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“If you’re engaged, there should be a ring.”
“That will come when the time is right. Promises were made three years ago but with these types of events, timing is everything. Officially announcing the engagement too early would be a mistake.” She folds her hands neatly on her lap and glances at me again. “I don’t mind that he’s stalling a little, or even that he’s sowing his oats. It means that once we’re married, he’ll have gotten it out of his system.”
“Well, I hate to break it to you, but I don’t think what he and I have will be ending any time soon.”
She puts on a wry smile. “Poor thing. He’s really got you fooled, doesn’t he?”
“Not at all. I see him for exactly who he is.”
“I doubt that very much. He has to marry me. If he doesn’t, his family will lose all support from the government. My father’s the Prime Minister, and if he’s not happy, he’ll have the people vote them out of power.” She turns back to stare at Henry again.
When I look at him, I see a look of panic in his eyes, not the confidence that I’m needing to see right now.
“Do you really want to blackmail someone into marrying you?” I ask.
“It’s not blackmail. It’s reality, and Henry’s always known what his duty was.”
“And you’ll really be happy having a husband marry you out of a sense of duty rather than love?” I ask.
“Oh, he’ll love me. We already know we’re extremely compatible in the bedroom. We share the same upbringing, the same friends, the same values. The affection will grow quickly from there.” She turns back to me and gives me a hard look, even though she’s still smiling.
I swallow the words that sit on the tip of my tongue. I’m not going to lash out at her. I’m not going to yell or scowl or give her any hint that what she’s just said can affect me. With a woman like her, any sign of weakness means you lose. “If that’s what you really want, I wish you good luck.”
“I don’t need luck,” she says. “I’ve already won.”
With that she gets up and strolls to the front of the church. The rehearsal has just ended without me noticing, and the bridal party is standing around chatting. When she gets there, some of the bridesmaids squeal with delight as they give each other phony air kisses. When she gets to Henry, she reaches up on her tiptoes and tries to kiss him on the lips, but he turns his face at the last second, offering her his cheek instead. Without missing a beat, she wraps one hand on his forearm and strikes up a conversation.
I sit, silently watching, looking for any sign that she’s right about the future. One thing’s for sure, I don’t fit in here and I don’t know if I ever will.
***
I don’t have a chance to get Henry alone for the rest of the evening. He’s whisked off with the bridal party for photos, riding with the limo while I follow in a black SUV with Gabriel and Johan. Neither of them says anything to me the entire ride to the restaurant for the dinner. It’s like they know I’m done but they don’t want to say anything.
Henry and I sit next to each other at dinner and he holds my hand under the table the entire time. We can’t really talk, but he does whisper in
my ear that whatever Bianca said to me, I should ignore it because he will always love me. I know this should make me feel better, but somehow, there’s a distance between us that has grown from being here among his people and I’m not sure what it will take to get back to being us. Or if we can even do that.
After dinner, he’s expected to go back to Edwin’s manor for the night. He walks me to the SUV and then pulls me in for a long hug before I get in. I inhale the scent of his cologne, and suddenly start to feel my fears calm.
Pressing his forehead to mine, he says, “You okay?”
“Yes, fine,” I say, giving him my most confident smile.
“Liar,” he says, leaning in to kiss me. “But I love that you’re trying hard to keep a brave face.”
“I have a feeling I’ll need it if we’re going to make this work.”
He pulls back and gives me a hard look. “What do you mean, ‘if?’ We’re going to be married, Addison. You do believe it, don’t you?”
“Yes,” I say nodding. “I’m just feeling a little on edge. It’s a lot to get used to.”
“I know. And I’m sorry I have to go tonight. If I had my way, I’d sneak you back to the lodge so we could spend the entire night making love in front of the fire again.”
“Mmm. That sounds perfect.”
“How about this? We get through the wedding, then tomorrow night, we’ll go back up there until Christmas Eve?”
“Okay.”
