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"Aye, I did love him," Kate said unhappily. "More fool I."
"Oh, Kate, do not say that," Annabel said sadly, patting her hand. They sat on the bed in the room she'd first taken her to, a tray of food between them that neither of them had touched yet.
"But I am a fool," Kate cried unhappily. "He was not at all the man I thought he was." She almost moaned the words.
"What happened?" Annabel asked, releasing her hand to pick up her cider and take a sip.
"It was all grand at first," Kate said sadly. "The excitement, the adventure . . . and the bedding too."
Annabel choked on the cider and quickly set the goblet back on the tray as she began to cough.
"Are you all right?" Kate asked, thumping her back.
"I--yes, of course," she gasped, waving away her thumping.
"I am sorry. Should I not have mentioned the bedding?" Kate asked uncertainly. "I thought as you are married I could talk about it to you. But I suppose being raised in the convent, you may be a little more reticent."
"Nay, 'tis fine," Annabel assured her, and then prompted, "So, 'twas all wonderful at first."
"Aye." Kate slumped where she sat. "That first day and night were magical, but things started to go bad the next day. Grant woke up surly and short-tempered. He was hungry, and we had nothing to eat and then it started to rain." She closed her eyes, her expression unhappy at the memory. "We rode all day in a downpour, both of us on my mare." She grimaced and told her, "I wanted to take one of father's horses too when we left, but Grant refused. He said they could hunt us down and kill him for stealing it. But at least with an extra horse we could have sold it for food or something."
Annabel murmured soothingly, unsure what else to do. She thought Grant had been right in refusing to take something that wasn't his.
"Anyway, we found shelter in an old abandoned hut." Kate continued, her mouth tightened. "It was full of spiders and rats, but at least it was out of the rain. We cuddled together to get warm and made love again and it was even better than the first time. But once it was done he rolled away and went to sleep and I was so cold and hungry . . ." She paused on a little sob, and wiped away a tear with her hand. "The next morning Grant was even more surly. He said I was a mess and should clean myself up in the river. But I was not going to bathe out of doors!" she cried, tears forgotten in favor of indignation. "Why, I could have caught my death. Besides, I had bathed just three weeks before we left Waverly."
"Ah," Annabel murmured. She wasn't surprised at these words. While she had got used to bathing in the stream three or more times a week thanks to working in the stables, most of the women at the abbey had bathed much less frequently. However, Grant had worked in the stables and she suspected he'd bathed more often because of it as well.
"And then he started in on my hair being a mess and could I not do something with it?" She snorted. "How, I ask you? I had a brush, but no maid to wield it."
"Hmmm," Annabel murmured, biting her lip. There had been no maid for her at the abbey, she had always managed brushing her own hair.
"And then he caught some fish in the river and brought them back, expecting me to cook them," she said with open horror. "I said, do I look like a servant to you?" Her eyes flashed with remembered fury and then pain flashed across her face and she added, "And he said, nay, I did not look like much of anything at the moment, except perhaps a whore who had fallen on bad fortune. And certainly, that was about all I was good for."
"Oh dear," Annabel breathed.
"How could he say that to me?" Kate cried miserably. "I thought that he loved me. We were supposed to run away and live happily ever after, and . . . and . . ." Covering her face, she burst into loud noisy sobs again.
"Oh dear. All right, 'twill be all right," Annabel said, hugging her and rubbing her back soothingly.
"How can it be all right?" Kate cried miserably, pulling back. "He brought me up here and dumped me at your gate like waste. He said I was ugly and as useless as a stone and he knew not what he had ever seen in me." Wiping her face, she snapped. "Me. Can you imagine? I am not ugly. I am the beautiful sister. You were always the fat, ugly one. And I am not useless. I was born to rule, not grovel in the dirt like a peasant."
"Ah," Annabel murmured, finding it hard to think of anything sympathetic to say at that point. She did not think Kate had meant to hurt her with her comments. She was simply stating fact when she said Annabel was the fat, ugly sister. All one had to do was look at how her gown hung on Kate to see that, but Annabel was hurt anyway.
Sadly, she also had a bit more sympathy for Grant. What had Kate expected? That her life would somehow miraculously continue unchanged? That Grant would provide her with fine clothes, a maid and a castle to live in from thin air? He was not even a stable master, but the son of a stable master, who had no doubt helped muck out the stalls. She doubted he had one coin to spend on her sister.
"Everything will work out," Annabel said finally, getting off the bed and bending to collect the tray. Straightening, she added, "I think you should rest for now. Things will look brighter when you wake up."
"I do not see how, but I am tired," Kate said on a sigh and stretched out on the bed. "Will you come back and talk to me later? I have so much to tell you. It has been a long time since we have seen each other."
"Aye." Annabel smiled, but more in relief that she wasn't protesting her leaving than anything else. She felt even more relief once she was actually out of the room with the door closed behind her, which made her feel guilty as sin. Her sister had been through a lot. All her hopes and dreams had just collapsed around her. It was uncharitable of her to resent that Kate wanted only to talk about herself and cared not what had gone on in Annabel's life during this "long time" since they'd seen each other.
Releasing a little sigh, Annabel walked up the hall and carried the tray of meat pies and beverages into the master bedchamber. Seonag glanced up at her entrance and set down the sewing she was working on.
"How is yer sister?"
"Tired and disappointed in how things have turned out," Annabel said quietly as she set the tray on the bedside table and turned to peer at Ross. "No change?"
"Not yet," Seonag answered. "But I'm sure he'll be right as rain in no time."
"Aye," Annabel muttered, beginning to fear that may not be true. "Thank you for sitting with him, Seonag, but I shall take over now. 'Tis almost the sup," she added. "You should go below and join the table."
The maid hesitated, but then said, "Only if ye promise to lie down and sleep fer a bit." When Annabel opened her mouth to refuse, Seonag added, "Ye've slept no more than minutes this last night and day since he was injured. Ye'll do the laird no good do ye make yerself sick. He would no' want that."
Annabel let her breath out and slumped in defeat. The truth was, she was exhausted, and sleep sounded a heavenly idea. Raising her shoulders again, she said, "Very well, but only for a couple of hours. I would appreciate it if you would wake me up after that. I promised Kate I would go speak to her later."
Seonag nodded and stood. "Sleep well. Ye need it. Ye do no' want Ross wakin' up to find ye looking so haggard."
Annabel's eyes widened with alarm at those words as she watched the woman leave the room. No, she certainly did not want to look haggard when Ross woke up. It would just make Kate look even better, which she certainly didn't need. She was already insecure about how he would react when he saw what he had missed out on, and worried that he might set her aside to claim her sister.
She probably wouldn't fret so much about that had her mother not moaned on about how disappointing she was in the area of attractiveness, and how Kate had looked so much prettier in the gown, and how she was sure "the Scot" would refuse the contract the moment he saw her. Truly, after hours of that, Annabel had been amazed when he had been so kind and agreed to marry her. But then he had never seen Kate. He probably thought them similar in looks.
