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“Being a princess was all I knew. My father wasn’t kind. I didn’t know a thing about my mother. He refused to speak of her. He took down every painting of the two of them and had them destroyed so I could never lay eyes on her. She was his and never mine. He loved her, and when I killed her, I killed a piece of him, too. The part of him that was still human and soft.”
“You didn’t kill your mother, Dey.”
I cut a glance at him, watching the lingering, warm sunlight caress his sharp jawline. “That’s how it works. Her death was my first kill.”
“No.” He shook his head. “You were a baby. You had no control.”
“I have no control now, Orin. Even when I fight it, even when I’ve tried everything else, madness takes over until I’m no longer in control of myself.”
“I hate the madness for you. If I could will it away, I would.”
“It’s not like your life is ideal, if we’re discussing the pitfalls. Being bound to Drexel is a dangerous entanglement, and we both know it.”
He took a final swig of his liquor before swinging the ice around in his glass. “I’m sure you know he wants you, too. You’ve been a target for a long, long time. But you have to stay away from him. If he has control of you… he will force you to use that magic. He’ll make you perform your murders on a stage in front of hundreds, night after night, turning you into a spectacle.”
“It’s worse than that,” I agreed. “There’s something… something I want to tell you. Something no one knows of harbinger magic.”
I couldn’t believe the words had left my mouth, and the second they had, I regretted it. But how could I go back after teasing such a secret? “You mustn’t repeat this. At all costs necessary, you have to find loopholes to make sure no one, not even Drexel, ever knows.”
Setting the glass down, he twisted to face me fully. “If it risks your safety, Deyanira, do not speak the words to me. I can’t vow them into silence.”
“You’ve given me a home, Orin. You put these amazing people in my life, and I fought you every step of the way. I know you were forced into marrying me, and I know it’s not what either of us wanted. It was the worst of circumstances months ago, but there’s peace here now. Because you’ve pushed for it and done things to protect me, even if you felt in your soul I didn’t deserve it. I trust you, and this is something I can share to prove that to you. The only gift I can give is the truth.”
He nodded. “Okay, Wife. Tell me about the Maiden’s secret.”
“Our power is not infinite. There’s a reason the Maidens of the past didn’t decimate the world, regardless of the bloodlust. Because all magic comes with a cost, and the cost is chipping away at the fabric of who we are. It’s likely why there were Maidens that died before their hundred years. Never because Death called them to his court early, but because they’d depleted themselves. The reason Death does not call me into his court every night is because the power is too strong, and when wielded too often, I could die.”
He considered my confession for several moments, running a finger over the smooth rim of his glass. “Every time a Maiden kills, they use the power? Even if they choose the kill themselves and not Death?”
“Fractionally, yes. When we were in the castle to save Quill, I could feel the beast within me wake. Even though the choice to end the guards had been solely mine, I know Death will come for their souls, eventually. I know without question that I will see every single soul I’ve reaped again when I enter Death’s court for the final time. Even my parents.
“The Maestro is dangerous on many levels. But he doesn’t know the boundaries. If he captures me by contract, he will slaughter so many for a show, a thrill. He’s been hunting me since I was a child, and the strongest reason to stay the hell away from him, if not for the lives of the innocent, is because he’ll put me into a grave.”
“I’d never let him do that.”
“My father, King of Perth, couldn’t control him. Neither can you.”
Orin ran a hand through his hair, staring off into nothing. “It’s no secret that he wants you…”
I studied the hard planes of his face, the way his steady breaths lifted his broad shoulders, the way the orange glow of light illuminated the amber flecks in his eyes. I could see the guilt on his face, in the turn of his brow. The discomfort was thick in the air, reminding us that our beginning was sparked by Orin’s easy lies.
“He can’t have me…” I whispered.
“He’s a patient man, Nightmare.”
“When I was twelve, maybe thirteen, I’d been standing at the door, wondering when the staff would return. My father always sent them away on the anniversary of my mother’s death because that’s all this day was to him. Anyway, a tall man with bushy black hair and a red jacket and the most elaborate top hat I’d ever seen walked up the circle drive and stood at the base of the steps, carrying a large white box with long black ribbons. I remember he pulled the hat from his head, flourished his hand, and gave me the box. I didn’t understand birthdays at the time. I’d never heard of them. But he’d wished me a happy birthday from his boss and walked off. The second my fingers gripped that ribbon, my father shouted my name. He took the gift and made me watch as he tossed it into the fireplace in the grand hall. Maybe Drexel is patient, but I learned how to play this game from a ruthless man a long time ago.”
Orin rubbed his eyes with his palms. “I thought having only one parent was something we had in common, but you never had a parent at all, and I’m sorry for it.”
“Don’t be.” I stretched my arms above my head, staring at the final rays of sunlight. “For all his flaws, I know something in him had cared for me. Even if it was only the sliver of my mother that showed through, whether he wanted it or not. He taught me to be strong in a world where the weak never truly survive the hunters.” Pausing, I chose my next words carefully. “When I met you, you said I’d killed your brother, your father, and your neighbor. I’m sorry. For what it’s worth.”
He faded into silence, seeming to slip a million miles away.
So, I continued, if only to fill the awkward silence. “It seems odd to me that Death would choose so many people close to you. Your father and your brother?”
He was silent for a few minutes before answering. “Ezra wasn’t my real brother. But he was my best friend. I might have lied about my father. I really don’t know who he was. You’re welcome to prod my mother for information, but she’s never given in to my questions, so don’t hold your breath. Whomever he was, I have to believe he’s dead now. Because how could he just walk away from her?”
I stewed on that for several moments before saying something I immediately regretted. “Do you think the Maestro could be your secret father? And maybe he never really left?”
