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haul. It will always be you and me.”
“Always,” he whispered, pressing his lips against the side of her neck where they lingered against her pulse and burned. Warm dampness fell against her skin and he shuddered above her. “You mean everything to me, baby. Everything. I couldn’t live without you.”
“You don’t have to. Just calm down and hold me. I’m right here, Sebs. I’ll always be right here.”
He mumbled something she couldn’t decipher. Taylor tried to stem the hot scald of tears threatening to flow. She didn’t know what else to say, how to reach him. He was stuck in some brutal nightmare his mind had conjured, and it wouldn’t let him go. She ached to run her fingers through his hair, to cradle the sides of his face, or trace the light golden stubble spanning his jaw, but he held her immobile. His expression remained shielded from her view, but she could feel the full weight of his emotion as it crashed down around her.
“You don’t deserve this,” he whispered. “You deserve so much better. I didn’t mean for any of this to happen. I just wanted somebody to hold. Just once, I wanted somebody to fight for me and love me. You’ve gave me that, but now I want nothing more than to save you from everything about me.”
Dear God. She wanted to die. He’d never opened up to her on this sort of raw, emotional level. She doubted he’d ever let his guard down this much with anyone. He was lost, and his pain was visceral. It cut them both so deep they bled. He slumped against her, the muscles in his body tensing with another drawn out shudder. Pulling her wrists free of his slackening grasp, she wound her arms around him and smoothed her hands up and down the taut planes of his back.
“You don’t have to save me, Sebastian. I’m exactly where I want to be.”
His laughter was dry and hoarse. “After all of the times I’ve let you down? Come on. I held a gun to your head, Taylor. I hate myself for doing that every single day and, no matter how much I want to, I can never take that back. You could have been killed tonight. I’m a mere breath away from helping Marx unleash the worst kind of death and destruction our country has ever seen. Can you honestly look me in the eye and say you want to be with someone like me—that our relationship isn’t just a necessity? That you aren’t just too scared to leave?”
“Stop it.”
She wanted to keep the anger and force out of her voice. She wanted to more than anything, but she couldn’t. Sebastian’s head snapped up and his striking sage eyes blazed as they drilled into her. They narrowed when she lifted her chin.
“What?” His voice was low now, his tone menacing.
“You heard me. Just stop it, Sebastian,” she repeated just as forcefully. Her heart sped up when the muscles in his cheek twitched. It was a dangerous tell of his anger, but she held her ground. “You don’t like it when I question your love, so stop doubting mine. I’m here. I’m wearing your ring and I’m carrying our baby. I will let you guide our life and our relationship all you want, but you have no right to tell me how I feel. You don’t get to decide that. I do. It’s my choice, and I decided a long time ago that I love you. Do you hear me, Sebastian? I fucking love you and all you’re doing right now is hurting me.”
His eyebrow shot up at her language. Or maybe it was her tone. It was probably both, but she didn’t care. He said he’d wanted someone to fight for him. Well, here she was, geared up and ready for war if that’s what he needed. He could get mad. He could brand her ass until she couldn’t sit and her voice was so hoarse that she couldn’t scream. She would risk the full-blown wrath of Marx and SKALS. The world itself could fall to ruin and everything they had could turn to ashes, but as long as there was a single breath left inside him, she was not going to give up on this man. She was never going to give up.
Sebastian’s cheeks hollowed. Eyes still narrowed, his jaw tensed as he squinted down at her. His lips flattened and, still holding her stare, he nodded.
“I appreciate what you said, but don’t ever speak to me in that tone or use that language toward me again. Is that understood?”
Without warning, he wedged the hard ridge of his thigh between hers, forcing them apart. Her eyes darted to his, silently pleading with him to stay grounded and not to lash out.
“I’m so very glad to hear you say those things, Taylor, because I could never let you leave,” he whispered against her neck. “You are a part of me now and I would never let you take my child away. I love you more than life, but you seem to have forgotten where we stand.”
She shivered as his hand moved off her wrist to close around her breast. The fingers sinking into the tender mound were hard and demanding. They squeezed, plucked, and kneaded without mercy. There was a hunger, a savagery to his touch she had not felt in a long time. It was dizzying, frightening. More than anything, she wished she could truly decipher where they stood.
“Seb, I…”
Pressing a forefinger to her mouth, he silenced her. “No more talking. I’ve said all I am going to about the matter. I don’t want words, Taylor. I want you to prove the things you claim. Is that clear?”
