Page 49 of The Pain We Nurture


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Give it to me, he growled inside his head yet he forced himself to stay silent. He had to give her tonight, just one night.

Olivia's fingers cramped, clawed tightly around the box. He stayed silent, their battle of wills playing out uncomfortably in the space of his closet. The air thickened in a tense inferno around them as they silently pulled against one another. She tensed further, and he knew her arm had to burn with the strain of how hard her arm was visibly locking up.

He bit back a growl, irritated, because she’d been pressing the damn thing to her for over an hour with the arm he knew hurt her.

Eyes on hers, Colin suddenly flicked his hand and easily ripped the top of the shoebox off, ignoring her little groan and her tightening her lips. Looking down into the box, he stilled, before his body as well as his erection stiffened to its fullest extent.

Money, and not just any money. Her money, stuffed neatly in a janky ass shoe box.

Colin groaned, feeling a muscle tick in his jaw. He let out a long exhale, the air puffing out between them, and ruffling the red hair laying against her breast. She watched with a miserable expression on her face as one of the hundred-dollar bills fell over onto its face.

Hundreds of dollars of bills nestled neatly on their side dominated the small box.

I don’t want this shit in my house. I don’t know or care if you fucked for it. Killed for it. Drowned babies for it. Stole it. I didn’t give it to you so you can’t have it. You’re done with this. And if I could reach inside your head and rip out every memory of you fucking yourself up for it I would. So, you can’t spend it because it’ll make you think of what you had to do to earn it and you’re so done with that lifestyle baby you may as well forget you even had a life before me. I’M the prize, your reward. Every fucking step you’ve taken in your life has led you to me, he thought.

Everything he wanted to say to her he kept to himself, as he made the decision to maybe take one step back in their fledging trust, in order to teach her a valuable lesson regarding his personality.

He could show her, better than he could ever tell her. The first lesson in pain would be tonight after all.

Colin’s eyes flickered up to hers and crinkled. He slowly reached into the box and pulled out a hundred-dollar bill that he held in the air between them. Carefully observing her watching his movements, he tore it up into pieces in front of her. Ignoring her visceral reaction to the audible rip.

"No!" she half whispered.

Olivia whined and placed the back of her free hand over her mouth, her eyes impossibly wide and looking at him, her expression slightly horrified. She lowered her hand quickly before he could reach in and grab another one. Her fingers spread wide over the money and she bowed her body slightly over it, trying to keep him from grabbing more.

"No Colin," she gritted her voice thick with emotion. "You don't know what I had to do-please stop. Don't do this!" she whispered, trying to back away, but she was trapped against the island.

She let out a yelp as his hand suddenly grabbed her jaw hard and jerked her head up. His eyes flashed dangerously at her.

"Remove your hand or you will get your first punishment tonight," Colin said, his face hard and impassive as he looked at her.

Olivia shook her head, tears welling in her eyes. He remained unmoved, unwilling to be manipulated, no matter how fairly.

"Colin," she whined, pulling her lip between her teeth as she implored to him with her eyes. A tear clung to the edge of her eyelash.

Please, she mouthed. Closing her eyes at his slight head shake no, she let out a sob, removing her hand slowly. She stared at his chest again, refusing to meet his eyes.

"I want you to think about whatever the hell you did for this money, and with every rip I want you to let it disconnect you from whatever the fuck you had to do to earn it," Colin said in a hard voice. The rip sounded out between them loudly as he tore another bill up, before grasping another.

Obediently, Olivia thought about the two weeks of torture she just put herself through. Her arm throbbed painfully as image after image of the sick stuff she had to do for that money flitted through her head, accompanied by a loud rip.

She was left reeling, feeling like with every tearing sound she heard she felt less and less tethered to the life she'd led just that morning. She let out another pained sob, somehow keeping the tears from falling.

Colin spent the next ten minutes grasping individual bill after bill, only stopping to roll his neck slightly and take a deep drink of his wine. He groaned contentedly and leaned forward to place his lips on the side of her neck. Giving her a wet kiss there followed by a lewd lick that made goosebumps break out on her body.

He proceeded to slowly rip up every bill one by one that was in the box until they were both standing in a confetti made of money. With a small shocked, and defeated sound, she let the empty box fall from her hands. They stared at each other for another tense minute, the tension almost unbearable in the room.

“Got it?“ he asked softly.

Olivia swallowed and nodded. She was too shocked to respond with anything else.

“Do you mind if I take a shower now?” her voice came out hollow, half-turning toward the closet door and waiting.

He looked at her over the rim of his wine glass.

“It’s not time to beg yet, Olivia. You don’t have to ask for those things. There would only be one reason I wouldn’t want you to take a shower. Of course, you can take a shower... or a bath, even. That might be better for your shoulder,” Colin said softly, observing her closely as she was unconsciously pressing into her arm.

She gave him a slightly bewildered look, ignoring his comment. Thinking of how long it’d been since she had a proper bath. He led her out of the pile of money and into the bathroom. She then frowned, reluctantly looking at him once more.

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