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“And what about you?” I hold my breath.
“As long as Leandro keeps buying me magazines, I’ll be fine.”
We both crack up, but it’s laced in sadness.
When Leandro opens the door to check on us, Maria is already stomping up the RV stairs and poking her finger into his rock-hard belly. “Let me see all the vitamins and drugs you bought this poor girl, now.”
Leandro narrows his eyes at her, then does as he’s asked. I hear the pills shaking in their bottles as he gathers them.
Maria gasps when he comes back, then pushes him inside. “No. No. No. No. This one’s okay.” She shakes a bottle in his face. “God. You know I can do more than fix wounds, right?” She hits him in the chest again and marches off.
She winks at me on the way back to the shack, and Leandro just stands at the foot of the RV, dumbfounded at what just transpired.
“That one’s a firecracker when she wants to be, huh?”
“Just looking out for her girl.” My smile is wide. “Speaking of.” I get up from my seat and try the same poking routine with him. “You’re going to give those women a bit more attention. They’re rotting down there. Hey, I’m not messing around. They’re human beings that are here for your vengeance fantasies.” I kiss him on the cheek to tell him I’m not really mad at him, but I am serious.
After a long huff, I take a stroll into the woods. I’ve been doing this thing where I try to forgive the people who’ve wronged me, or may have had an ulterior motive, and instead try to focus on some things they’ve done right.
I kick some sticks out of my path and touch the bark on a few trees, thinking of Leandro banging me hard against one of them. A pleasant shiver runs over my shoulders as I picture his strong hands pushing me down. That man is a god in the proverbial bedroom.
On I go, toward the two little graves I set up with crossed sticks and a few plucked flowers. One for Joey – my awful ex-husband. He beat me, branded me, and died like a dog, but there were moments, however few and far between. Like the one time he picked me in a crowd and told his friends how hot I looked. I know it doesn’t sound like much, but that’s not something a rough-around-the-edges guy does when everyone’s looking.
“I felt like a million bucks that day, Joey.” I put another flower over the grave. “I hope wherever you are, you finally learn to shed all that toxicity you harbored here.”
I turn to the second grave. Arnold’s. He had an ulterior motive for visiting me. It wasn’t just to keep me safe, but also because he wanted something else from me.
“Well, Arnold, we both have ulterior motives it seems. Nobody’s perfect. I come here today to make peace with myself and beg your forgiveness. You didn’t deserve to die. And I hope this baby growing inside me knows that I’m not rotten like that onion I pulled in the store months ago.”
“You’re anything but—”
I jump in place and screech like an idiot. “Leandro, what in God’s name!”
He slips out from behind a tree and stands beside me. “This is good.” He looks at the graves. “Catharsis is something we all yearn for, Sia.” He drapes an arm over my shoulder.
My heart is still skipping beats from being scared out of my own skin. “Can you not?” I hit him, and he cackles.
“Sorry about the meds. Thought I was doing the right thing.”
I giggle at him.
“What’s funny?” he growls.
“It’s hilarious to see you bad at something,” I admit.
“Fuck off.” He grins.
The spring breeze carries with it all the freshness of the outdoors. It smells like maple, and grass, and the end of winter. For all I know, it might be the last time I truly experience joy. Leandro and I both know what’s coming.
“Tomorrow, we prepare,” he says, as if reading my mind. “Donny delivered the attire this morning.”
“You saw the boss?” I try to mask my nerves.
“At a diner, five a.m., two hours out,” he replies. “You sleep like a rock these days. Usually you’d be up and by my side.”
I tighten my lips.
“You snore too,” he says, and my nostrils flare.
