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“Maybe it’s because of what’s been going on with his friend?”
“Friend?”
“This Jordan guy. Like, he totally vanished from the face of the earth two years ago and Hawk has traveled to Mexico based on rumors that he went there.”
You kidding me? I stop checking the internet for six days and I miss this? In Mexico. Probably drinking tequila with some chick in a pool.
Damn.
***
“See you in an hour, babe,” Hawk says, and I disconnect the call, lying back on my bed.
I put down my phone and stare at the far wall of my bedroom. I should be happy he’s back from Mexico and calling me to meet up. We have fun together, if nothing else, and my body is already tingling when I think of him. Of how he makes me feel.
How he makes me come.
But God, I wish I had a real boyfriend sometimes. Someone I can share real stuff with. Someone I can call in the middle of the night to talk about my fears, and hopes, someone who will cuddle me and make me hot chocolate when I feel blue.
“What you need,” Dorothy says, wandering into my room, “is new lingerie. Tall, Blond and Sexy will appreciate it.” She sinks down on the bed beside me. “I overheard your call. That a problem? “
“Nope. No problem.”
“Then why the long face?”
“You know why.”
Dorothy’s expression softens. “Is that about what the doc told you?”
I nod and put my socked feet on the wall.
“It’s going to be fine, sweetie,” she says.
And I don’t see how. “You’re right.”
“Besides, you said Hawk isn’t the guy you want to spend your life with.”
I said that.
She copies my pose—lying on her back, putting her socked feet on the wall. Her socks have tiny dinosaurs on them. “He’s a playboy millionaire and not interested in relationships. You want a guy who will understand you, and think long-term with you.”
But all this doesn’t change what the doc said and how my life will never be the same. “I hate this.”
“There are options in life, Laylay. Don’t overthink this. And look at it on the bright side. No need to take the pill anymore!”
“Yay me,” I mumble, and my eyes burn.
“Oh baby girl.” Dorothy turns and throws an arm over me. Her dark eyes are inches from mine. “Don’t let this get you down. We will go and see more specialists, okay? And I was kidding about the pill. I mean, use protection, right? Always.”
I nod again, because she’s right. I’m just still in shock. “Hawk and I, we’re exclusive. At least, he says we are.”
“Okay then. Chin up. I love you, girl.”
“Love you, too.” I sniffle. “Marry me, Dodo? You’re the best.”
She snorts. “Go and have hot sex with your man. Hot sex is like going to the spa. It will make you feel better.”
God, yeah. Sadly, though, I doubt it will be enough… Maybe it’s me, maybe I’m changing. I’m over Chance, have been for a while, I know I’m not frigid in bed, I know I love sex… and I want more. More from a guy than that.
