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“Too personal?” she asked, quirking a brow.
“Oh, not at all,” he said, waving his hand for her to continue.
“So is it true?”
“Which part?” he asked.
“About the shallow and insipid women.”
“Oh, that’s true,” he said, grinning. “I’m an organized soul at heart. I like a solid plan, and I’ve always had one. College, medical school, residency, and then owning my own practice. Those things all had to be accomplished before I could think of settling down or starting a family.”
“And now?” she asked.
“If you don’t slice while you talk we’ll never get dinner done,” he said.
“You don’t have to tell me,” she said.
“Sure I do,” he said. “Now that I’ve done those things I’m ready for the next part of my plan.”
“So have you inserted yourself into my life because you find me shallow and insipid or because you don’t?”
He hid his smile behind the wine glass, but he knew she could see it in his eyes. “What do you think?”
“I’m not sure I’m comfortable with either answer,” she said. “And maybe we shouldn’t have this conversation while I have a sharp knife in my hand.”
He laughed and then went about wrapping the potatoes in foil. “I’m not sure how I feel about my family telling you all my secrets.”
“I can understand that,” she said, solemnly. “I should have stopped them.”
“Ha,” he said. “I’d have liked to see you try. It doesn’t really bother me. I know they love me and want what’s best for me. And they all think you’re what’s best for me.”
“I don’t understand that.”
“That a family would love someone so much that they wouldn’t think twice about meddling in their business?”
“Yeah,” she said. “I guess so.”
“That’s what families do,” he said, shrugging good-naturedly.
“Maybe so,” she admitted. “But I don’t really have a point of reference. Don’t you get tired of it? You’ve literally got family around every corner. People who have known you since birth and know everything about you. And because of that, they have opinions about your life. Don’t you ever feel…smothered?”
“Not at all,” he said. “You’re the one who mentioned healthy boundaries. My work keeps me busy. And my life after hours is mine to do with as I please. When I want to see my family I show up for Sunday dinners or make a stop into The Lampstand. But for the most part they let me drive the pace. My parents like to send texts just to touch base, and my mother will bring by a home-cooked meal about twice a month so she has an excuse to spend some one-on-one time with me. But I’ve learned how to find my peace.”
She snorted out her skepticism. “If I wrote that book I’d make a fortune.”
“A book on personal peace?” he asked. “Probably so. It’s something everyone wants but few know how to achieve. Especially people like us.”
“What do you mean by that?” she asked.
“You’re an achiever. I am too, so I know where you’re coming from. Achievers tend to keep achieving because they don’t know what peace looks like. When they achieve one thing they immediately look for the next mountain to conquer. But when you stop to be still and let the world go quiet around you—peace will sometimes feel like a chain around your throat.”
She swallowed hard, shaken by what he was saying. It was the truth. She’d set her course for freedom and independence, but maybe what she was really looking for was peace.
“So how do you find it?” she asked.
“Well, I can tell you no amount of achievement can find it,” he said. “It’s being able to stand in the eye of the storm and watch chaos swirl around you, but stay steady and stable in the center. It’s finding that place where your soul is satisfied—where there’s no hurt or sorrow or the dregs of a past that you hold resentment over. It’s when you can release all of those things that you can find true peace.”
She laughed, but the sound was bitter to her ears. “I guess I’m not there yet. It’s one of the reasons I moved to Laurel Valley. I needed to be able to shut the world out—shut it off—and find the quiet of peace. I wanted to be able to put deadlines and alimony payments, or my parents not calling me on my birthday, to the side and just be able to float out in the middle of the lake without a care or worry in the world.”
