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Halo also learned that as a K9 handler, he couldn’t act like his teammates, who often walked around seemingly armor-plated when it came to emotions. Even keel, unperturbed, that’s how operators managed. They bypassed emotions like anger, anxiety, and sadness. But, Halo observed that if his brothers were unwilling to face negative emotions, eventually, they lost their emotional range on the other side of the spectrum. If his brothers stood at the fulcrum, not letting things tip the scale where feelings might outweigh training and calculation—which could prove lethal in the field—it also prevented them from the other end of the spectrum where joy lived.
A human’s closed-off emotions, though, shut a dog down. It was as if they didn’t trust that person and wouldn’t bond.
In Halo’s early days learning to work with military K9s, he and a handful of others were sent to special classes on emotional intelligence. They attended therapy as part of a research initiative to find out if being a full-spectrum human with healthy mental health habits made for a better dog handler.
The scientists never presented the findings to Halo, and he didn’t much care about the researchers’ conclusions. Halo’s gut told him that the research hypothesis had been tight.
When Halo expressed emotions, talking to his dogs like they were the intimate partners that they were, he felt certain that his authenticity and candor built trust between them as working partners.
To gain a dog’s trust was the ultimate reward. It was something that Halo was glad to work towards. And he felt like that translated into better relationships outside of the job as well. Friends, family, yeah, that was all going to plan.
But now that he was turning forty, Halo was getting a new perspective. He could see over the hill down into the length of fertile soil that stretched out to the horizon. And for the last little bit, he’d come to realize that he no longer wanted to walk that trail alone.
He just didn’t.
Pulling all those thoughts together with one big, red, shiny bow, Halo came to this conclusion: When they were at the airport, and Max saw Mary, he bloody well knew something about her that Halo had not yet perceived.
And in that airport, Halo made a terrible mistake.
He should have trusted his dog.
Chapter Sixteen
Mary had dragged her shirt over her head in the cab on her way to her hotel. By the time they pulled up, she was lacing up her second shoe.
Pulling her credit card from the sleave on the back of her phone, she extended it over the seat. The man shook his hands in the air. “You need to go in and take care of yourself.”
Kind. “Thank you so much.”
Deidre was still sitting on the bench outside under the tree, scrolling her phone. She turned to Mary. “What in the actual heck?”
Waggling an exhausted hand in the air, Mary turned toward the automatic doors.
The front desk staff followed her progress with wide, unblinking eyes.
Mary approached the guy who had given her the directions earlier. “I was on the way to the pharmacy.” She turned to look toward the door. “There was a fire.”
“Do you need a doctor?” he asked.
“I could really use a room. I know it’s early, but a shower and a nap would be nice right now.”
“Of course!” He unlocked the closet and wheeled their bags out. Deidre was kind enough to shut the hell up as they went up the elevator, down the hall, and into their room.
“Shower,” Deidre said as she pointed to the bathroom.
Standing under the water, letting it sluice over her back, Mary lifted her hair and sniffed it. It stank of chemicals and ash.
As she closed her eyes and just appreciated the feel of clean water, Mary pictured Halo looking at her through the back window of the cab as she drove away.
He hadn’t moved other than to put his hands on his hips and furrow his brow as if this whole scene was beyond him. Shards of fractured glass that were supposed to fit together. Mary couldn’t fathom what might be going on in his head, standing there like an action hero on a movie screen.
Shit, he’s a hero on a movie screen.
She laid her forehead on the tile.
Tallinn, Mary had read in the book she’d snatched up in the Geneva airport, was known for the number of movies that took advantage of the gorgeous settings.
That must be why that group of massive, handsome men and their dog were in the street with matching uniform-like outfits, speaking English.
