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Prologue
Tamilyn
I can’t breathe. My body is going through all the motions for breathing to take place, but it’s like nothing is happening. Things weren’t supposed to go this way, but here I am staring straight ahead, afraid to make eye contact with him. If I move my head in any sudden direction, eye contact is inevitable. The tears pooled in my eyes are so thick I doubt I could even make his features out. Maybe I wouldn’t be able to see the hurtful look on his face. No doubt it’s the mirror image of my own. All I know is everything was fine earlier. I had everything figured out and then, like a blow to the gut, it vanished. My head drops even with my knees and the tears I’ve been holding back finally fall.
Chapter 1
Ruston
Standing against a tree in one of the local parks, I stare at the luscious locks of brown hair cascading down her back in a ponytail, and her long, lean legs in those running shorts. Tamilyn tosses her head back, laughing at something Jess said. Jess has tried to interest me several times, but all we’ve shared are a few kisses. Kisses that mean nothing because all I want is the girl sitting across from her. She and Tamilyn have never been great friends, and they rarely talk. They just happened to hang out with part of the same crowd in high school. All I want is Tamilyn. She doesn’t even know what she does to me. I stood beside her ever since we were making mud pies in her backyard but all she’s ever seen me as is her best friend. I’d rather have that than nothing at all, but I wish she would open her eyes and see me. I would do anything in this world for her. Instead, I’m just the hopeless guy in love with his childhood friend.
“Oh, hey, Ruston,” Jess purrs. She’s never taken the hint. I’ve tried to be subtle because I don’t want Tamilyn knowing the mistake I made.
“Hey, Jess,” I mutter before drawing in a deep breath. “Hey, Tam, what’s up?”
Tamilyn turns to face me, her smile covering her whole face. I love it. “Hey, Rus.”
She wraps her arms around my neck and I manage to breathe in just enough of her without sending her any kind of bad vibe. Having her in my arms is the best part of my day.
“I’ll catch you guys later. I need to do some laundry,” Jess announces, as if we really needed to know that.
“Bye, Jess,” Tamilyn calls out. I just nod in her direction. The sooner Jess is gone, the quicker I get attention from Tam.
Jess purposefully shakes her ass, probably hoping my jaw will drop and I’ll want her, but I turn away from her.
“You’re off work today, right?” I pull away from the embrace. Mom has been on my case for almost a week now, wondering why Tamilyn hasn’t been over for dinner. In my mom’s eyes, Tamilyn and I are as together as they come. She probably thinks we’re sleeping together but the last time we slept in the same vicinity, we were fully clothed.
“I am. Why, what’s up?” She raises her eyebrow as I pull her hand into mine.
“Just asking. Mom wants to know if we want to come by for dinner tonight.”
“Yeah, I have no plans. Jess wanted to go out, but I’m not feeling it tonight. I’d much rather spend the evening with your family.”
Tamilyn cracks me up sometimes. She loves the nightlife as much as the typical twenty-two-year-old, but she also loves just staying indoors and not doing a damn thing. That’s what I love so much about her.
“I’ll text her and let her know. She’s going to be so excited.”
“My parents are still out in the Bahamas somewhere having a blast, so it’s not like I have much of anything to do and your mom is one of the best cooks I know. Thanks to her, I don’t have to eat fast food tonight. She’s my savior.”
I roll my eyes. Tamilyn is such a damn character sometimes. She slaps my arm and I pretend to wince in pain. She truly hits like a girl but I never admit that to her because then she may actually try to hit me harder.
“We can ride together if you want.” I offer with my fingers and toes both crossed. Time with her is the highlight of my life.
“Sure. I’m actually about to head back to my apartment. I’m all sweaty and I don’t want to stink at dinner.”
I’m sleazy for showing up at the park where she does her afternoon run. I know I could have texted her but I don’t take the easy way out of anything.
I lead her back to my gray Chevy truck that sits parked at the curb, then open the door for her like usual. I do all these kind, gentlemanly gestures hoping that she’ll realize just how perfect I am for her. She grins and says thank you. I sigh as I walk over to my side of the truck. The radio is blaring my favorite rock station and I hurry to turn it down. She stops me from turning it down too low.
“I like this song.” She grins as I slowly pull away from the curb. Her apartment is only about a block and a half from the park, so in a matter of a few seconds we are sitting outside her home. The song is still on and she insists we stay put until it’s over.
When she sings along, I focus on her alone. She’s a karaoke singing, music loving girl. I know, I’m a total fucking creeper. I’ve got to be the creepiest best friend in the world. Relief washes over me as the song ends. With Tamilyn’s approval, I finally turn the truck off and she grabs her house key. I follow behind her and make myself at home on her couch. She hasn’t told me to make myself at home in ages. It’s just an understood thing between us.
The sound of the shower turning on makes my dick hard. Pathetic, I know, but the thought of her being naked just a few feet from me drives me insane. This is becoming torture, but misery loves company and I’d rather be tortured than not have her in my life at all. The pain in my dick increases the longer I hear the shower. I need
to think of anything but her. My gaze roams her quaint apartment, looking for anything to kill the hard-on that’s taken over. Her book shelf sticks out but it doesn’t help that she has those damn Fifty Shades of Grey books up there.
Focus, Ruston, focus. Finally, I see a picture of her grandma, and that kills every fantasy my dick was harboring. Thank God. I hear the shower turn off.
Tamilyn’s hum fills the small apartment and I glance toward her bedroom door. It’s open and I begin sweating when I see her walk by in nothing but a soft pink towel. I glance back at the picture of her grandma. Sometimes I wonder if she realizes what she’s doing when she doesn’t shut the door. She knows I’m a guy and she’s got to know how guys think and what they think with. We don’t always use our damn brains.
Minutes pass as if they were hours as I wait for her to get ready. She finally emerges from her bedroom wearing a t-shirt and a pair of jeans. She runs her fingers through her hair before stepping back into the bathroom. When she emerges, I raise my eyebrow. “Ready?”
“Yeah, sorry. I had to put my eyeliner on.”
“You know you don’t need all that shit,” I remind her.
“Yeah, I know, but I like it so shut it.”
“Yes, ma’am.” It’s her turn to roll her eyes and she does. Boy, does she ever.
