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I jerk against him, needing some relief from the burning ache he’s created, and I whimper so loudly into his mouth when I rub right up against his hard cock straining inside his shorts that Shepherd’s hand comes off my cheek to smack loudly against the side of the house right above my head. There’s nothing I can do but cling to him. I’m so dizzy from the feel of his lips and tongue trying to memorize every inch of my mouth that the one leg I’m standing on would give out if he weren’t holding me so tightly against him. Shepherd bends his knees and pushes back up, his hardness rubbing against me until I see stars behind my closed eyes and my leg locks tighter around the back of his thigh.
His kiss is desperate and possessive, telling me with each swipe of his tongue and each gasping breath of mine he swallows into his lungs that I’m his. That I’ve always been his and he meant every word in those messages. And when I feel his powerful body shudder against mine with the force of his own need as I jerk my hips and rub, rub, rub that sweet ache away against him in the same rhythm as his tongue swiping against mine over, and over, and over… I know he has me. Every part of me belongs to Shepherd, and it always has. The small handful of men who came before him were just placeholders until the right one came along. The one whose kisses tell me even better than the words he wrote to me that I’ve always been his.
The sound of someone shouting a few houses away brings me back down to earth, smothering some of my need with a reminder that having my first orgasm with another human being instead of my own hand probably shouldn’t happen out in the open on Shepherd’s front porch, no matter how badly I want it to.
Giving myself a few more seconds to enjoy Shepherd’s dizzying kiss, I finally let go of the firm grip I have on his shirt. With a gentle push of my hands against his chest, I yank my mouth away from his, both of us groaning softly at the loss. His arm is still firmly around me, his other hand is still against the side of the house above my head, and we’re still pressed tightly together from our thighs to our chests as we stand here, lips an inch apart, breathing heavy and staring at each other. Shepherd’s heated gaze as he looks down at me does nothing to cool the fire still raging inside me, and I try to look away, but I can’t. No one’s ever looked at me like this before, like it’s taking everything in him not to rip my clothes off me and fuck me against the side of the house, and it’s addicting. I could stand here all night, drinking in the sight of his flushed skin, the muscle ticking in his jaw covered in a five o’clock shadow of scruff, the feel of his heart racing under my flattened palms, and his eyes darting back and forth between my eyes and my lips.
Nothing can be heard but the sound of the waves crashing against the shore on the other side of Shepherd’s cottage and the rapid beating of my own heart in my ears, neither one of us saying anything. I don’t even know what to say to him right now. Not one thing in my head could accurately convey what he just did to me and how I feel in this moment. How do you tell someone that all these years, you’ve been walking around dead inside, and with one touch of his lips, it shocked you back to life?
I don’t know how. Especially right now with his hardness still pressing into me, and how I can still feel his mouth on mine, and his breath is panting quickly against my lips, and I just want to kiss him again and forget about the rest of the world. So I don’t say anything, because I don’t want to screw it up. I want this moment, this first kiss I’ve been dreaming about since I was a teenager, these couple of minutes in time to remain as perfect as they are in my head right now without me messing it all up by saying something stupid.
Untangling my leg from around his, I duck down and move out from under his arm he’s still holding against the side of the house then quickly make my way over to the porch stairs and down them. My hand comes up as I walk, and my fingertips touch my swollen lips just to reassure myself I didn’t imagine things, now that I’m away from the warm cocoon of his body.
