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Chapter 17
Collins
After a sleepless night, I decide to gather the courage to talk to Victor. I need to be completely honest to salvage what remains. To start my day off right, I head to the shop to steady my overthinking mind. Just the sight of my girl boots my mood and centers me. She’s my therapist, silently offering the best advice in the world.
Technically, I’m not supposed to be at the shop today, neither is anyone else. The quiet, the smell of oil and metal, and the air is so thick it’s hard to breathe. Maybe it’s just my imagination or my body’s response from yesterday. I just head to my girl and start picking at little things to fix. I spend half my day just adjusting things and getting lost in my thoughts. The sound of a door slamming and cursing brings me back to reality.
I duck further into my car and hide at the bottom, where they can’t see me. When the voices speak, I immediately recognize the person, and my heart shatters for my brother, as this is the one who caused his heartbreak.
“Taylor, you had no business coming here,” Leland yells angrily.
“Leland! I’ve been doing everything I can to get a hold of you!” Taylor yells back.
“There was no reason! I have nothing to say, nothing to hear.”
“Why won’t you just hear me out? I came all this way to tell you I love you and I made a mistake leaving,” Taylor begs. “I thought I could have the life I wanted, but you are the life I needed, please.”
“You left. You got as far away as they dangled the carrot of a better life in front of your face!” I sit quietly on the floorboard of my car, listening to my brother. Part of me is proud that he’s standing up for himself, and the other half is hurting at the hurt in Taylor’s voice. He genuinely seems remorseful about the way he left.
“I asked you to come with me. Lawson and Collins were fine on their own.”
“Maybe they are, but I’m not okay without them.” Leland is pacing on the concrete floor, his large boots echoing with each stomp. Pacing is something he does when he tries to rationalize his thoughts and words. “They have always been my responsibility and they will always be my responsibility. You knew that from the beginning. Don’t you remember? You said you loved that most about me. The whole ‘not leaving my family behind’ then boom! You asked me to leave them behind like a fucking coward.”
“I thought if I was making enough money that we could still take care of them financially,” Taylor defends himself. “I didn’t think that you needed to be here physically. Honestly, I thought with the promotion…”
“God!” Leland exclaims. “What is it with everyone thinking money will solve their problems? You know my dad left for a better job, a better wife, a better family. Better, better, better, better, always something better…” He throws his hands around in the air. “Did you not think of that? Why is the present not good enough?”
“I get it now,” Taylor quickly responds.
“Now?” Leland huffs a sarcastic laugh.
“Yes, now. In San Francisco, I had everything monetary that I could want. But I sat in that lonely home, alone. The laughter we had gone. Here is where I came home to a man who loved me when I had nothing. Stood by me for everything.” He tries pulling Leland toward him. “I thought I could be the one to take care of you because you took care of me. Was it so bad of me to want to be the one to make sure you didn’t have to worry about anything for once? Huh?”
“No,” Leland whispers.
“No?”
“No,” Leland says louder.
“Dinner?” Taylor tries to shoot his shot again. “Please, let me take you out to dinner. One dinner and after, if you still want to shut the door, then I’ll leave it be.”
After a moment of silence, Leland responds. “Fine.”
“Yeah?”
“One dinner and then …”
“Nope, don’t say another word.” Taylor’s voice rings so…hopeful. Excited. “Right at this moment, I am going to have dinner with an amazing man.”
“I have a meeting to go to with the lawyer,” Leland whispers back.
I can hear their feet shuffling around on the concrete floor, small rocks and debris crunching under their feet as Leland ushers them out of the garage. My head falls with the silence of the garage. Various emotions are running through my mind. I am beaming with pride for my brother. He deserves to be happy. So many years spent under the hood of a car to earn a dollar to support me and Lawson.
If Taylor can come back and attempt to swoop Leland up, then I can tell Victor I love him back. Beyond that, I’m not sure, but at least I’m open to see where it goes. Watching them gives me a surge of confidence I need. The door slams shut, knocking me from my thoughts. Once I am sure they are gone, I pop out of the car and clean up.
I can do this.
As I pass Leland’s office on my way out, the door is open, so I quickly sneak inside to look around. Maybe I can help Leland? A drawer that is usually locked isn’t. I grasp the pile of paperwork lying on top and immediately recognize the letterhead. It’s the firm Massey and Victor work at. My eyes read each word, causing my pulse increase.
