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He nods. "Yes, sir."
Lee gives him a saucy wink. "Show me the proof of your daily task, and it better fucking be interesting."
The recruit digs through his clothes on the floor for his phone, opens it, and shoves it at Lee. I lean over his shoulder and look down at the pictures. They each had to fuck five different people today and get proof to be admitted to the initiation.
Lee nods as he scrolls through the photos. "At least you've been thorough, asshole. Your shots are done. Let's go start your run."
Lee signals to Aries, who is monitoring the recruits on the floor still drinking. Seb stands and precedes Lee out the door. The recruit follows them, and I come up behind. A brisk wind howls outside, and the recruit immediately starts shivering as I clutch my fleece tighter around my shoulders and shove my hands into the pockets.
"Get on with it, fuckface. I don't want to get frostbite waiting for you."
Now that football season is over, we start the initiation process for the new recruits. Those who will take over in the coming years as Lee, Seb, and I graduate. It’s slim pickings at this point, but someone’s bound to have the balls to take over.
I stop next to Sebastian on the starting line, but like I anticipated, he doesn't even spare me a glance. Not until I snatch the bottle of top-shelf vodka from his grasp. Physically, he’s here, but mentally, I know he’s off in some faraway land, probably plotting my demise.
His eyes shoot to mine and narrow. "Fuck off," he says, low and menacing.
It's not even in the same tone he used to tell me to fuck off in. This tone promises a fight if I push him. And if I’m being honest, I've had just enough alcohol to fucking push him.
In fact, a fight is exactly what I need, because anything would be better than this painful reminder of what I did to Bel, of how I hurt her.
"Where is she?" I question confidently. There’s no point in beating around the push. He knows that I want her, that I’m dying to see even a glimpse of her sunshine blond hair.
He snatches the vodka back, holding it in one hand, his other shoved into his black dress pants. As always, he's dressed like he's about to hit the stock market floor. If I had to guess, I’d say Sebastian really wants to punch me in the face, and maybe that’s why he has his hand buried deep in his pocket. To stop himself from giving in to the impulse.
"Perhaps you’re deaf. I said fuck. Off."
I step closer, my breath fogging the night air. "Not deaf, buddy, just not listening to your bullshit. She hasn't returned to school for nearly a month. Her academics are important to her. When is she coming back?"
There's a crash as one of the recruits stumbles out of the house naked, racing toward the starting line. He zooms right past us. Finally, someone who is just as ready to get out of here as I am.
I focus my attention back on Seb. "Anyway, as we were discussing, you were just about to tell me when Bel planned to return to school?”
His green eyes narrow to slits. "First, why the fuck would I ever tell you? Second, why do you care so much? If my memory stands correct, you made it painfully clear that she is nothing to you. What, now that she's not trailer trash, you think you can have her back? She’s not a fucking toy that you can pass around to your friends.”
A hot wash of rage whips through me. "We both know I didn’t mean anything I said that day. All I was doing was protecting her from my father. You know how he is, and he's got it in his head to make her pay for sullying our name. I wasn’t trying to hurt her. I’m aware that I did, but that wasn’t my objective."
I can see the tightening of his jaw, the way the muscle jumps in the dim moonlight. He doesn’t respond and instead takes a swig of the liquor.
"Hm...joke’s on him. She's fucking higher class than he is now. Karma is a real bitch, isn't she? Was this your daddy’s and your plan? He tell you to kiss and make up, so you can marry Bel instead? Everyone knows he lives off your mom's inheritance, and that he had nothing when he started out."
I clench my hands into tight fists. "I'm not talking about him right now. I want to know when Bel will be back at school."
"That’s Ms. Arturo to you, dickhead."
I let out a slow breath so I don't punch him in the fucking jaw. He’s on my last fucking nerve, and I really don’t want to destroy his face. "No, she's my wallflower, and you fucking know it. I'm not going anywhere, and I’m not giving her up."
He smirks. "Hmm...I think you already gave her up. As for when she comes back to school… Let's just say she's waiting for her stitches to heal. The stitches that she had to get after you pushed her and caused her to hit her head. Remember that?"
My stomach cramps. I close my eyes against the image of her falling, of the blood dripping onto the floor. The horror in her eyes, the pain and fear. I did that to her, and I’ll never truly forgive myself. I’ll spend every day making it up to her if she gives me the chance.
"That was an accident."
"Was calling her white trash an accident too? Because you know what they say about emotional and physical abuse. Physical wounds heal, but it’s the emotional wounds that stay with you forever. I wonder how long it’ll take for her to heal?”
Another recruit stumbles down the steps of the main house, across the sidewalk, and onto the grass. His glassy eyes barely register us as he races across the line. Being the asshole he is, Sebastian kicks him in his bare flank, sending him stumbling but not fully down. We watch him run until he disappears down the small hill.
Needing a minute to fight back the slowly rising guilt and revulsion of how thoroughly fucked up I am for still wanting her, I turn and walk back into the house.
