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“Hey!” Cayden picks up on the first ring, shock and hope stirring his voice.
I pick up my glass and down half of it in one gulp before wiping my lips with the back of my hand. “You’re an absolute motherfucker. A total piece of shit. I will never forgive you.” Even as I’m mentally thanking him. If he hadn’t fucked Liz, I wouldn’t be here with Katy. Even if she’s not mine and never will be.
We’re pregnant. I’m going to be a father. My mother is going to be a grandmother. That’s what I need to focus on. Not the way my heart feels like it’s been run over a cheese grater.
The bartender throws me an eye as if to say, that’s not what I meant, and I finish off my glass, pointing to it for him to refill it. He quickly does and then sets the bottle on the ledge behind the bar and goes over to help someone else down the other end.
“I know,” Cayden says solemnly. “I am a motherfucker, and I don’t deserve your forgiveness. I’m sorry, Ben. So fucking sorry.”
I rest my forehead in my hand and stare down at my glass as I press the phone to my ear. “She’s pregnant.”
“What?! Liz is pregnant?”
I roll my eyes and take another sip, savoring the smooth flavor and warmth filling my stomach and veins. “No. Seriously? Are you that stupid? Katy is, you fuckass.”
“Oh.” He clears his throat, almost in what sounds like relief. “Okay.” I hear him moving in the background. “Right. You’re in love with Katy and I’m in love with Liz, so that’s just how my brain worked. How do you feel about that? Katy, I mean. Forget Liz.”
I already have. “How do you think I feel? The woman I love is pregnant with my kid.”
He chuckles under his breath as muted sounds flow around him. “Ah, so you finally admit it.”
“She doesn’t love me back.”
The bartender refills my glass even though I didn’t ask him to. He gives me a look like he wants to say something but doesn’t know what, other than, “You know, I totally didn’t peg you as straight. Not with that curly hair, those blue eyes, and that dimpled chin despite your rugged features.”
I shrug. “As long as you don’t peg me, I don’t care.”
He belts out a laugh, and so does Cayden. “Shame. It’s always the pretty ones who are the least available.”
“I think that was the best joke you’ve ever made,” Cayden says in my ear.
“That was a total Katy joke,” I tell him before going back to the bartender. The hollow space around my heart grows, and I crumble. “Just keep them coming.”
“Are you driving?”
I shake my head. “I live up the street.”
“Then I’ll keep them coming,” he promises and leaves me again.
I’m a mess.
“I’m hanging up on you now,” I inform Cayden. “I just wanted you to know that you’re a motherfucker and I hate you.”
Movement on my left stirs me, I stare blankly at Cayden as he pulls out the stool and slides casually into it. I hit the end button on my phone and set it down, annoyed he’s here. He points to my drink and flashes the bartender two fingers.
“What the fuck are you still doing in Boston?”
He doesn’t look at me as he lifts his glass and takes a sip. “I never left. I’m renting a place two blocks away from your house.”
“Why?”
“Because I came here for you. I couldn’t go until you forgave me or at least spoke to me again.”
“Baby, if he doesn’t take you back after a declaration like that, I will.” The bartender has his hand over his heart, his eyes big and round and full of swoon.
“He fucked my ex-wife behind my back for two years and then hit on my new girlfriend.”
The bartender’s face sours. “Oh. Straight too, huh? And a cheater. Bitch, you can pour your own drink next time.”