Her pulse became a violent crescendo that roared through her veins like a surging ocean tide. “Yes, Sebastian.”
She felt, rather than saw, the terse smile he offered in response.
“Good girl,” he whispered. His fingers trailed over the bared curve of her hip as he inched down her body. The warm, woodsy smell of his skin washed over her but brought little comfort given the ferocity in his gaze.
“Open your legs,” he ordered, his voice bordering on a growl. “Wider.”
Impatience marked his touch as he wrenched her thighs open. Taylor shivered despite the heat running rampant inside her. Meeting her eyes for the briefest of seconds, Sebastian gripped her legs. His mouth sealed hard against her sex. The demanding sweep of his tongue made her bow off the mattress. Growling against her, his hold tightened, trapping her in place. He plunged his tongue deep and, keeping her anchored, he speared into her aching body with a vengeance. There was nothing gentle about it. It was a full on assault. Fast, furious, and almost animalistic in its frenzy. He was a man on a mission, hell-bent on making her come as hard and as fast as possible.
Releasing the plush comforter, she sank her hands into his hair. An ominous rumble vibrated against her as she tugged at his thick curls in a fit of desperation, egging him on. Opening her wider Sebastian swirled the velvety spear probing her body, the glide of his taste buds a hundred tiny nubs stroking across her. Taylor cried out. The pleasurable hum coursing through her grew to a forceful throb. She bucked against him, too winded to scream as release crashed through her.
Sebastian moaned, his body tensing. She twisted, struggling to break free, but he held tight, the slow swirl and licking strokes of his tongue forcing her to ride out wave after wave until he’d milked her completely and she had nothing left to give.
Inching his way back up her body, he took his time running his hands over her skin and plying it with scorching kisses. There was an undeniable reverence and ownership in his touch, leaving her no doubt she was both worshiped and claimed by this man. She whimpered as he captured a dusky nipple between his teeth and tugged. Something unnamable lingered in his pale green eyes as they locked with hers. Danger and determination rolled off him, rippling along her fevered skin as he sucked and nipped at the stiffened peak until she was certain she was going to go mad.
“Sebastian…please…”
Drawing her nipple deeper into the hot recesses of his mouth, he sucked with zeal, his long fingers dipping between her legs to keep her thighs parted. Arching into his hand, her breath left her in a ragged groan as he teased the length of her slit. He teased her outer lips and circled the outline of her clit before resting his fingers against her. The pressure without friction was maddening. Taylor moaned beneath her breath and waited, praying he would move. Unable to bear the torment, her hips betrayed her, humping against him on their own accord.
A stinging slap to the outside of her thigh brought her out of her frenzied quest
with a yelp. A quiet rumble of amusement rolled through Sebastian as he leaned back and yanked her down toward his hips.
“That’s part of your problem, darling. You’re always so eager for the rewards, but you give little thought to the repercussions in life.”
Gripping the thick length of his cock, he rubbed the heavy tip against her, coating him in her juices. His gaze remained rooted on hers as he traced a slow path up and down her slit. He was killing her and he knew it. It took every ounce of self-restraint she had not to impale herself on that glorious shaft and fuck herself into oblivion. Fisting the blankets, she let her head fall back with a miserable groan. He was so cruel. So deliciously cruel.
A low rumble welled in Sebastian’s throat as he leaned over her, pressing her deeper into the mattress. His eyes locked with hers, his stare almost hypnotic, as he pushed his way inside. Filling her to the brink, he ground deep. Sebastian drove into her time and again, rocking her body with the hard, steady thrusts she had come to know and crave. The clash of their mouths grew fevered and violent as they searched for a way to hold on to themselves and each other. Her nails raked his back, her heels digging into the tight muscles of his ass. The rhythmic slap of skin echoed around them, mingling with the low growls of pleasure vibrating against her ear.
He made it so easy to let herself go and forget. Forget the rules, forget the danger and the risks, forget the rest of the world even existed. Alone, they were adrift, but together there was a stillness and a sense of peace. Their love was a twisted refuge. It was the shore where they rested, the only place where they could find comfort and belonging.
Sebastian’s arms wound around her shoulders, driving her down into his thrusts and assuring her body had little give. Sweat beaded along his brow and a heavy flush settled across his cheeks, accenting the determination on his face. Bowing his head, he kissed the shell of her ear.
