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I chuckle and kiss the top of her head.
As I lie with her wrapped in my arms, my mind wanders to places it shouldn’t. Three thoughts keep going over and over in my head.
Was it like this for her when she was with Theo all those years ago?
Was it like this for him?
And how in the fuck could I have ever lived with myself after forcing myself on this beautiful woman?
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
Jules
I FEEL LIKE I’M FLOATING. Weightless in black space. I don’t feel my hands, legs, face, or any other part of my body. It’s like they aren’t there. I exist, but I don’t exist. I try to think and there are no thoughts in my head. No images, no emotions, no memories. Nothing. I bring my hand to my face and see nothing. I try to touch my arm and feel nothing. I sniff and smell nothing. I listen and hear… a buzzing sound. When I turn to find the source of the noise, my head or eyes or whatever I am, goes in slow motion. Too slow for the movement I tried to make.
Suddenly, things change. The black space becomes blindingly white. So bright I’m forced to close my eyes. I no longer feel weightless, but weighted down, like my veins are filled with dense mercury. Millions of memories flash in my head all at once. They move from one to the other so fast that I can’t distinguish them. Emotions slam into me. Happiness, love, joy, pain, loss, fear, heartache, anxiety, horror, sadness, helplessness. They all filter through over and over again until my mind is a jumbled mess and my head feels like it’s going to explode.
When I open my eyes again, the bright light is gone. I look around, and immediately recognize my surroundings. I’m in the apartment my parents rented for me right after I graduated high school. It was a small one-bedroom rent-by-the-month apartment. I had to beg my parents to let me rent it. They thought it was pointless since I was leaving the next year for college. After I explained my reasoning for wanting a trial period of living on my own while still being close to them, they reluctantly gave in.
The apartment is just how I remember it. Cream-colored leather couch with mahogany end tables, a medium-sized television sitting on a mahogany TV stand with the stereo system beside it, along with my collection of DVDs and CDs. Pictures of my family sit on some of the shelves while more hang on the walls. I wasn’t there long, but I remember being so happy to have my own place that I had unpacked and was finished decorating within that first week.
I spin around when something catches my attention. I see myself walk out of the hallway carrying a suitcase. I set the suitcase down beside the couch and move to the pictures sitting on the shelf.
“Hello?” I call hesitantly, my voice sounding strange as it echoes throughout the room.
My other self doesn’t acknowledge me as she grabs the pictures, wraps them in bubble wrap, and places them inside a box. I walk further into the room until I’m standing beside her. When I reach out to touch her, I’m shocked as my fingers move through her arm. I look down at my hand and flex my fingers. I can see the beige carpet through them.
I glance back at the me still packing picture frames and see her smiling. It amazes me how happy and beautiful she looks as she hums a tune that sounds familiar. I listen carefully and recognize it as “It Feels Like the First Time” by Foreigner.
Once all the pictures are packed away, she grabs the box and carries it to the small dining room table, where she tapes it closed.
The doorbell rings and we both look at the door. I turn back to her and see her smile has grown to encompass her whole face. Something niggles in the back of my head, and I want to reach out and grab her as she makes her way to the door. Something isn’t right. Whatever’s on the other side of that door is evil.
“Jules!” I scream. “NOOO!”
She doesn’t hear me. As she passes by me, I try to grab her arm, but again, my hand slides through her. Time seems to slow down as she reaches the door. I watch tensely as she flips the dead bolt. Her smile is still in place she grabs the doorknob and twists. Fear and a sick feeling drop in my stomach when she pulls the door open and a shadow falls over her.
“You’re early,” she says quietly, her eyes lighting up even more.
From where I’m standing, the door blocks my view of who is on the other side, but I know something is terribly wrong when the smile slides from her face and fear replaces it.
She takes a step back, her voice trembling when she whispers, “Wh-what are you doing here?”
The shadow moves closer, and I hold my breath, waiting to see who it is. Terror freezes my ethereal form when it’s not a person who appears, or rather, not a person in solid form. It’s a silhouette, a darkness so great that it turns the air frigid and casts its shadow over everything in the room. The same silhouette that’s haunted my dreams.
It kicks the door closed then stalks closer to Jules, or the me that I’m watching, while she backs up until she hits the couch
“I’ve come to claim what’s mine,” growls the silhouette. The voice is eerie and malevolent, sending shivers down my spine. “You both made a very bad mistake, Jules. He can’t have you.”
Shock, fear, and pride fill me when Jules straightens her spine and says defiantly, “I’m already his, so fuck you. I lov
e him. I will only ever love him. You need to give this infatuation up before you get hurt.” She lifts her arm to point to the door, and I can see the tremble she’s trying to hide. “I want you to leave! Now!”
Before she has the last word out, he’s on her and has a hand wrapped around her throat. A scream leaves my lips at his fast movement, but it’s quickly cut short. A tightness grips my neck, and I can’t draw in air. Pain like I’ve never felt before has me clawing at my throat. Stars prick my eyes, and I blink several times to try and clear my vision. The silhouette leans Jules over the back of the sofa, and I realize it’s her pain I’m feeling when his hand tightens around her neck at the same time it tightens around mine.
His voice is pure evil when he speaks next, and it sounds as if he’s actually whispering it in my ear.
“Oh, I’m leaving, but you’re coming with me… after I’ve had my turn.”
