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The nurse came in then to check her vitals. “Any sensation yet?”
Liv looked at Ben, then at the nurse. “My legs.”
The nurse’s eyes opened wide, and she pulled the sheet back. She started tapping different areas. “Can you feel this? What about this?” Liv kept nodding. She felt it all.
“Oh Liv, this is wonderful! Let me call the doctor. I’ll be right back.”
Ben watched the scene play out in front of him. He didn’t know what it meant, but he started to put it together. He didn’t speak. He stood and stared at her.
She looked uncomfortable, yet elated.
The nurse came back. “I paged him and he’s on his way. Oh, honey, I am so happy for you. This soon after the surgery.” She turned to Ben. “It’s wonderful news, isn’t it?”
Ben nodded his head.
The nurse continued to check Liv’s extremities, making notes.
“It’s been a long, hard road for our girl here, but what a miracle. Liv, by tomorrow, you may be walking. Short distances and with a walker, but walking.”
The doctor came in before the nurse finished. He appeared as excited by Liv’s ability to move her legs as the nurse had been.
“We’ll take it slow. Don’t get any ideas about getting up for a drink of water in the middle of the night. Tomorrow morning we’ll see if we can get you on your feet. Do not, I repeat, do not try to do it tonight.”
The doctor turned to Ben. “No one more stubborn than our girl here. Don’t let her try to get out of bed.”
Liv smiled, but hadn’t said anything since the nurse asked her if she had any sensation. Not a single word.
The doctor leaned down and kissed the top of Liv’s head, then stood back. “I’ve become fond of many of my patients through the years, Olivia, but I can tell you, few have come to mean as much to me as you do. If there was anyone I would’ve wished this for, it’s you.”
The doctor said goodnight and left, and the nurse said she’d be back in a while to check on her again, but to ring if she needed anything. She asked Liv if she wanted something to eat, but she only shook her head.
“What will you do?” Liv asked Ben once they left.
“Tell the truth.”
“Well,” she said, as if she expected him to leave.
“Scoot over,” he said, kicking off his shoes. He laid down next to her, and put his arm around her waist. “You have a lot to tell me. Start at the beginning. Tell me about the accident.”
“Ben, we can’t do this.”
“We can, and we’re gonna. You kept me away for weeks. I’m not going anywhere tonight.” He saw Liv was struggling to keep her eyes open. “We can talk tomorrow. Sleep. I’ll still be here when you wake up.”
Liv’s eyes closed, and within seconds, her breathing evened out.
There was a war of emotions taking place in Ben’s head. Anger, hurt, confusion, and love waged a battle in his heart.
Why had Liv done this? None of it made sense to him. Why would she let him go on believing she was in a coma? If it was because she thought he’d leave the tour, she would’ve been partially right. He would’ve come to see her. But knowing she was awake would’ve fueled his desire to make music. He would’ve rejoiced.
It was clear that up until tonight, Liv hadn’t had feeling in her legs. Which meant she was paralyzed, and she tried to protect him from it. It was like a bad remake of a movie that had been done ten times too many.
Ben wondered if he’d ever get through to her. She mattered. Not what she did or achieved. Just her. She was enough.
That was the point, though, wasn’t it? He’d never get through to her. In the last year, he’d begged her to let him be a part of her life, but she held him at arm’s length.
Was it that simple? Liv meant more to him than he did to her. Even ten minutes ago she said it again. “Ben, we can’t do this.”
He wanted to touch her for just a little while longer. Maybe his arms would memorize how it felt to have her wrapped in them. His chest would remember how it felt to have her head resting softly on it. Maybe his heart would remember how to rejoice in the fact that she walked this earth, rather than mourn that he couldn’t watch her as she did.
