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He sighed. It came out of him in a stream of irritation. “I’m going to open a kindy. Polly and I are developing a property.”
He didn’t smile, but she did. “That’s wonderful.” It was sudden and surprising and perfect for him. But it wasn’t forgiveness.
“There’s a long way to go, but I’m not going to be nannying for families anymore.”
“I don’t want you to be our nanny.” Please look at me, please, Reece. “Do you still want a family of your own?”
He turned his head. She almost recoiled. He had old world sorrow in his eyes, and she’d put it there. But he had Charlie’s fighter-spirit in him too.
“I have a family of my own. That’s them inside laughing, fighting, hating each other, enjoying each other. You could’ve been part of my family, you and Mia, but I wasn’t good enough for you.”
His eyes were dark, dark, dark. His words were painful to hear. “You’re the only man I’ve ever loved, Reece. There was my father and he didn’t deserve it, there was Barrett and he’s more like a brother, and there is you. And when you got out of the car and said my name just then you nearly stopped my heart. I have missed you like I lost my sense and reason.”
He groaned and looked away. “What do you want from me, Audrey?”
“I’m scared to say because you would give me anything.”
He didn’t look at her. He closed his eyes. “Fuck my life. I would.”
She wanted badly to touch him, but it might send him away and if he rejected her she’d need to camp on these steps till she was strong enough to move again. “And that might not be good enough for you.”
He turned to her again; this time his whole torso. He put all his frustration in her hands. “You need to tell me why you’re here. Are you sick again?”
“No, although I’m desperately tired.” He would see that. He would see every one of her sins and lies, fears and hopes, and he would be allowed to walk away from them.
“You’ve put on weight.”
No one else had noticed. “I’m going to put on a lot more.” There was no easy way to tell him. She’d done nothing but stall. She was failing in the most important presentation of her life.
“You are so beautiful. I have not been the same without you. If this is an apology before you move on, rip it quick.”
“I’m pregnant.”
It hit him like hostility. He turned his body away. “I can’t help you with that.” He thought it was Barrett’s and it devastated him.
“It’s yours, Reece. Ours.”
His eyes came back and searched hers. “But you weren’t, and we...”
“It’s freakish. Or I thought that at first, but now I know how fortunate it was. It’s miraculous.”
“Pregnant with my baby?” His voice was thick with disbelief, but she could see in his face he’d already accepted it, because he’d dreamed it.
“The twins run in Charlie’s family, don’t they?”
He frowned at the tangent. “Yeah.” And then it wasn’t tangential to him. “Holy fuck, Audrey.”
She nodded. He reached for her. “You’re pregnant with my twins.” Not a question, a declaration.
She moved to hold him off. “You didn’t want this right now and you’re building a new life and—”
“You’re going to try telling me you’ll cut some deal like you have with the furniture removalist. There is no fucking way.”
She couldn’t help but smile. “You can be as involved as you want.”
“I’m their father. I’ll be in their puke, and their spit, and their blood, and their poop to my eyeballs.”
She was grinning like a circus clown. “If that’s what you want
