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“Die?”
“No. I needed to remember what it felt like to live in the moment, not fear death, honor my body’s intuition, and nurture my spirit. And Scottie’s the epitome of those things. I didn’t need her. I needed her light.”
Amelia closes her eyes, more tears breaking free. “I w-want to be h-her. I want to b-be the person w-who helps you live.”
“No, sweetheart.” I kiss her head. “You don’t want to be Scottie. She tragically lost a baby, and she nearly died. You gave us Astrid. And you are the reason I want to live. That. Is. Everything.”
She takes a step back, wiping her face. “I need time.”
After a sigh of surrender, I retrieve my notebook from the closet and hand it to her. “This is what I did every day in Austin. I figured out I could draw. And all I wanted to sketch were things that made me think of you. And the words I wanted to write … well, they were all about you too.” I slide my hands in my pockets. “I’ll give you whatever you need. Time. Space. Anything.”
With a blank expression, she flips through the pages. It hurts that she won’t look at me. Love does that. It hurts. I’m unsure why humans are so obsessed with it, but we are.
CHAPTER FORTY
EVERY END HAS A BEGINNING.
Scottie
I miss my employee,the one who never cashed a single paycheck.
Koen leaves early in the mornings. And mornings are when I have a little extra time since the store doesn’t open until nine. By the time I close the shop in the evenings, he’s walking Scrot and ready to turn in for the night.
I’m missing my two favorite men for different reasons.
The door chimes as I refill the bulk jars with the recent candy order and figure out how to find another employee who will work for free.
“Mr. Drummond.” I smile. “Good to see you.”
The store’s owner gives me a sad smile while slicking back what little gray hair he has left on his head. His eyes are dark and weary, skin wrinkled and dotted with age spots and moles.
“I’m afraid I don’t come with good news. Clara is receiving hospice care. All of my money’s gone out to pay medical bills. I can no longer pay rent for this building.”
“Oh,” I wad up the empty candy bag, “I had no idea she wasn’t doing well.”
He glances around the store as if already appraising what he might liquidate. It’s jarring. This store has felt like my home for the past ten years.
“Her heart is failing.”
“I’m sorry to hear that. Is there anything I can do?”
He shifts his gaze to me, adjusting his giant belt buckle. “You can sell as much of this stuff as possible by the end of the month.”
That’s in two weeks.
“I’ll need to sell the trailer too.”
I nod. Clara has been so kind to me. I’ve loved working here. And I know so many customers will be disappointed too.
“I’d love to visit Clara if that’s okay.”
“Of course. She’s at Wellings.”
“I can be out of the trailer this weekend.”
“I’m sorry, Scottie. I know Clara wanted to keep the store for you. But I just?—”
“Don’t.” I shake my head. “I understand.”
