AllFreeNovel
Share Us
My friend gave me a hug. “I totally get it. On your way out, you should make a pit stop in the dining room. The caterers set up a fantastic dessert buffet in there.”
“I’ll check it out.”
“Just so you know, I plan to talk you out of giving up on acting,” Vee said, “but that’s a conversation for tomorrow. For now, go treat yourself.”
After we said good night, I took his advice and stopped off in the dining room. The buffet table was brimming with gorgeous, decadent treats, and I got excited when I spotted my very favorite dessert. I picked up a plate that held a thick slice of strawberry cheesecake, but then I hesitated.
It wasn’t news to me that I had a difficult relationship with food. I’d been bullied mercilessly for being chubby as a kid, and because I was clearly gay, and for being so poor that our church gave us care packages of food and used clothing. It wasn’t like any of the families in that hick town were well-off. They just did marginally better than mine, but that was enough for the other kids to look down on me.
I was powerless to do anything about most of that, but in my sophomore year of high school, I decided to take control of my body. That was when the diets started. It was also when I made the decision to pursue an acting career. It was going to be the ticket to a better life, not just for me, but for my parents.
But I’d failed. God, how I’d failed.
I put down the plate with that delicious-looking cheesecake. I didn’t deserve it. Then I straightened my posture and left the dining room, carefully avoiding the party by cutting through both buildings on the way back to my room.
When I’d accepted my friend Beck’s offer to stay at Seahorse Ranch, he’d given me a choice of accommodations. I’d opted to convert a disused office into a studio apartment, because it gave me more privacy than opting to stay in one of the guest rooms. It was at the back of the less busy of the two main buildings, down a hallway that was for staff only. It was usually pretty quiet, but that night the party could be heard throughout the property.
My cat glanced at me as I stepped through the door, and I said, “Hi, beautiful,” as I ran a hand over her long, gray fur. As was often the case, she was curled up in the very center of my bed.
After carefully hanging up my suit and button-down shirt, I changed back into what I’d been wearing before giving in to the ridiculous idea of a New Year’s kiss with Lorenzo. My white tank top was designer, the gray and white striped pajama pants were silk, and the oversized gray cardigan was cashmere. When it came to my clothes, I knew I totally overcompensated for growing up with ragged hand-me-downs.
The makeshift apartment didn’t have a kitchen, but there was a mini fridge and a shelving unit that acted as a pantry in the back corner, beside the sliding glass door that opened onto a small patio. I microwaved a mug of water and was just about to drop in a tea bag when a knock made me flinch.
Even though I really didn’t want company, I crossed the room and opened the door a crack to see who was there. Then I flung it open.
Lorenzo was carrying a cardboard box, and when he smiled at me, my heart stumbled. “Hi,” he said. “Can I come in?”
“Yeah, of course.” As he swept into the room, I stepped back and absently reached up to fix my hair. It was a bad habit, that self-conscious preening, and I stuffed my hands in my pockets to make myself stop as I murmured, “About earlier. I’m sorry. I know that New Year’s kiss was weird and awkward, and—”
He turned to me and said, “You thought it was weird and awkward?”
“Well, no. But you obviously did.”
“It just caught me off guard, especially since I wasn’t expecting to see you at the party. You’d told me you were planning to give it a skip.”
“Yeah, I was going to go to bed early. But then—” I really wanted to kiss you. “—I decided I didn’t want to ring in the new year by myself.” I shifted my weight from one foot to the other as he sat down on my white couch and started unpacking the box. “What, um, what are you doing here?” Ugh, I was being such a dork.
“Vee just told me you’re planning to give up acting.”
“You already knew that. I told you four months ago.”
“But now it sounds like you’re actually going through with it.”
“Yeah, just like I said I would if I didn’t land a job by the end of the year.”
