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“Oh no, she’s my daughter,” I correct. I almost said our daughter, but I’m not sure how James would react to that just yet. I’m not sure how I would react to saying that out loud, either.
Mara snorts, though the guys must miss it because none of them look her way. I do, though, and I notice she’s not cooing over Grayson anymore as she looks me up and down. Judging by the sour look on her face, one that she instantly drops when James looks her way again, I get the distinct feeling she was only putting on a show for James’s benefit before.
Just one of the guys, my ass.
“What’s this?” Martin asks as he picks up my open history book that I left on the coffee table and flips it so he can see the cover. His voice really is sexy as hell, though I internally scold myself for having that thought. I’m sure women swoon over him whenever he speaks, though it personally does nothing for me, not when I have James and the sinfully sexy words he whispered in my ear last night.
“Oh, do you go to Lone Star?” Isaiah asks as he takes the book from Martin and thumbs through it. “I went there for my first two years. Professor Hardwick was a hardass, but the class was good. Though, I don’t remember this textbook. Must have switched to a new one after I left.”
“No, I’m a senior at Calhoun, but I might go to LSCC after I graduate.”
Isaiah raises his eyebrows again, which makes me think James hasn’t told them much about me, like how old I am, for starters. I chew the inside of my cheek, suddenly unsure of myself, and want to pull James aside to ask him if he’s told them we’re together. But just then, the timer on the oven starts beeping, and he leads the guys into the kitchen.
I’m about to follow on their heels when Mara asks, “Calhoun High School?” She laughs and shakes her head when I nod. “So you got pregnant at what? Sixteen or seventeen?” It seems to be a rhetorical question since she snorts before I can respond and mutters under her breath, “Figures.”
Before I can ask her what the hell she means by that, she hurries out of the room toward the kitchen with Grayson, still laughing, and that does it for me. I’ve only known her for less than fifteen minutes, and she’s already solidified her spot in my book as a mean girl.
A scary thought sinks its claws in my stomach—what if her opinion of me colors the way James sees me? He was offended by how his family treated me, stood up to Tyler for me, and made the very big, very serious proclamation that Lainey is his. But what if, after tonight, he regrets moving so fast? What if he regrets what he said about Lainey?
No, no. I trust James. Trust that his feelings for me and my daughter are genuine and won’t be derailed by one person’s low opinion, no matter how close he and Mara are. I take a minute to give myself a little pep-talk—I’ve got this. I’ve dealt with girls like her before, and I can do it again—then try on a smile as I finally make my way into the kitchen.
They’re all sitting at the table in the breakfast nook with full plates of food. Martin and Isaiah make a big deal about how good my baked ham and cheese sliders are. My mood lifts as they fawn over the spread James and I have put out—homemade spinach artichoke dip, the sliders they’re scarfing down, bacon cheddar potato skins, plus the wings James picked up from a nearby restaurant.
“It’s official, James. You have to hire her for every game night from now on. Pizza and beer just won’t cut it after this,” Isaiah jokes before popping another potato skin into his mouth.
“Well, we still have beer. What can I get you?” I rattle off a list of the IPAs we bought, as well as the regular twelve-pack James says he typically buys. I pop the bottle caps off and pass them out, accepting their warm thanks.
James smiles when I hand him his IPA while he bounces Lainey on his knee and eats one-handed. He switches between taking a bite, then handing her little bits of his food for her to try. I catch myself halfway to leaning down to kiss his cheek but cover it up by kissing the top of Lainey’s head instead. I don’t want to make things awkward for James, especially with Mara’s attention hyper-fixated on us from where she’s sitting next to him, holding Grayson in another uncomfortable position.
