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I nodded, my lips quivering as I covered my chest. He didn’t falter. Rushing but keeping the bandage tight. I could hear only a small breath when I moved my arms and my breasts fell free. Still, he did not look down. Even if he had, I’m not sure it would have been as intoxicating as that gaze on me.
“Better?” he whispered as soon as the fabric was tied.
“Thank you. Yes.”
He dried my things, and I dressed, letting that moment replay in my head repeatedly. As much as I pleaded with my mind to focus, I could hardly manage. Even though this journey had just become far more dangerous.
But I would not let myself be afraid or weak. Not as he carefully pushed the sleigh across the top of the ice. Not as he gathered all four of our horses and brought them to me on the opposite side. Not even as the sun dropped, and the night fell bitterly cold.
“We’ll have to stop,” Atlas said, at last, shivering beside me. “We can’t push the horses through the night.”
“The water ruined their food.”
“We’ll restock in the Forest Coven. I have friends there. Some shifters live at the base of the summit, and they’ll have food for us, too.”
The ball of fire from the queen had survived through Atlas’ protective barrier. But when I refused the dome over the sleigh, unable to see beyond the entrapment, he hadn’t protested. Just used his wind to dry everything he could and buried us both in all the furs and blankets.
“And for tonight?” I asked, scanning the tundra of dead trees, ice and snow.
“We have to find shelter, Marley. I’ll leave a door, and if it gets to be too much, you can say, and we’ll try to keep going. Can you deal with that?”
Though I hated the thought, I couldn’t bear the cold another second. Each shiver wracked my body with so much pain, eventually I’d pass out from it. Even with that warm ball of fire between us, it wasn’t enough without something to trap the heat in.
“I’ll deal with it,” I managed through chattering teeth.
He cast over the horses first, explaining that they may be afraid of the magic, but their body heats would help keep them warm. I wondered why he hadn’t done this the first night, but of course he hadn’t. He didn’t use magic unless he absolutely had to. It was not a convenience, but a hindrance to his pride. That was the fight within him, I realized. Even if he hadn’t. Once he’d set his mind, that was it.
Our dome was warm within minutes, but I was chilled to the bone, and I knew it would take more than one night for me to feel anything but the muscle aches from shivering, the stabbing in my ribs, and the pang of hunger in my stomach.
When we lay down, there was no pillow between us, and we scooted together without words. For warmth, mostly, I convinced myself. Atlas brought his arms behind his head, staring up at the moon while I rested on his chest, mindful of my tender ribs.
“What was it like? Being a wolf?”
His broad chest rose and fell, the silence hanging between us. “It was like… when a witch grounds themself and they become connected to the Earth differently than we all already are. Only it’s really the moon that speaks to you, calls to you. It’s like feeling light surge and empower you. Like being one with everything and yet… somehow alone. Though I’m not sure if that was the wolf or the man peeking through.”
“Did you lose the pack when your father kicked you out?”
“Yes,” he whispered, his voice so soft I hardly heard him.
“I wonder if something in you misses having that more than you realize. If that’s where the loneliness comes from.”
“I have my friends. They’re my pack now.”
I slowly reached an arm over his chest but my ribs protested and I had to move to my back. “They’re lucky to have such a loyal and decent friend.”
“When Torryn pulled the short stick to go to the human lands and guard Eden, I volunteered. I’ve never told anyone that. He still thinks I didn’t have a choice. Going there, I gave up most of what I knew, but I kept a brother safe and gained Eden’s friendship. And going to the human lands, you don’t know if you’re going to make it home. It’s dangerous to get back. It was worth it, though.”
My eyes grew heavy as he spoke, the smooth tone of his voice a comfort, lulling me to sleep while he spoke the memories of his friendships out loud. But that comfort of sleep didn’t last as my eyes shot open, and Present hovered above us.
14
“I don’t think the goddess would approve, witch,” Present hissed, staring at the way I laid in Atlas’ arm while we slept.. “You know he is marked.”
Looking at her was always like peering into a mirror. She looked like me, spoke like me, even mimicked my mannerisms. On my best days, it was jarring. Looking into my own face when I’d just been startled awake was a whole other beast.
“I’ve called you twice now, and you didn’t come. What is the point of this spell if it doesn’t help me, too?” I tried to keep my voice low to spare Atlas losing minutes of precious sleep.
She scoffed. “The magic is not there to help you. It’s there to help others.”
