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“Do you actually donate to those organizations?” I hated dealing with scam charities. I found my charities early on and triple checked how well they ran. And each year, I reviewed that. I made sure they were properly registered as charities. That the costs for everything remained low. Hence why Hope’s Embrace was my number one charity organization.
“I don’t and I’m pretty sure my parents have stakes in it. Won’t stop that damn writer from talking about it.”
“If you could write your own personal statement, what would you write?” I asked.
He mulled it over. “My interest in security, I think. How my current goals would be to learn more about business so I can have my own security company. About the charities and business I truly care about supporting. About how I want to help people feel safe.”
His gaze met mine, steadied by his resolve. It felt like there was more he wanted to say, but instead he gave me a tight smile.
“Installing the security at your house made me realize how important it was for people to feel safe in their own homes. I want to help do that in the future.”
“That’s a great goal,” I said, grabbing his hand. “And I know you’ll definitely do it too. You’re stubborn.”
He laughed at my remark. “What about you? Have you written a personal statement yet?”
I shook my head. I didn’t even know which college I was going to apply to. I had to do it soon though.
“What are you thinking about writing?”
“Definitely my passion to help abuse victims,” I said in a low voice. “Maybe my own story. Is that something we’re supposed to write about? Or is that too gimmicky?”
“You should write about it. All of it. What you went through, how you got away from it, how you help others to get away from it too. You shouldn’t shy away from it. It’s your story and if there is anyone worthy of sharing their story, it’s you. You have a strong history to share, a crazy passion to talk about. Don’t hold back. Knock those judgmental admissions committees on their ass. Make it so they can’t say no to you because you deserve it. You fought hard to go to college.”
“Did I though?” I asked.
“I read a statistic just last week. That nearly five children a day die due to child abuse.” Bryan’s chest expanded as he took in a deep breath. His voice broke as he said, “And that could have easily been you. Nearly was when your mom put you in the hospital. Cadence, you nearly didn’t make it to eighteen.”
His words were a gut punch and I took in a sharp breath as I blinked furiously. He was right too and I hated that. I knew the statistics. I paid attention to them. I read all the horror stories of children who lost against their parents, of the ones too late to save.
“Justin too,” I said softly.
“Him too. And it scares the shit out of me to even try to imagine a world without either of you. Where I would be without you guys. And then I become so fucking grateful, because you did survive. You are alive. And both of you are going to be eighteen. Both of you are going to make it to adulthood and no asshole will ever hurt either of you again.”
Bryan coughed and looked away from me as his eyes shone with tears.
I got it. I really did.
What he talked about was completely true, and frankly, I never thought I would make it to eighteen either. I had felt so trapped. So in danger when I lived with Lindie. And it took her putting me in the hospital, nearly dead, for me to be free of her. If she had done any more damage, I wouldn’t have left the hospital. I wouldn’t have survived. One more foot stomp. One more time smashing my head against something. One more attempt at trying to turn my insides into mush. All it would have taken was one more second of no one stopping her and I wouldn’t be breathing anymore.
Damn. I didn’t think we’d have this kind of conversation while waiting for Paxon’s final soccer match. It was too heavy. Too true.
“I still don’t know,” I admitted, swallowing hard. “I don’t know what I want to do. Do I keep with the music? Try something else?”
“Nothing is set in stone,” Seth finally said, nudging me to make sure I was paying attention. “Try something out. And if you don’t like it. Try something else.”
“Sounds like a waste of time,” I said.
“If it means you find something you actually want to do for the rest of your life, I think it’s worth it.” Seth shrugged. “I mean look at Toby. I’m pretty sure he’s changed his mind ten times in the last hour.”
“Don’t drag me into this,” Toby said from behind us. “And I did no such thing. I’d have to be thinking about my future to be able to change my mind.”
“What are you going to do?” I asked.
“Music,” Toby said instantly. He sounded so positive. I wished I had that confidence.
“And Justin?” I turned so I could see him next to Toby.
Justin gave me a small smile. “Engineering. Maybe civil or mechanical. I’m not sure.”
