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Try as I might not to wake Shayla, she stirs when I slide in behind her and drape my arm over her waist. My cock twitches when I realize she must have taken her leggings off before she laid down for her nap since she’s only wearing panties from the waist down. Too bad I can’t see what color they are.
I angle my hips back when what I really want to do is press them forward and nestle my cock between her cheeks. But then she wiggles her ass as she stretches and yawns, rubbing up against my hard dick, and I can’t bite back the moan of pleasure she pulls out of me so easily. She rolls her hips, grinding against my lap, and my hips jerk forward on their own. I curse under my breath when she gasps and sits up straight, scooting away until her back hits the headboard.
“Oh my god, what time is it?” She looks around wildly, her eyes darting to the darkened windows and then to the digital clock on my nightstand. “You were supposed to wake me up after an hour!” she whisper-shouts.
I rub my hands over my face, then sit up, sliding back against the headboard beside her. “I did wake you up. You told me, quite literally, to fuck off, or you’ll throat punch me if I try waking you up again.”
“I did not!”
“Oh, yes, you most certainly did. Then you told me you’d never, and I quote, suck my huge cock again if I didn’t leave you alone when I tried waking you up an hour after that. I couldn’t risk it,” I chuckle as if it were a joke, though, in all seriousness, I hope and pray Shayla will, in fact, wrap her soft pink lips around my cock again in the future.
“Oh my god. I’m the worst.” She rubs the sleep from her eyes, trying to wake herself up, then picks up the baby monitor. Lainey turns her head to the other side, and I silently pray that she won’t interrupt us again. I blow out a breath, thankful she settles back to sleep.
“You could never be the worst,” I whisper when she sets the baby monitor down on the nightstand and slumps back. “You’re the best, actually.” That last part comes out even lower.
We’re both quiet for several minutes, and I wonder if she heard me. But then she turns to face me, and I hold my breath. She stares at me silently for a long time, her brows creased. I place my hand on her knee over the covers and slide it slowly up her leg. She watches it, then darts her eyes back to my face when I gently squeeze her upper thigh.
She frowns and shifts her leg away. “We need to talk,” she says, and my stomach drops, despair already sinking in. “We can’t—what happened this morning can’t happen again. I’m only eighteen, and I have college and Lainey to think about, and…” She shifts farther away as she goes quiet again.
Nausea churns in my stomach as I pull my hand back. This is it. Shayla is going to break my heart. She’s going to tell me that whatever this is between us is over, and I…I can’t face her. I roll my lips and bite down hard on them, then twist to swing my legs over the side of the bed with my back to her.
I try to blink back the hot tears that well up and spill over, surprised by just how quickly they’ve formed. I’m not the kind of man who thinks it’s weak for men to show their emotions or other such bullshit, and she’s seen me cry before, but I’m still not the kind who does it so easily. But this pain, it’s too much, and I clutch my chest.
“I’m sorry,” I say with a croak when I stand, then clear my throat, hoping she can’t hear the pain of my breaking heart in my voice. “If that’s what you want, I’ll respect your decision. I’ll, um, go get your textbook if you still want help studying?” I ask with the hope that she’ll stay, that this isn’t the end of our time together. But when she doesn’t respond, I offer dejectedly, “I’ll help you pack up if you’d rather go home.”
I pull on a clean T-shirt from my closet and make my way to the living room to look for her backpack. Except I need a minute to collect myself and lift my shirt to wipe under my eyes.
“James,” Shayla whispers a second before I feel her small hands slide around my waist to palm my stomach as she hugs me from behind, her soft breasts pressed against my back.
Her touch is so soothing, so intoxicating. My skin heats under her palms. My abs clench, and my heart flutters with new hope that she’ll forgive me for being forward with her in bed, that this won’t be the end of us.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper. “I shouldn’t have touched you earlier. I promise I won’t do it again if that’s what you want.” I plead softly, “Just please don’t go.”
“James…” She says my name differently this time, almost like an admonishment. She sighs heavily and drops her hands, leaving me feeling cold all over.
Fuck, this really is the end. The thought of never getting to see, hug, cuddle, or sleep next to her again is devastating. I bite my fist and choke back a sob. I don’t want her to think I’m a toxic man trying to manipulate her with my tears into staying or being with me. She’s only eighteen, as she reminded me, planning a whole future ahead of her that shouldn’t include me. Won’t include me.
I have to clear my throat twice before I can say over my shoulder, “I’ll walk you home. Um, you grab Lainey, and I’ll get your things together.”
I can’t face her as I step away and pack up Lainey’s diaper bag with some of her toys that I had left in a pile on the activity mat. I find Lainey’s favorite stuffed kitten on the couch and stroke the orange fur.
I bought the kitten for her the first time they went with me to the store to get diapers for Grayson. Her big, gray eyes lit up when she saw it on the shelf, and when I handed it to her, she hugged it tightly with her chubby arms and squealed. Her little chin quivered, and she wouldn’t let it go when Shayla tried to put it back on the shelf, so I bought it for her just to see her smile again.
A thought nearly bowls me over. If Shayla takes Angelainey home and decides to quit, we’ll go back to being strangers. She’s so young that she won’t remember who I am when she grows up. I won’t even get to see her grow up, except from afar. My little Angelainey won’t be mine anymore.
Fuck, fuck, fuck, I’ve made a mess of things. I should have been content just having them in my life, but then I had to go and take things too far. Got too attached. Too obsessed. Took advantage of Shayla and the comfort she offered, then scared her off by wanting more. The sob I bit back earlier finally works its way out as I place Angelainey’s kitten in her diaper bag.
“James, you didn’t let me finish.” She takes the stuffed kitten out of the bag and places it back on the couch before coming to stand in front of me. She reaches up and combs my hair back with her fingertips, and when a fresh tear rolls down my cheek, she wipes it away with her thumb. “You really should have let me finish.”
Then her hands are around my neck, her body flush against the length of mine as she stands on the tips of her toes and pulls me down to kiss her.
Instantly, euphoria sweeps through me, erasing my earlier devastation. I wrap my arms around her, my large hands spanning her back as I hold her as close as I can and deepen the kiss.
I can’t believe it. Can’t believe Shayla is kissing me with such fervor, thrusting her tongue in my mouth as I slide mine along hers. I don’t know what’s happening, what’s changed, but I’ll take anything and everything she’s willing to give me and nothing more.
“Angel. My angel.” I breathe out her name with devotion and kiss her lips, then her jaw, and down the side of her long neck.
She fists my hair and tips her head back, giving me more access to kiss and nip the length of her throat as I slide my hands down to grip her ass and yank her hips closer to mine.