She jumps into the conversation when James turns to say something to me, stealing his attention. “I’m so sorry for not coming over before to help out. You know how busy I’ve been at work. Everyone always needs me on their teams.” She rolls her eyes as if she’s put out by it, but she’s just bragging. She rests her hand on his upper arm and leans into him, her puppy-eyes back in full force. “But really, now that the Krueger project is finished, if you ever need help that you don’t have to pay for”—she looks pointedly at me—“just call. Day or night,” she stresses. “I’m here for you whenever you need me.”
I cringe at her dig about paying for help. It’s true that James still pays me, though I think he would know by now that I’d still be here, happily taking care of him and Grayson, even if he didn’t. Because we’re together, right?
Suddenly, I’m bombarded with a vision of Mara taking my place, of her happily taking care of him and Grayson. I try to shake it off, but I can’t help imagining what people would think if she and James were to go out together. She looks more like Grayson than I do, and people would probably assume she is his mother, which makes me nauseous to think about. He’s mine, I remind myself. Even if we don’t look alike, he’s still mine.
James doesn’t shrug Mara’s hand off, but he does put my mind at ease when he says, “Thanks, but Shayla is all I need. She’s been a godsend, truthfully.”
I take a deep, calming breath and return the smile he gives me. He only needs me, he said so himself, and I relax a fraction, hoping she’ll back down. Mara’s sour expression is back in place, but once again, she hides it when James turns back to the table. I don’t think Isaiah and Martin miss it this time, though, as Martin pinches his lips together, and Isaiah leans back in his chair as he watches Mara.
I’m relieved when Grayson starts fussing, all too happy to pluck him from her hold when he reaches for me. She dusts off her shirt like he was dirty or something, and I shoot her a nasty look, offended on his behalf. Lainey’s head droops against James’s chest, her hands and face covered in cheese.
Since it’s fully dark outside now and well past their bedtime, James stands with Lainey in his arms to help me with their bedtime routine, but I shoo him away. He kisses them both as we say our goodnights while Isaiah empties his backpack, spreading out their game board.
I haul both babies down the hall to give them their baths and can hear James and his friends in the kitchen with the bathroom door cracked open a sliver. They seem to take their game very seriously, but I can’t help but laugh a little at the fake voice James adopts for his character. It’s nice hearing him having such a good time hanging out with his friends, even if Mara happens to be one of them.
It does make me a little sad, almost envious, that I don’t have friends of my own. A few tried to stick by me after I had Lainey, but they eventually fell off. I don’t fault them for it since I wasn’t all that interested in hanging out with anyone if I couldn’t bring Lainey, and I preferred spending my time at home with her.
I think back to Eden and smile inwardly at the possibility of us being friends. I really, really hope we will. She’s close to my age and might end up struggling with the same things I have once she has her baby, especially if Tyler doesn’t stick around, and I’ll be happy to help her through it if she wants me to. Even if she doesn’t want or need my help, we’ll be around each other a lot so our babies can bond as siblings, and hopefully, we’ll form our own bond.
I rock Grayson to sleep as Lainey settles herself in the crib James bought two weekends ago, which matches Grayson’s and replaces her former travel crib. It’s positioned head to head next to Grayson’s on the back wall so the babies can see and babble at each other when they wake up from their naps. It’s so cute seeing them do so through the baby monitor, and it fills my heart with warmth. Siblings.
Once Grayson is just on the verge of falling asleep, I lay him down in his crib. I wait for both to fall asleep completely, then tiptoe my way back to the front of the house. I pop into the kitchen to grab a plate of food that James put aside and kept warm for me, apologizing for interrupting their game when they all look up at the same time.
“They’re staying?” Mara questions with some bewilderment, referring to me and Lainey.
“Yeah, in case Grayson wakes up.” James scratches the back of his neck, though he’s still entirely focused on the gameboard.
My heart squeezes in my chest when I realize that his friends really do think I’m just the babysitter. They don’t know about us, that neither of us can sleep unless we’re together, that Grayson is mine, that I’m not just here in case Grayson wakes up. Which means James doesn’t want them to know, or else he would have told them.
