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“All good.”

This is one of those moments I swear I’ll remember in my next life.

An evergreen blazer pecks at my stomach, and I’m lucky they’re still young because their beaks grow sharp enough to pierce through trees as adults.

“I can sometimes sense what a phoenix is feeling,” I say.

“Yeah?”

“The first time it happened was when I was close to Gravesend’s egg. Her song was this beautiful chaos that told me how lethal she would be.” There’s a part of me that doesn’t want to talk about these powers that I shouldn’t have so Wyatt won’t see me as a specter. But this is why I’m here. I’ve got to share these insights so we can stop this. “Then I felt her warning me of danger after she hatched. That’s when she was stolen from me and . . .”

Wyatt sits beside me. “It’s odd that Luna wanted a century phoenix. If killed, wouldn’t she want to be reborn sooner than one hundred years?”

“I was told by . . .” I remember the conversation with Ness in the supplies closet where he laid out everything for me. The sun swallower cuddles up against my chest and maybe she can feel my emotions too. “I was told by an insider that Luna has been very calculating. Maybe the regenerative essence of the golden-strand hydra has some effect on the century phoenix’s rebirthing?”

“I’m sure many alchemists who had hoped to accomplish a similar elixir of their own would’ve overlooked century phoenixes since resurrection may ultimately feel like death if they return a lifetime later to find their loved ones gone and the world changed. She’s certainly a genius if this is the case. Evil genius, but a genius nonetheless.”

If only we had someone as brilliant on our side to solve this power-binding potion.

“You recall nothing from Bautista’s or Keon’s lives,” Wyatt states.

“Nope. Luna believes she fractured my ability to remember past lives when she stabbed Bautista with an infinity-ender blade. I’m only alive because she didn’t deliver an instantly fatal blow during that lifetime.”

“But then that would mean that Bautista knew he was Keon. Perhaps there’s a chance we mend that ability for you or even . . .” There’s so much life in Wyatt’s eyes as his thoughts have carried him away, like he’s flying away on Nox to his next destination. “What if . . . But no . . . except not impossible all things considered . . . work our way back and then . . .” Wyatt stops talking to himself as he stands. “Emil, take care of these little nuggets. I have matters to discuss with Tala.” He has one foot out of the door when he stops. “It’s clear I mean nuggets as the little precious babies of gold they are and not to be eaten, yes? Wonderful, wonderful.”

Wyatt leaves, this time for good.

The sun swallower and evergreen blazers continue crawling all over me, and even though I’m not fully convinced I deserve it, I take Wyatt’s words to heart that I’m not the same as the killers I’m trying to stop. Playing with the phoenixes is a small joy I give myself, and I’m going to keep my eyes open for more.

Thirty-One

Paper Bird

MARIBELLE

This may be a paradise for some, but watching Tala scrub Roxana’s belly with a sponge makes me miss a city of people trying to kill me.

“So Wyatt seems to have gotten on your nerves,” I say.

“He’s very irritating.”

“You two seem like tolerant exes.”

“We’ve never dated because I’m not his reflection.” Tala throws the sponge back into a bucket and sits next to me on the bench. “Also because I’m a lesbian. Wyatt is an exceptional Halo Knight who will do great things, I’ve thought this since meeting him two years ago. But sometimes it’s hard being around him. It’s as if . . . it’s as if he’s walking sunshine in a colorless world. I know that death is part of the cycle, but my loss is still fresh and I can’t imagine a future where I’m giving out fun Sanctuary tours or flirting with someone upon meeting them.”

I r

elate to so much of what she’s saying. I’m further along on this journey of grieving parents, but I still have great distances to travel too.

“Atlas is the reason I wasn’t angry all the time.”

“No one would’ve described me as quick to anger before my parents died.”

“It’s like you’ve lost yourself.”

“All the good parts of my soul,” Tala says as she pulls out a piece of paper from her pocket and begins folding. “In some ways, the old Tala has burned out and I’m still getting used to the new Tala who has been reborn in her place.” She focuses on what appears to be origami. I can make out the wings right before she presents it. “Paper bird.”

“Is origami your thing?”

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