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“I mean, I don’t begrudge you or anything, Anthony. H was very adamant about not telling you. It’s not your fault… I just never expected you to step up without any questions at all. It says a lot about you, you know? That even though you and H don’t know each other, you’re making an effort for the baby. I don’t think I believed her about you.”
My question must’ve been written on my face, and Kelly smiled sheepishly as she carefully folded a men’s button down against her chest. “That you’re overwhelmingly intense. Even last night—I felt it all the way upstairs. Everyone noticed at the Speakeasy. I don’t think I’ve ever seen H back down like that with anyone… even our dad, she never just let him in her space like that.”
“She told me about him.” My simple declaration earned me a wide-eyed, incredulous stare from a jaw-drop-shock expression, and Kelly nearly dropped the shirt as I frowned. “What?”
“N- nothing—” Stuttering slightly, she shook her head even as she continued her explanation. “It’s just that H never tells anyone that kind of stuff. She doesn’t want them to pity her and do stuff for her they wouldn’t normally do. I’m surprised she told you. Our parents are a very sore subject for her. Mom doesn’t even know she was pregnant.”
“… Hailey said you had a copy of her labor, can I watch it?” Changing the subject before I entered territory I couldn’t escape, I held my breath until Kelly nodded firmly. The atmosphere lightened considerably, and I sat down on the sofa amid the piles of folded clothes to lean back and cross my legs. “Did you all do videos, or just her?”
“We all did—Marissa’s husband did it during her first pregnancy because she denied the epidural and he wanted to remind her to take it next time. But then, next time came, and she didn’t make it to the hospital. The same thing happened with Tracy’s second baby. Marissa’s on number three now, and Tracy, Hailey and I gave birth in the same month. So, it kind of turned into a roadshow, since H and I were the only ones to deliver in the hospital.”
Rambling slightly as she sauntered to the entertainment center at the back of the living room, Kelly flicked through the DVD sleeves before pausing to glance back at me. “It’s not easy to watch. Hailey was having a terrible time.”
“I want to watch it.” Conviction branded my heart, and Kelly shrugged again before picking up one of the sleeves to pop it open.
“If you say so.” Turning on the television, she navigated to the DVD player as I leaned forward in my seat, clenching my thighs together to cradle Antonya in my lap. Her small, fast heartbeat reverberated up my spine, and her entire body from shoulders to hips could fit under my palm. “I’m gonna go put this away.”
Filling the basket on the coffee table with folded cl
othes, Kelly hoisted it onto her hip to make her way towards the stairs, but my eyes were glued to the television as it glowed bright blue.
“—kay! Okay! The recorder is on, smile, H!” The cheerful, strained, feminine voice that echoed from the speakers sent stiffness down my spine, and Hailey’s furious, tear-stained face flashed on the screen. Two nurses held her up on either side while she walked, and her expression twisted in pain as she gnashed her tightly clenched teeth.
“Get that fucking thing out of my fa-a-a-ah! Fa- f- fuck!” Crumpling like wet paper, Hailey’s high-pitched scream rattled my bones, and the blood drained from my cheeks even as hers glowed a purplish-red. “Oh my God! Oh my God—Oh my God!”
“It’s okay, it’s okay, H. You’re almost there. Only one more centimeter.” The camera lens flew to a man that took the nurse’s place supporting Hailey’s left side, but she pushed him away roughly with a harsh grunt.
“It’s not okay! I hate you! Get out, Mark!” Hailey started sobbing uncontrollably, and this man, Mark, slipped back under her arm without any hesitation. Sweat dripped in torrents from every part of her body, and his side was soaked almost immediately. My heart twisted painfully, and I ground my teeth hard as I rubbed Antonya’s belly subconsciously. “Fuck- fuck- Ah- ah-h! Fuck!”
Hailey limped slowly around in a circle, stopping every other step as a contraction ripped through her. Agony seared my chest, and I couldn’t breathe as I watched her nearly fall to her knees.
That was what this was—agony for her to go through, and agony for me that I wasn’t there.
“Get her out of me! Please! It hurts so bad!” Goosebumps washed my skin as ice froze my veins, and Hailey’s whimpering, wretched cries came in desperate gasps.
“Just a little more, H. See, here comes the doctor, now.” The video swung to the door as a white-clad, older woman and a nurse came striding confidently into the room. “She’s gonna check, and it’ll all be over before you know it.”
Clearly, the doctor knew what she was doing as the one nurse replaced the other to hold Hailey up with Mark, and she crouched down as she slipped a glove over her hand. Anxiety and anticipation swirled in my gut, and I leaned forward with wide eyes to watch her nod firmly.
“You’re fully dilated, Hailey. Are you ready to push?” The question only pulled a yowling ‘no’ from Hailey as she doubled over, and the doctor ungloved her hand with a sympathetic look. “I’ll be back in a couple minutes, then.”
But that couple of minutes turned into an hour of screaming, of pain, until Hailey finally braced herself on the bed. Her sister cheered her on, and Mark sat on the bed to hold her shoulders as a nurse sat on a sheet of plastic on the floor. Harsh, shallow breaths pulsed from the television speakers, and the camera wobbled violently.
“I can see her head—push, Hailey. Push hard.” Hailey screamed a blood-curdling sound, and the camera jostled until I had a perfect view between her violently trembling thighs. Slick with blood and fluids, Antonya’s head of sparse, black hairs emerged, and my heart nearly stopped beating entirely as her body slipped from its cradle. Her chest inflated in a gasp, and her mouth opened wide in a wail that could shatter glass.
For just a second, Antonya disappeared from the camera’s view as the nurse pulled her back to avoid being crushed by Hailey’s body as she crumpled onto the plastic. Blood seeped from her to coat her legs and gown, but her groans and grunts of exhaustion were dampened by the newborn shrieking just beyond my view.
“Here she is, H, you did it. It’s over.” Two nurses and Mark helped Hailey onto the bed, and Antonya was set on her chest face down. Both mother and child relaxed instantly, and this woman that had just done this extraordinary thing passed out just as quickly.
“Are you gonna stay, Mark?” The feminine voice behind the camera spoke up as Mark rubbed his hands down his drenched shirt, and he shook his head wildly.
“Hell no—do you know how mad Kaitlyn was when I asked her if this was okay? She thought I cheated on her with my boss. No, I promised to be here to help Hailey get through the birth, but now I have to go grovel for Kaitlyn’s forgiveness.”
“I hope things won’t be awkward between you two.” Grimacing at that, Mark shook his head wildly as he flapped his t-shirt absently and swiped back his sweat-dampened hair.
“There was no one else she could ask, and Kaitlyn knows that. Besides, I’ve known Hailey since she was 15—I’m the one that hired her in the first place. I’m not going to cheat on my wife, and if I did, it wouldn’t be with someone I saw in a My Little Pony bathing suit top.”
Laughter was cut off when the video went into a blue screen, and I inhaled a harsh, rattling breath into lungs that refused to inflate. Turning my gaze to the baby in my lap, I blinked hard to rid myself of the burning behind my eyes.
