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He nodded and caressed her cheek with the back of his hand. "I'd like to believe that. We will see. Some people just can’t motivate themselves to do the things they should. Lucky for you, I love you enough to help you. I also love you enough to try."
“Thank you, Sebastian. I love you, too,” she whispered.
Taylor closed her eyes as he palmed the back of her head and gently massaged her scalp. It wasn’t exactly forgiveness, but it seemed as close as she was going to get right now. Her chest ached. She wanted nothing more than to crawl into the warm reassurance of his arms. Leaning forward, he pressed a light kiss against her brow.
“Go clean yourself up, get dressed, and get dinner started.”
She nodded and blinked against a fresh wave of tears. Shame and confusion still branched through her body and Taylor choked down a whimper, trying to still the trembles in her body as she rose to her feet. Hanging her head, she smoothed the rumpled comforter and grabbed her clothes off the floor. She shivered as she made her way to the bathroom. Sebastian’s weighted stare followed her, assessing her actions every step of the way, and his words chased on her heels.
Chapter 6 ~
The sweet smell of mushrooms and caramelized onions wafted through the house. Setting the steaming skillet aside, Taylor checked on the hamburgers. She bit her lip, praying the simple dinner she’d taken out earlier would be enough to please Sebastian. She couldn’t afford any more screw-ups tonight. A white chocolate and raspberry cheesecake sat cooling in the fridge. At least she had the comfort of knowing dessert was one of his favorites. Her gaze flickered to the living room. He was sitting on the couch with his feet propped up on the coffee table and his laptop open. He’d moved there from his study when she came down, presumably just to keep a better eye on her while he worked. Taylor swallowed, wondering what it was he thought she was going to do—or not do—that he needed to supervise her actions. Part of her kept waiting for him to change his mind, for him to grab the belt and give her the punishment he’d intended. In some ways, knowing she’d hurt him and gotten off scot-free and the constant feeling of waiting for the other shoe to drop was worse than getting the punishment itself.
She frowned and turned her attention back to the kitchen. The tops of the potatoes were starting to crisp the way he liked, and a fragrant burst of cream rolled out of the oven on a billow of steam. Shutting off the heat, she wiped away the smudge her fingers left on the handle and hurried back to the stove to flip the burgers one more time. She jumped, flinching as an unexpected hand settled against her back, stroking where the fiery strips branding her skin should have been.
“Don’t pull away from me,” Sebastian warned quietly. He kissed her neck and rested his chin on her shoulder. His body pressed against hers from behind. “How much longer?”
“Everything’s ready. I’m just getting ready to serve it now.”
“Perfect timing.”
A few minutes later, she’d carried in the food and condiments, lit the candles, and fixed them both a plate. Squirming, she tried to find a comfortable position in her chair. Feeling Sebastian’s stare, she stilled and bit her lip, refusing to meet his eyes. Afraid of what she might see, she watched the candlelight reflect off the glossy cherry table. He set down his fork and leaned closer.
“Is there a problem, Taylor?”
She shook her head. “No.”
He nodded and took a long drink of sweet tea before responding. “You brought this on yourself. Stop squirming and eat.”
“Yes, Sebastian.” She managed to choke down several bites. The silence hanging between them was killing her. Daring a peek in his direction, she decided to take a chance. “How is work going?”
His head snapped up from his plate. Mixed vegetables tumbled off Sebastian’s fork as he stared at her. She held her breath, waiting as his expression shifted from one of utter confusion to surprise. Spearing another forkful, he shrugged.
“Good, I guess. We’re getting close to zeroing in on Laychee’s supplier. That’s all the BATF wants. Once they have that information, we can make our move on him and do as we see fit.”
She frowned. “You have to wait until they have his supplier before you can take him down?”
Sebastian nodded. “That’s the way it works, darling. If other agencies are involved, they get what they want first. We get what’s left over.”
“That must be hard for you sometimes though—the waiting I mean.”
He laughed dryly. “Why? Because I’m so impatient?” He arched a dark golden brow in her direction.
“No. I didn’t mean it like that.”
The left side of his face dimpled with his pensive smile. “It happens more often than I care to admit. Sometimes we have to step aside completely in order to serve the greater good. Yes, it gets frustrating, but security and safety come first. Despite SKALS methods and the end results, our main priority is still to protect this country and its people.” He frowned as he pinned her with an inquisitive stare. “Why do you ask?”
