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“She didn’t say.”
“Aw, that’s so sad.”
“Well it’s convenient for me because I’m going to tell Randy that Velma told me about her, and that I don’t want to compete with a ghost, so I have to break up with him.”
“You’ve stooped low before but now you’ve reached a whole other level,” Saundra replied. “How could you use something like that against him? He’s probably still healing.”
“Well then I’m not causing him any pain. If he’s still going through the motions about some other chick, he’ll quickly forget about me.”
“That sucks, Asha, and I think you’re way out of hand this time,” Saundra said with obvious distaste.
“Why are you getting all bent out of shape? You usually hate the guys I date.”
“I dislike their arrogance but I don’t think Randy deserves what you’re going to do to him. He’s different.”
“Whose side are you on, anyway?” I asked, getting defensive.
“The victim’s, of course,” Saundra said snottily.
“I’ll talk to you later,” I said, slamming the phone down.
I should have known better than to tell Saundra my plan. She’s always trying to give me some fucking moral lesson every time I do something that she doesn’t agree with. Her job is to be my sister, not a therapist nor a counselor; if I need either, I have the goddamn yellow pages. Regardless of her opinion, the shit is going down tonight. By this time next week, Randy Thompson should be just another face in my photo album.
I enjoyed my last date with Randy. We went to my favorite Japanese restaurant and after that, we ate chocolate fondue at a French café around the corner. It was truly a fun and delicious evening. Too bad it would end on a sour note. We took a cab to my house but stopped at the liquor store first for some gin. Randy was already a little buzzed from drinking all that sake at the Japanese restaurant, but I needed him drunker so the news wouldn’t hurt so much.
Two hours and four drinks later, I knew it was time. I had to stop now and tell him before he passed out or was too incoherent to understand me. Miles Davis filled the candlelit room with his soothing rhythm and I sat down next to Randy on the couch as he smiled at me and tapped his glass to the beat.
“Randy, I have something serious to discuss with you,” I said, turning my body completely in his direction.
Usually those words would send alarm signals to someone but the gin made him completely oblivious.
“What’s up, baby doll?” he asked, taking another gulp.
“Yesterday Velma told me about your fiancée Tracy, and . . . and I feel like I’ve sort of taken her place or I’m competing with a ghost,” I said, fidgeting with my hands.
His face had an eerie shadow over it at the mention of her name and he stared ahead as if I wasn’t there.
“I don’t know how to tell you this but I . . . I can’t be with you anymore.” When I said it, his glass hit the floor sending its remains flying everywhere.
“Asha, please don’t do this to me. I love you. I can’t believe you would feel as though I’m trying to make you someone else. Velma had no right telling you my business,” he said, grabbing for my hand. I jerked away and got up to get the broom.
“I loved Tracy with all my heart and I’m not going to lie to you about that, but I found you and you haven’t replaced Tracy. You gave me another chance to love,” he said, his voice trembling.
I felt that my lie was failing and that a bit of the truth needed to be added in. God, I’m glad I didn’t have too much to drink because I probably would’ve taken it all back.
“Randy, that’s not my only problem. You’re getting way too serious. I never indicated at any time that I even wanted to be loved. All I wanted was to have a good time and have some company. Please understand that I’m not ready for all this.”
“Asha, I’m sorry for any stress I’ve put you through but when I fell for you, I fell so hard. We can take it slow from now on but I’m begging you not to just write me off,” he said with tears streaming down his face.
“I can’t, Randy. I think it’s best
if we move on,” I said, sweeping up the glass.
“I can’t believe you’re doing this to us. I thought . . . I mean, I tried to do everything in my power to make you happy,” he said, holding his head in his hands.
“Please, Randy, I don’t want you to beat yourself up over this. You’re a wonderful man and I’m sure there’s someone out there who’s ready for a commitment.”
“Is there someone else?” he asked with his eyes squinted in pain.
