, instead focusing on the opportunity to see an old friend. “Then I better get to my chores so I can make time for her visit.”
I go through the rest of the morning in a fog, and it’s almost like I’m living in the past again. Aimee’s imminent arrival, right on the heels of Porter’s confession that he left town shortly after seeing us together that day, has thrown me for a loop.
The men notice, but no one says anything except for Wade. “You okay, boss?”
My eyes briefly meet Porter’s before he looks away. “Yeah, sure. Just need more coffee.”
We’re outside the stable, discussing how well our morning of weaning the calves from the cows went, when I see dust kicking up the driveway. Aimee parks her vehicle, then steps out to reach for her son in the car seat. It feels surreal to see that tiny baby in her arms.
I don’t look at Porter. I can’t. It’s been awkward enough as it is this morning.
I lift my hand in a wave as I head over to her. “Hey, stranger!”
She pulls me into a one-armed hug. “It’s so good to see you.”
She introduces me to her napping baby, and I marvel at his tiny fingers and toes. My parents greet her from the porch and motion for us to come inside.
At the bottom of the steps, Aimee turns to me. “You look good. You been okay?”
