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“Didn’t I tell you him moving back here would be a good thing? This is such a good thing. Fuck yeah, all the good things!”

Bringing my hand up to my head and closing my eyes, I take a few minutes for the whiplash Tess and Birdie have given me to go away and for them to finally be quiet so I can think. When it’s silent in my kitchen again, I drop my hand and look at them.

“You guys really are a bunch of assholes. After everything Kevin has put me through, do you honestly think I would let someone do that to me again? Please, just trust me first before you make assumptions,” I tell both of their shocked faces, softening my voice as I continue, taking a step closer to them. “I know I’ve let Kevin walk all over me. And I know I’ve let him make me feel like he’s better than me and like I don’t have a voice. And I know you guys have had to sit back and watch that happen all these years, and there was nothing you could do about it, and I can only imagine how hard that was for you. I love you both so much for sticking up for me all the time, but I do have a voice, and I do have a backbone. I just forgot how to use them for a little while. But Shepherd… I don’t know, he brings them out of me. I’m not an idiot. At least, not anymore. I’m not just gonna fall for perfect words sent in messages. Actions speak louder than words, and last night… let’s just say I approve of his actions so far.”

My phone dings with an incoming text in Tess’s hand, and before I can grab it from her, she’s dropping her head to read it.

“Who the hell is Random Guy I Kissed, and why is he sending you a text that just got me pregnant?” Tess screeches. “How many men did you suck face with last night?”

“Give me that,” Birdie orders, smacking my hand away when I try to reach for my phone. “Jesus Christ, I think I just came. Palmer really needs to up his dirty talk. But seriously, who the hell is this random guy you kissed? Shepherd is going to kick his ass!”

My cheeks are already flushed, wondering what Shepherd could have said as Birdie keeps smacking my hands away.

“Will you give me my phone?! That’s Shepherd! It’s just a joke between the two of—Sweet mother of God,” I groan when Birdie finally turns my phone around so I can see the screen.

Random Guy I Kissed: I woke up this morning, and I could still taste you. Christ, your lips are perfect. Everything about you is perfect, but especially the little sounds you make when I’m between your thighs. Can you still feel how hard my cock was for you, baby? 11 hours and 15 minutes until our date.

And just like that, I’m wet while the sun’s up, which I thought was against my religion.

“Oh my God, you have a date with him tonight?” Birdie asks excitedly, bouncing up and down in her seat when I finally manage to snatch my phone out of her hand.

My phone immediately dings with a text as soon as I grab it, making me jump and let out a little squeak when I see it’s another message from Shepherd. It’s like he knows I’m standing here in my kitchen halfway to an orgasm just from a damn text, and he wants to make me even more uncomfortable. Except this is Shepherd we’re talking about, and I should have known better.

Random Guy I Kissed: You’re not the only one who can google phone sex. Boom! Wait… is it too early for phone sex? Is that like, just a nighttime thing? Was that something we were supposed to schedule first? It did feel a little scandalous typing the word “cock” before lunch. I should have done more googling. 11 hours and 14 minutes until our date.

I’m still laughing to myself while Birdie freaks out that I have a date with Shepherd. I don’t even know what made me joke about phone sex with him last night. He just brought something… scandalous out of me, I guess. I’m suddenly a popular person this morning when yet another text chimes from my phone.

“Please be a Shepherd dick pic, please be a Shepherd dick pic,” Tess chants softly with her eyes closed and her hands up in the air with her fingers crossed as I shake my head at her and look down at my phone again.

Sadly, it’s not another vagina-clenching text from Shepherd or one that makes me laugh and puts me at ease. For the first time since Owen was born, I don’t internally scream when I see the name Piece of Shit Dickhole Motherfucker that Tess so kindly changed in my phone six years ago and the first time Kevin asked me if I’d gained weight. Not even a text from Kevin before I’ve been properly caffeinated can worsen my good mood this morning, thinking about my date with Shepherd tonight.

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