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The tightness in my chest expands, a growing warmth. I set down my coffee and close the distance between us in two strides. Cupping her face in my hands, I tilt it up toward me. Her eyes search mine, trusting and vulnerable.
“Me too, beautiful,” I murmur. “Me too.”
A sharp rap at the door breaks the spell. I tense immediately, instincts shifting into high gear as I turn toward the sound. Cedara’s palm finds the small of my back as if silently looking for reassurance. I lift a hand, urging her to stay behind me, then move to the door. I crack it open a few inches to reveal Sybil standing outside.
“Good morning,” she greets us cheerily. “I was hoping I could steal Cedara away for a bit of girl time?”
Cedara’s fingers curl into the fabric of my shirt. “Barrett should stay,” she says firmly.
Sybil’s eyes shift to me. “If that’s what you want, baby.” She steps further into the house. “Did you sleep well? How are you feeling today?”
“Much better. Thank you.” Cedara clasps her hands in front of her. “I…um, I just made breakfast. Would you like to join us?”
“Sounds great,” Sybil says brightly. If she’s aware of the tension, she gives no sign of it as she heads toward the small dining alcove near the kitchen.
“I’ll get everything out,” I say, hoping to give them a moment alone together.
I busy myself in the kitchen, giving them some privacy while staying within earshot. Cedara’s voice drifts out, hesitant and subdued.
“I’m sorry about last night, Mom. I didn’t mean to scare you.”
“Oh, sweetheart.” Sybil’s tone is soothing, full of warmth. “You have nothing to apologize for. We all understand this is…difficult.”
There’s a pause, a weighted silence that stretches out. I can picture Cedara worrying her lower lip between her teeth the way she does when she’s anxious.
“I felt so out of control,” she admits in a small voice. “Like I was a monster.”
There’s that word again. I don’t like it. Not one bit.
“You’re not a monster, baby.” The words are fierce, full of conviction. “You’re my beautiful, brave girl. We’re going to figure this out together, okay?”
I let out a slow breath; hearing the anguish in Cedara’s voice tears me up inside. The clink of dishes breaks the heavy quiet as I portion out the food. I carry the loaded plates into the dining area, offering Sybil a small smile as I set them down.
“Everything looks delicious,” she says warmly. “Thank you, Barrett.”
Cedara doesn’t meet my gaze, but her shoulders lose some of their rigid tension as I move close. We settle around the table, the only sounds the scrape of utensils against ceramic as we eat. An awkward silence hangs over us.
Sybil clears her throat eventually. “Well, this was lovely, but I should get going. Cedara, will I see you later?”
Cedara nods, finally lifting her eyes to her mother’s face. “Of course.”
Sybil rises and leans down to press a kiss to the top of her daughter’s head. “I love you, baby.”
“Love you too, Mom.”
With a last look between Cedara and me, Sybil slips out, leaving us alone with the remnants of our awkward breakfast.
Cedara exhales a deep breath as if she’s been holding it for too long. “I… I think I’m glad she’s gone. God, does that make me awful?” Her voice is choked.
I set my fork down and reach across the table to take her hand in. Her fingers are cold, trembling slightly in my grasp.
“Hey.” I wait until her eyes meet mine before continuing. “You’re not awful, Cedara. Don’t ever think that.”
She opens her mouth, but I squeeze her hand gently to silence her.
“I mean it. What happened last night…that’s not you. Not the real you.” I lift her hand and press my lips to her knuckles. “You’re kind and brave and strong. So damn strong.”
A faint blush warms her cheeks, but the worry line remains etched between her brows. “I was so scared, Barrett. What if I’d hurt someone?”
