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“But the box of worms…”
“Has led me to the big fish.”
“What about Reese?” He still holds a worried look.
I pull a box of cameras and cords from under the coffee table. I drop them on the ground in front of him. “All hidden cameras and recording devices were removed from her entire apartment.”
“How?” He picks a camera lens up and looks at it.
“Upstairs, the neighbor forgot to turn off their water, which could have caused a leak into her apartment. Maintenance had to check the next few apartments below, including hers, to make sure there were no leaks or damage.” I smile.
“Maintenance? Jesus, who are you?”
“Someone you don’t even know. No one does,” I say. The person I was, died, buried in the village. The person who woke up alone in that hospital bed is a skeleton.
“Is your name even Adam?” He laughs.
I shrug my shoulders. “No matter the name, it will fade into a memory.”
He looks at me a bit more thoroughly and not with anger or vengeful eyes. Relieved eyes that had been begging for release. Standing, he walks himself to the window and looks outside.
I grab the album and walk out the front door. “Follow me.” Motioning to Kevin, I swipe the shovel off the side of the porch and walk into the woods. Making sure we are a good distance away from the cabin. I hand the album back to Kevin. “Hold this.”
I dig a small grave. I noticed Kevin is sweating.
“I will not kill you… not yet at least,” I slightly joke. Once the hole is deep enough for me, I grab the album from Kevin and tenderly lay it in the grave. I climb out and look down.
“They fed us, housed us, gave us their beds when we needed to stay overnight. We protected them when the disgusting, vile men would come to abduct them. They referred to them as traitors, and I called them friends.” I bow my head in respect for the beautiful souls they were. “Rest in peace.”
I push the dirt over to fill the grave. Kevin’s voice surprises me, causing me to stop what I’m doing and listen.
“They promised me a family when I joined the military. Mostly, it was. Incredible brothers and sisters that trained with me. You depend on that person next to you. Die for that person next to you. Doesn’t matter where in the world you are. You train to have each other’s back. I talked about Reese so much that she became a figurative part of our group. All the videos we had were in the room. An extensive family. Reese smiled more, having more people in her corner. When she graduated, every single one of us called and congratulated her. We sent videos and over the summer, everyone visited her. She was a homebody for everyone.”
He wipes away some tears. I notice his demons are not from the souls he took but the fact he did nothing to stop them. No bullet came from his gun, yet he was taunted by the cries for help. Too far gone at that moment, and he knew.
“I am so sorry I couldn’t stop them,” he apologizes to the ground.
I continue to push the dirt over the pictures that fill my memories. Kevin bends over, grasping his knees for support, trying to catch his breath. Whispering “I’m sorry” repeatedly.
I slap his back and pull his shoulders so he can walk back to the cabin. He drags his feet and keeps looking back at the shallow grave of pictures.
When he gets inside, he grabs another beer from the fridge himself. He walks to the basement door and stops and looks over his shoulder. An almost mirror image of Reese.
“She knows nothing that happened. She thought I was seeking help for all this, but I had no one to talk with. Ghost mission that never existed on paper. I signed a nondisclosure agreement, so we would’ve lost everything and then some. I had no one. I had nothing. Her goddamn positive attitude pissed me off more and more. I went to the support group so she wouldn’t worry. To be honest, it made things worse.”
I stare, understanding him a lot more. “She will forgive you. She loves you. You need to tell her some of this though, so she knows how to help you.”
He pops the cap off the beer and chucks the top in the trash before he walks to the basement.
I clean up and walk to my room. Standing in the middle of my room, I strip naked and stare at my scarred body in the full-size mirror that sits in the corner of my room. Eyes closed, I can hear Khalil’s voice quietly hushing me as he rolls me to a corner of the room and covers me with objects. Gunshot wounds, shrapnel metal, and debris from the blast fill my body, but I refuse to die. I am fighting to get up, to save this family. The shock and pain are too much before my body gives in and I pass out. I don’t know how much time passed before I woke up later after being found by the platoon that was relieving us.
Jumbled puzzle pieces I’ve spent years trying to put in place. Half assed stories only lead to the next step in the staircase.
I run my hand over the raised scars, knowing that there is still metal in my body they couldn’t get out without causing more damage. I look down at the tattoos on the inside of my wrist and part of my thigh that covers the self-inflicted wounds.
I hear Khalil’s whispered words, begging me to be quiet and still. I keep telling him to hide behind me. “There isn’t enough room,” he replies.
I close my eyes as the last moments before I pass out are of this ten-year-old and his bravery in saving me.
