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“I hadn’t, to be honest,” I replied. “I miss you.”
“I miss you too, kiddo. You two get your love all settled, and then how about us four meet up?” he suggested.
“So, I’m hearing you giving me a green light?”
“You don’t need my green lights. Try listening to yourself for once,” he advised.
I laughed out loud. “Funny you say that,” I said. “Another friend said the same thing last week.”
“Had you told Cole you loved him when said friend advised the same?”
“No,” I answered.
“Well, isn’t that an interesting fact? Sounds like you already started listening to you. I vote for that plan.”
“I love you.”
“And I love you,” he said. “And one more thing. I like Cole Hicks quite a bit actually. He was a wonderful friend to me and Jack—Jack especially—and he was a faithful man who sadly lost at love. Sound like anyone you might know?”
“I hear you,” I agreed, taking a moment to contemplate something before saying it out loud. “Cole’s different, you know? Very confident, put together, and well-spoken. Amazing to look at too, but there’s something else. I don’t know what exactly, but it seems like hurt in his eyes. And oddly enough,” I added. “I’m not sure I want to try to fix it or share it with him. I simply want to love him. Never had that thought before.”
“Holy smokes. Listen to you! Did you grow up overnight?” he asked. “So don’t try fixing Cole. How about just love him like you said? That should go far in fixing him.”
I laughed at his observation and noticed a small boy being led by his mother across the beach. The child was practically being dragged across the sand after trying to run off, but he was smiling and laughing, looking around at all the action nearby, oblivious to being protected. It wasn’t hard to see me in the child. I’d been blessed with loving parents who’d supported my free-spirit-mindedness. He was me, such a short time ago.
“I’m realizing I’m a man, Perry. Suddenly, and without warning, here I am, a man,” I mused. “A man at a crossroads, no less. How’d this happen?”
“The whole circle of life, my friend,” he responded. “Do me a favor, though.” I made a noise indicating I wanted to hear his favor. “Grow up if you must, Chad, but stay the wondrous, searching, beautiful soul that you are.”
His loving words reminded me of the day I’d first met him. I was drawn to him immediately, yet knew he wasn’t for me. “You ever wonder how it was possible that we didn’t end up together?” I asked, surprised I’d asked the question out loud.
“A thousand times for sure,” he said, his voice so full of fun and love. “I never doubted that there was a reason. And remember, Chad. It was you who knew we weren’t destiny even back then.”
“Jack told me,” I said, lowering my voice whenever I spoke of him lately.
“Perhaps Jack also recognizes that you’ve grown up?”
I watched as a handsome man, maybe in his thirties, greeted the woman and boy. The man lifted the boy in his arms and kissed him smack on the forehead before tossing him high in the air. I felt a warmth enter me and make its way to my heart. That little boy was safe.
“Jack’s here, Perry,” I whispered. “Right in front of me.”
CHAPTER FORTY-SIX: Cole
After five minutes of nonstop yakking about life with Chad, Marla had had enough and cut me off. “Listen to you, Cole,” she interrupted. “Take a breath and let me give you my first impressions.”
“Sorry,” I muttered. “Too much this early in the day? If it helps, it’s miserable out. Loads of clouds and the ocean is a roiling soup of grayness,” I added.
She giggled at my weather report before sighing. “I love you, silly butt. You know that? All I was going to say was that you sound like an entirely different man this past month.”
“I feel like one,” I admitted. “Almost like a lead blanket of misery was lifted off of me.”
“Well, some kinda shit has lifted, or disappeared, I’m not sure which, but you sound like the man I met years ago,” she stated. “It’s frickin’ uncanny listening to you now. You reminded me of something.”
“Hang on a sec,” I said.
I noticed the Wall Street Journal getting soaked on the front patio through the kitchen window near where I was refilling my coffee, so I quickly ran out to grab it, nearly slipping on my ass in my flip-flops. “God! The weather is awful here,” I said, slamming the front door shut. “How’s New York, sweetie?”
“Well,” she began. “Funny you asked.”
