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“The guys have talked about it.”
Benji made a humming noise and something dark flashed across his expression. “Right. Your friends.” The way he said that sent a tingle of awareness crawling through me.
I wanted to puke as my thoughts went back to the assault. His expression was too similar to those boys. It was clear he was looking at me as something to be used rather than a human being. Benji was crass and angry for some reason. Ever since rumors about me and the guys began circling, he’d become one of the worst, always making disgusting comments that the guys knew about and I didn’t need to hear to understand.
Frankly, I was surprised he was even here. I had nearly blurted it out when I turned around realized it was Benji who joined me.
“We’re slated to win the championship. We’re at our best this year.”
“So?” I asked.
“Paxon.”
“Is an excellent player.”
“When he isn’t distracted by you.”
I snorted. “That’s a load of bullshit, and you know it.”
Benji stepped closer to me. “He needs to keep his head in the game, not lost in the clouds thinking about getting your ass.”
“I may not go around kicking a ball on a field, but I know about focus,” I snapped back, trying to hide my rising fear. “About having to have my head in the right space every time I have to perform in front of hundreds or thousands of people. And having someone there, at your side who cares about you. That is never a distraction. Never belittle the work that Paxon has put into soccer.”
Benji’s lip curled up in disgust. “You really are only just a whore.” His cold words felt like a slap, and I flinched. Enjoying my reaction, he grinned, flashing teeth before turning and disappearing into the living room where everyone was dancing.
Once he was out of sight, I blew out a breath, shuddering as the fear loosened and the feeling of ickiness crawling over my skin faded away. I glanced around, suddenly the garbage grating on my nerves. I dug out another garbage bag and began shoving everything inside, using it to distract myself.
Benji left me feeling peeled back. I drew in a breath, my throat trying to close. I pushed it out, imagining my lungs clearing of all the bad, all the fear, all the negative. Repeated it over and over until my nerves calmed down.
I knew this was a bad idea. I literally had a panic attack this morning thinking about this party and how many people I was going to be around. Again, my nerves skyrocketed as I thought about all the masked people in the space around me. They were closing in on me, reaching for me, ready to grab me.
They tried last week when they were assaulting me. And they’d try again. People touching me, doing things to me I didn’t want.
I gasped as I was once again in the darkness, unable to move. I wheezed as hands grabbed at me. Touched me.
“Cadence?”
I jumped, yanking back. Stumbling, I hit the countertop. The sharp pain broke me from the darkness. Breathing heavily, I met Seth’s concerned, dark gaze.
“What’s wrong? Are you okay?”
“Just give me a moment.” I drew in a shaky breath and released it slowly.
“Here.” Seth held a glass cup of water in my face.
I stared at it, at the crystal clearness of it.
“It’s only water. It won’t bite you.”
Forcing out a smile, I grabbed it and took a refreshing drink of the cool water. “Thanks.”
“That’s what I’m here for. You don’t need to do anything alone.”
Unable to help myself, I smiled. “I know. I know that now.” I met his gaze. “I have people with me now, right.”
He leaned over and kissed my cheek. “You’re damn right. Now come on. I guess Toby put together a little Halloween trick he wants everyone to see.”
“That can’t be good.”
