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"I remember like it happened yesterday," Teagan said. "We had to give Samuel back to that monster. He cried and clung to me, begging me not to make him go back. Three days later, we got the news. Samuel had died from internal injuries at the children's hospital." Teagan had never said those words out loud. Her body shook as the memories poured over her. "I have never felt so helpless, so incredibly angry. I wanted to hurt someone. I. wanted to track down the police detective who had done this and accuse him of murder. In my eyes, it was he who had committed the crime." Teagan ran her hands through her hair before scrubbing them over her face. She turned to look at her sister. Ro had tears streaming down hers.
"That poor boy," Ro said. "And you. Poor, sweet, Teagan. How devastating that must have been."
"I went to my school counselor, the only positive role model I had at the time, and cried my eyes out. She asked me if I had considered working with children like Samuel, in his memory. I didn't want to work with the children. I wanted to prevent children from being abused, and I wanted to nail their abusers."
"That's how you became a detective?"
"I made a goal for myself. I wanted to work as a detective in the Special Victims Unit as a Crimes Against Children Investigator. You don't just join the department and then get a spot. It was a lot of work. I went to college, obtained my bachelor's degree, and while working patrol, my master's degree. I volunteered a lot. I worked with Court Appointed Special Advocates, giving one child a voice at a time. I didn't grow up believing most people were good, Ro. I grew up believing most people were bad." Teagan sighed. She had wished she could have been adopted into a loving family, like Ro and Evie, but then again, if she had, would she be doing the work she was doing now?
"I wish I could take it all away, Tea," Ro said, placing her hand gently on Teagan's arm. "If I had a time machine and I could only use it one time, I would use it to go back and fix it for you. I'd snatch you up and place you in the arms of a loving couple."
"I'm not sure I would want it all taken away," Teagan countered. This mind reading trick the triplets had was still hard to get used to. "I mean, don't get me wrong, I would do anything to have prevented Samuel's pain and death. But I wouldn't want to have all of my childhood taken away. It's because of the pain I endured that I am now able to channel that into helping abused women and children."
"Women?" Ro asked. "I thought you were a Crimes Against Children Investigator."
"Sure, but SVU does a lot more than child cases, and sometimes I am called to investigate things like domestic violence. I've learned so much about the topic. I used to judge women who stayed with their abusers. Like, why don't you just leave the asshole? It can't be that hard!"
"Right? I was thinking the same thing," Ro agreed.
"But I've learned that it isn't that easy. Most abusers hide the evidence of their crimes. They control their victims, taking away their freedoms. The abuser often controls finances, friendships, and even the amount of time the victim can see their family. Victims are often embarrassed by the abuse. They are gas lighted into believing it's their fault—if they had just not acted this way or said that. They are so brainwashed that sometimes it takes an intervention from those who love them to help them see the truth. Their self-worth is normally at a zero from the abuser's manipulation."
Ro's eyes dropped to the pillow she still held. "Do victims often swear people to secrecy about the abuse?"
Ro's question had Teagan's spidery sense crawling. After years as an investigator, she could easily read body cues and tone. "Sometimes," Teagan said. "In the rare cases, someone sees the evidence. Most of the time, they make up excuses, like they fell down the stairs. If someone suspects and asks, they might swear them to secrecy." Teagan watched Ro's face closely. Ro's eyebrows were scrunched together, her lips tightened. She tapped her hand absently on her thigh.
"I see," Ro finally said. "What happens when a victim finally gets the courage to leave the abuser?"
"The most dangerous time for a domestic violence victim is when she decides to leave," Teagan said. "When a domestic violence perpetrator loses control, they become unpredictable. A lot of times, they will start to stalk and attack the survivor. Most domestic violence deaths occur when a woman gets the courage to leave."
"Fuck," Ro muttered, just loud enough for Teagan to hear.
"Rowena Gypsy," Teagan began and took both of Ro's hands in hers. "Look at me, right now!" Once Ro met Teagan's eyes, she continued. "Is Octavius abusing you?"
"What?" Ro's mouth dropped open in shock. "Octavius? Abuse me? Never! I mean, sure he spanks me from time to time when I've been naughty, but abuse me? Not on his life. I'd kill him." Relief flowed through Teagan and she felt her shoulders relax. She hadn't pegged him as an abuser, so she was glad her instincts were still working.
"There's no hope, then? For a woman who wants to leave an abuser?" Ro prodded.
"There is always hope. There just needs to be a solid safety plan in place. Many women leave their abusers and start happy, healthy lives. They really need a good support system to help them. Who is being abused, Ro?"
"Well, like you said, there are lots of women out there who get abused every day. What makes you think I'm thinking of anyone specific?" Ro avoided Teagan's interrogative gaze.
"You are a terrible liar."
"I'm not lying."
"She swore me to secrecy, Tea." Ro's tone told Teagan exactly to whom she was referring.
"Three guesses?"
"Huh?"
"You won't be breaking your promise if I guess who told you."
"True!" Ro's face lit up. "Okay, three guesses."
"Is it someone who looks just like us?"
"Yes!"
