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“You called me by her name!” he shouts, his ragged voice bouncing off the building.
Eyes wide, I rear back.
A horrible, bitter laugh fills the air. “It’s always about her. Even when she’s dead, it’s all about her. Always has been, always will be with you,” he spits.
I flinch.
“Mason and Izzy,” he growls. “A tragic love story for the ages. I’m so fucking sick of being in the middle of it. I didn’t ask for this!”
If he notices the effect his words are having on me, he doesn’t let it stop him.
Lip curling, he sneers. “Sometimes, I really fucking hate her. You know that?” His voice trembles. “I hate her. And I love her. And I miss her. And I want to grieve her. I want to let her rest, but you won’t let me!”
The sheer devastation that barrels through me at his words…
It rips me apart.
Tear-filled amber eyes sear into mine. “And that makes me hate you. So much.” His words squeeze out from his teeth.
I nod. He should hate me. Not her. Me. I’m the cause of this.
Shoulders hunched, all I can do is keep nodding, and take the verbal beating I suddenly realize has been a long time coming.
Because with each agonized, forced out word from Jeremy’s snarled mouth?—
Jeremy, who’s always struggled to fight back, to let himself feel angry and hurt.
Jeremy, who has never once looked at me like he’s looking at me now, like he really does mean it when he says he hates me.
Jeremy, who’s always looked at me like I was his hero, like someone worthy of his admiration, of his friendship, of his time…
The gravity of my mistakes—of what I’ve put him through for years now—is no longer able to be denied.
It’s fucking crushing.
And it’s everything I deserve and then some.
“I just want to forget,” he wrenches out. “I just want a fucking break from all this shit. Just when I think I’m finally free of you—you pull me back in, and without a fucking care in the world.
“I’m done being dragged down by you.” He throws a hand out. “I’m done living in this ghost town. And I’m done being a stand in for her,” he says, looking right into me, for once letting me see it all.
His pain.
His anger.
Years of agony and spite stored up…
It’s all laid out for me to see.
“I’m done letting you use me to fill some void.”
My eyes fall shut, and I shake my head. No…
It’s not true.
It’s not.
“Hang onto her—hang onto the memories all you want. But I want out. I can’t do it anymore. I don’t want to feel like this anymore.”