“I was just curious,” she admitted. “I love you, and I want to hear about your day, even if I can’t have all the details.”
He reached over and gave her hand a gentle squeeze. “Don’t worry, baby. We’re going to nail this guy.”
“You’ve had him under surveillance, right? What do you think he’s going to do with all those weapons?” she asked, slipping a small bite of potatoes past her lips.
Sebastian sighed and refocused his attention on his plate. “Even if I knew, I couldn’t tell you, Taylor. Hopefully, nothing.” His lips pursed and whitened for a moment before his gaze swung up to hers. “Dinner is good, sweetheart. Thank you.”
“Way to change the subject,” she teased. Her face lit with hope as Sebastian’s dimples deepened and he offered up a knowing wink.
After dinner, he helped her clear the table, putting the food away while she rinsed things off and loaded the dishwasher. The sun was just starting to set beyond the window bay, flooding the house with a rich colorful glow. Leaning against the island, she took a moment to enjoy the view and marvel at how lucky she was. A few months ago, she’d been struggling to make ends meet. There were nights when cereal or a package of Ramen noodles was all her dinner had consisted of. The only view her rundown apartment had offered was a glimpse of the train tracks and dilapidated urban spread. Though Sebastian would claim his house wasn’t a mansion, it was a virtual palace in her eyes. Everything was gleaming, luxurious, and clean. Even the outside was a decorative sprawl with lush greenery and rocky landscaping with views of the surrounding forest and mountaintops looming in the distance. He gave her so much and asked for so little in return. Her chest twisted with guilt. So little, and even that, she’d managed to screw up.
Hot breath fanned across her nape and she let her heavy lids drift shut as Sebastian pressed behind her. His hand covered her throat, making her heart hammer, but he merely tipped her face up with his fingers and gently coaxed it toward him. His lips brushed hers and he turned her in his arms. When she opened her eyes, she was greeted by the intense green scape of his stare.
“What are you thinking?” he asked.
A sad smile threatened. “How lucky I am to have you. You give me everything. You are everything. You’re my whole world, Sebastian,” she whispered, hanging her head. “I’m so sorry I hurt you and let you down.”
Sebastian stared down at her and stroked her cheek with the pad of his thumb. "If I didn't love you so much you wouldn't have the power to hurt me, Taylor. I'm glad you understand that I only correct you out of love and a desire to better our life together. I forgive you. Just remember what’s important here," he said, his fingers trailing down her back in a gentle reminder of what could have been.
Something in him was changing. She tried not to think about what those changes might mean or at what cost they might come. All that mattered was the here and now. There was no point in clinging to the past, or wallowing in guilt. Instead, she wrapped her arms around him an
d pressed against his chest. Words of gratitude tumbled past her lips. He returned her embrace and held her for a long minute before pulling away and capturing her hands in his.
“You can finish the laundry tomorrow,” he said, drawing her toward the living room. “Come spend time with me.”
Sebastian stared out the window. It was too damn early to be on the job. Darkness still cloaked the warehouse yard and bathed it in deep shadows. Dim yellow streetlights glowed in the distance, illuminating the thick tendrils of pollution rising from the city basin below. The call from Marx had come in just after three, letting him know Laychee and his men were on the move. It figured the cockroaches would scuttle out of hiding when the rest of the world was still fast asleep. That’s what most vermin did. Scrubbing a hand over his face, he sighed. At least he’d turned in at a decent time. After watching a movie and sharing a plate of dessert with Taylor, he’d called it quits and taken her to bed. It had been shortly after eight. Gauging his partner’s bleary expression and the exhaustion still riding his angular features, he decided Josh hadn’t been as fortunate. Nudging him with an elbow, Sebastian pointed to the cup of Pic-N-Run coffee sitting in the holder.
“Better drink up, sunshine.”
“Fuck off, Baas.”
Cocking his head, he forced a terse smile. “Did someone have a rough night?”
Josh snorted and waved him off, slumping against the passenger door of the Benz. “Is this you giving me a taste of my own medicine?”
Sebastian chuckled quietly. “Perhaps. Are we all done with the sharing and exploring each other’s feelings phase of our relationship, now?”
Josh’s face tightened as he forced his gaze out the window. “I think you made it perfectly clear we don’t have any relationship at all, Baas.”
“Jesus. You’re worse than a woman sometimes, you know that?” he snapped. Sighing, he raked a hand through his curls and slumped in his seat. “What I said to you yesterday…I didn’t mean that.”
