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“I know, but Opal, he never gets up and walks out to speak on the phone, even when it’s about a case. He’ll be discreet, but once he’s home for the night, unless he’s on call, he’s at my side. At the very least, if his hands aren’t on me, his eyes are. And when I say he came home late the other day, I mean he was supposed to get Jaydon from Mom and Dad’s on his way home from work at four, and Mom told me he didn’t arrive until after five.”
“I’m sure he’s just got something going on with a case, Liv.”
I glance behind me to make sure Ryan’s not home yet and listening. Not only is he the love of my sister’s life, but he’s also really good friends with Jay, and the last thing I need is him getting in the middle of this. “You don’t understand. Jay turned me down last night.” Her head rears back, and I nod. “Yup. In all the years we’ve been together, the only time he ever turned me down was the very first night he came to my apartment the day I met him. And the only reason he did is because he said he didn’t have the time and wanted to make sure I knew I was a priority, not just a quick fuck.” Which is one of the reasons I fell for him so hard and so fast.
“Talk to him. If you’re really that worried, which I don’t think you need to be, then you need to talk to him. If you don’t, he’s going to know something’s wrong with you, and he’ll be on your ass until you tell him anyway.”
She’s right. Part of what makes him such a good detective is his ability to read people. But me in particular… he knows me almost better than I know myself. Which is why he’s been asking me if everything is okay the past couple of days, even though I thought I was hiding my fears well enough that he wouldn’t notice something was wrong.
I need to talk to him, but I’m so afraid of what he’s going to tell me. I love him with all that I am and have already had to live without him once. I wouldn’t survive if I lost him again. I need to find out what I did and then fix whatever is wrong, because it has to be something I messed up. “Will you keep Jaydon for a little bit?”
“Yeah, no problem. I can bring him home later if you want. Just let me know.”
The problem is that I don’t know, but right now I need to be alone so I can think. “Awesome, thanks.”
After saying goodbye to her and my baby, I go to my car and dial my husband’s number, only to have my call go to voicemail. That never happens. Ever. I honestly can’t remember a time he didn’t answer when I called. “Oh, God,” I say to the dial tone and hang up with trembling fingers and dreadful thoughts.
I’m realistic enough to know that relationships have problems, and was fully expecting our marriage to have ups and downs, I just never thought that Jay being unfaithful would be something I’d ever have to worry about. I try to be the woman he fell in love with and treat him like the amazing man he is, but having a toddler takes time and energy away from Jay that used to be for him. And since Jaydon was born my body doesn’t look the same, while Jay continues to get hotter as each day passes.
Not knowing what to do with myself because I’m filled with fear that he’s stepping out on me, I point my car in the direction of our house and stop at the coffee shop that has the best brownies in the world on the way.
Because when in doubt, chocolate always helps.
I go inside and purchase two brownies, and then head back to my car, but something shiny catches my eye. There’s a penny several feet away, and the sun is shining, so I take it as an omen that maybe the day will get better, and once I talk to him, he’ll reassure me that we’re still okay. A lucky penny is how we met and every time I see one, I feel a little flutter in my chest. Smiling, I walk the few feet and am about to bend down when I hear the unmistakable sound of my husband’s deep voice around the corner.
“—my wife doesn’t find out.”
“No, I won’t say anything,” a female replies.
I don’t move, paralyzed by fear and terror and heartache.
“Been with her a long time, and I’ve never done anything like this, it never even crossed my mind, but then I saw you and thought it’d be worth it to see if you were interested.”
She giggles and it makes me want to puke. “You know I’m interested. I’ve wanted to do something like this for a long time, so even though I’m a little nervous, I’m really excited.”
“Me, too.”
“What are you going to tell her?”
I hear him sigh. “Dunno, I’ll make up some shit about a case or something. The last thing I want to do is hurt her or make her suspicious, so she cannot find out.”
“She won’t. You’re not the only man I’ve done this with before, and never once have I been caught.”
“Well then, let’s not ruin that streak with us.” His voice is fucking flirty, and the homewrecker giggles again. I want to run around the side of the building and tackle a bitch and rip her eyes out, but I don’t because I can’t move. And even if I could, I’d probably collapse to the ground just like my world is crumbling around me.
“I’ve gotta go. Meet you at the hotel tomorrow?”
Um… what?
“Yeah, same one. Nine.”
Oh God. I’ve heard enough. More than enough. More than I’ve ever wanted to hear in my entire life.
My body moves sheerly out of self-preservation, and I turn and run back to my car and tear out of the lot to go home. I don’t allow myself to even think about what I just heard. I can’t, or I’ll fall apart right now. Not now. Not yet. I need to think, I have to be sure… positive.
Yanking the brownie out of its wrapper, I spill chocolate all over my jeans and my seat, but I don’t give a shit as I keep shoving it in my mouth so I don’t scream. As I’m sitting at a stoplight anxious to be home, I realize that if Jaydon is at Opal’s for no reason, Jay will find that suspicious, and I don’t want to clue him in that I know anything right now. I need time to think and figure things out, and to be completely honest, to have one more night together before everything falls apart.
One more night of us cuddling on the couch while he plays with my hair. The last time of him holding me while I sleep. Another morning waking up to his lips caressing my own and his strong hands worshipping my body.
