Page 12 of Needing Her


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“However—” Drawing my attention once again, I whirled around on my stool to watch Sam clean the bar expertly with innocence tainting his expression. He had a new nose piercing since the last time I had been here; he might’ve had it before, but I didn’t pay enough attention to him. “I do know that Hailey goes to The Speakeasy every Monday with her sisters. She’s been doing it for years. If you hurry, you might catch her… just don’t tell her I told you.”

“I owe you one, man.” Hopping off the stool, I pulled my cell phone out of my jeans pocket to unlock it with skilled ease. “Thanks.”

“Thank me in Benjamins if you want to just call it even. I don’t get paid enough to set you up with the hottest chick ever and not get anything out of it.”

“Yeah—I got it.” Answering absently, I wandered towards the exit with a glare trained on my back, and I searched the restaurant in question before even making it into the alleyway. Sam’s words kept replaying to beat against my forehead, and my breath shallowed out as I hopped into my rental car’s driver’s seat.

“—just stopped coming…”

“Fuck.” Gripping the wheel tightly once the engine had roared to life, I peeled out the back of the alley and onto a deserted side street. My phone chimed and talked with a robotic feminine voice, but I could barely pay attention even as it told me where to go.

The memories that bombarded me were more intense than usual, and I sucked in a hard breath through flared nostrils only to get slammed with the same scent of the car Hailey had driven.

I hadn’t been with another woman since her; not because I didn’t find them attractive, but because I felt guilty. I felt like I was betraying Hailey even though I still couldn’t make sense of those three days ten months ago. I had never cheated on a woman I was in a relationship with, but I couldn’t help but imagine that that was what it felt like.

‘Turn left in 200 feet, and your destination will be on the right.’ The voice that echoed from my phone’s speaker sent a sizzling tension through my muscles and just under my skin. Clenching and releasing my jaw, I forced myself not to step too hard-on the gas or the brakes as I took a sharp left. This place wasn’t too far—or maybe I just wasn’t paying attention to distance.

Either way, my fingers tingled as they tapped on the wheel, and prickles shot down my spine. My eyes narrowed, scanning the sidewalks filled with people on their lunch breaks. High-rises and business buildings rose up tall on either side of the street, and I rolled to a strained stop at a crosswalk. Pulling up onto the curb a few dozen feet away from the Speakeasy, I turned the car off and shored up every ounce of hope I could muster that Hailey would at least listen to what I had to say.

After all, the person she met, and the man I was now, were very different.

Climbing out of the car, I shut the door and shoved the keys into my pocket on my way onto the sidewalk. Only briefly did my gaze flicker to the patio that jutted from the building set far back, but it was far too hot out for anyone to be comfortable there. Striding to the front door on stiff legs, I reached to rake my hand through my hair as my heart thundered loudly in my ears.

I hadn’t been so nervous to see a girl since my 8th grade formal, and I inhaled a deep, steadying breath as I grabbed the shiny, brass door handle. The Speakeasy was draped in a light atmosphere, and the unmistakable smell of freshly baked bread wafted into my nostrils at the slightest crack in the door. My abdomen tightened, and I held my breath as I stepped through the threshold to scan the rows upon rows of booths and tables.

Hailey’s familiar, bright hair reflected the sunlight streaming through huge picture windows, and I made a beeline for her without thought. Her sisters sat around her, with a child that couldn’t be older than 4, a 2-year-old, and four car seats that took up two tables pushed up against their booth.

My heart slammed against its cage erratically, only worsening the closer I came, and a cold sw

eat slicked my palms as Hailey reached into a seat. Her expression softened, light, sky blue eyes shimmering as her lips stretched in a smile, and she carefully hoisted a tiny baby out of the seat.

Blood pounded in my ears, drowning out the droning of quiet conversation as my narrowed eyes locked on a head of fine, jet black hairs no longer than my pinky finger. Pausing mid-step, I sucked in a sharp breath that whistled through the air, and Hailey’s familiar gaze zeroed in on my face.

But I couldn’t take my eyes off the infant as she squawked loudly, nuzzling her mother’s breast hungrily.

“A- Anthony…?” Hailey’s horrified, shocked whisper drew my gaze, and suddenly all three of her sisters were staring at me.

“Anthony?” The collectively surprised chorus that sputtered out my name sent goosebumps washing my arms, and I clenched my hands into tight fists. My thoughts swirled in an uncontrollable maelstrom while my heart beat so hard it threatened to crack a rib. Taking a mindless step forward, I opened my mouth before my eyes drifted back to the infant, but nothing came out.

Blinking hard, I snapped my jaw shut to grind my teeth harshly, and I inhaled sharply through flared nostrils before walking the few feet to Hailey’s table. My mind scrambled to find something to say—anything—even though I couldn’t make a coherent thought, and my gaze flickered to Hailey’s face to find her pale and gaunt.

“Why?” The question squeezed past the lump in my throat, and the bubble surrounding us was popped by it to create shockwaves that rattled my bones. Hailey’s eyes widened to the point that I could barely see her pretty irises, and her mouth dropped open only to exhale soundless air. “Why didn’t you tell me…?”

“I… I… wait, Anth—” Leaning down, I braced one hand on the back of the booth as Hailey cut herself off to gasp, and I could smell whatever soup she’d been eating without even breathing. She didn’t tense, though, and a hard drum beat sounded against my skull before I tore my eyes off her to look down.

Milky, grey-blue eyes stared up at me in wonder, and my heart squeezed painfully in its cage. Upside down to her, the infant blinked blearily, but she was quiet even as her tiny fingers clenched and released against Hailey’s shirt. I had been around my fair share of babies, but this one was the most angelic, beautiful—God, there weren’t enough words to describe her.

And she was mine.

That thought shattered my mind into billions of tiny pieces, and I carefully reached with my free hand to stroke her cheek. Her head turned automatically, mouth open, and a wide smile curved my lips at her squeak when nothing grazed her tongue.

“Anthony, please…” Hailey’s soft murmur only pulled a grunt from me, and I slipped my finger into the baby’s palm. She’s got a strong grip. “I can’t do this right now—I need to go back to work.”

“I’ll take her.” Speaking up firmly, I tore my eyes off the baby to watch surprise flicker through Hailey’s. Panic struck my chest and pounded against my skull, and I opened my mouth only to blurt out the exact opposite of what I wanted to say. “I’ll watch her until you get off.”

“Uh… uh… I…” Clenching my jaw tightly as Hailey stammered in uncertainty, I found myself desperately hoping she said ‘no’; I had no fucking idea how to take care of an infant. My only experience was holding Stu’s baby grand-niece a few times, but that was nearly 4 years ago.

Shit, shit, shit…

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