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“Well,” he says. “There are a couple of things that we can do.” He pulls me up so that I’m sitting higher on my knees and I’m nestled between his legs. “If you want, all this can end. We can go our separate ways, and we’ll think of this as a great memory for the both of us. I don’t really want that.”
“Neither do I.”
He gives me a relieved smile. “Good. Another option is that we can continue on as we are now. Or, you can go home, and we’ll work out how this relationship will work living apart. And if those options don’t work, we’ll figure something else out.”
That’s a lot of options, and I don’t know what would be best. How could I go back to living by myself and also do this? It doesn’t seem possible.
Matthew clears his throat, “I know that whatever we choose, it’s a big step. But I have some things to say, and they might affect your decision.”
“I don’t even have a decision yet.”
He smiles. “I know, but I’m going to say this anyway.” He takes my hands and weaves our fingers together. “When I saw you at Lily and Mark’s wedding, I thought that you were beautiful, and I knew that you were submissive.”
“You still never told me how.”
“It was the way you looked at the kinky couples,” he says, pressing a kiss to the back of my knuckles. “Even though you seemed nervous, you didn’t look afraid, and there was longing there. You wanted it, even if you couldn’t say it.”
I glare at him. “Damn Doms.”
“Did you just swear at me?”
“No, Sir.”
He chuckles. “Anyway. I liked you, and I had fun with you in those fifteen minutes, an even though you wanted nothing to do with me, I thought that if I could get you to admit what you really wanted I could send you on your way, and you’d be a little happier.
“But then you came here, and you were more than I ever expected. You responded so beautifully even when you were fighting me, and I found that dominating you was the most fun that I’d had in a long time, and I didn’t want you to go. And after this month, I still don’t want you to go.”
My heart skips a beat, and I feel myself go still.
Matthew pulls out a silver necklace. It’s delicate and feminine and it pools in his palm like liquid. “I know that I’ve told you a lot that you’re mine, and it was a part of the play. But I really do want you to be mine. My submissive.” He stops, and I see emotion spring onto his face. “I love you, Emma. I’m so in love with you, and if I had a choice, I’d never want you to leave. And this,” he says, holding out the necklace, “is a collar that would say that.”
Matthew told me about collars. About how serious couples in the lifestyle adopt them as a sign of commitment. They’re not offered lightly, and in some circumstances are just like an engagement ring. We talked about what it would mean for him, and even though it’s not marriage, it’s close. A step on the way to getting married. So him offering this to me isn’t a small thing.
My mind snaps back to his words and I feel my jaw drop. “You love me?”
“Yes,” he says. “I love you, Emma. More than I could say.”
Joy sweeps through me, and I feel the answering words about to burst from me. “I love you too!” I jump up, and slide into his lap, kissing him. “I love you.”
His arms come around me hard, and he returns the kiss, taking control of it, and I let him. I want to drown in him and never ever leave. Matthew pulls away long enough to look at me. “Will you stay with me?”
“Yes,” I say, pulling myself closer. “I want to stay with you.” And as I say it, I feel that same joy, like every piece of my life just clicked into place. I always want to feel this way. Always.
Matthew sets me down on the ground so I’m kneeling again, now facing away from him. “May I put this on?”
“Yes, Master.” I use the title to tell him that I know what this means. That it’s serious. And I get tiny goosebumps down my spine while he fastens the clasp.
“Now you really are mine,” he says in my ear, voice rough in my ear.
“I know,” I say.
“And now that you’re not leaving,” he says, “we have all the time in the world.”
I lean back against his legs. “What did you have in mind, Sir?”
“Stay here.” Matthew stands and goes to one of the large storage closets and pulls out a whole length of blue rope. “Stand.”
