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That said, I turn away. I have nothing left to say.
I walk down the sidewalk towards the schoolyard where I left my chopper. After rounding the corner, I break into a jog.
My chest still hurts, but it’s not so heavy anymore. I came after Aster like Giselle told me to. I’ve finally told her everything I’ve always wanted to say. I have no regrets.
The only sad thing? Now, I guess we’re really over.
Chapter Twenty-One ~ Second Chance
Aster
I can’t believe my marriage is really over.
I wallow in frustration as I sit on the front porch of Peggy’s house. My hands grip my hair. My shoulders droop like they’re carrying the weight of the world.
I know I was the one who left. The divorce was my idea. But Mason came after me. He loves me.
And now he’s gone. The man who has loved me all this time is gone. And I’ve never felt more alone.
I hug my knees to my chest and wrap my arms around them. I want to cry. I do. But the tears just won’t come. Probably they hate me, too, because I’ve been a fool. I’m the world’s biggest fool.
“Aster?” I hear Peggy’s voice a moment after I hear the door behind me creak.
I glance over my shoulder and force a smile. “Hey. Good morning.”
“Good morning,” she returns my greeting in a surprised tone. Then she sits beside me with a cup of coffee in hand. “You know it’s barely morning, right?”
I know that. The sun is just starting to come out, just starting to shed its blanket over the trees.
“I was jogging,” I say.
I tried to sleep after talking to Mason. I couldn’t. I just lay in bed for hours. So in the end, I decided to go jogging like I used to. Alone. The dogs stayed behind this time because I don’t trust myself to watch them when my mind is a mess.
“And you do know that my house isn’t in your neighborhood, right?” Peggy tells me. “In fact, it’s across town.”
I shrug. “I’ve been jogging for a long time, I guess. Before I knew it, I was here.”
That’s partly true. I was jogging aimlessly, wandering all over town, and then I realized I was closer to Peggy’s house than I was to mine. And I needed someone to talk to, so I came over.
“Yeah, right.” Peggy sighs. “One more thing. You know that I’m still mad at you, right?”
I look at her with creased eyebrows. No, I didn’t know that.
“Oh, come on.” Peggy looks away. “You didn’t invite me to your wedding.”
“Because I didn’t know it was going to be my wedding,” I tell her. “And after the wedding, I called you to come to my reception but you didn’t.”
“I couldn’t just take off,” she says. “I had work.”
Of course she did.
She takes a sip of her coffee. “Also, you left me behind.”
I sigh. “Mason wanted me and my dad in DC. He didn’t give me any choice.”
“And you didn’t even say goodbye.”
“Because it happened so suddenly. I’d barely finished packing before the chopper arrived.”
“And you only called me once when you were in DC,” Peggy says.
I’m about to say I was busy, which is the best excuse I have. Instead, I let out another sigh.
“You’re right. You should still be mad at me.”
Peggy, too, sighs. “You know ‘sorry’ would be enough, right?”
I look at her. God, I’ve missed having a friend.
“Sorry,” I tell her. “I’m sorry I was such a bad friend. I’ll try to do better, I promise. And don’t worry. I’m not leaving you behind anymore.”
Peggy’s eyes narrow. “You’re not going back to DC?”
I shake my head.
“But Mason…”
“Mason and I are getting a divorce,” I tell her.
She gasps. “What?”
I exhale. “We never should have gotten married anyway.”
I tell her everything now – the planned fake marriage turned real, the time I spent in DC, the gala, the sex, the fight that had me running back home with my dad and my dogs, and finally, what happened last night. I tell her Mason caught me hugging Leander. I tell her everything Mason told me.
In the end, Peggy falls silent. And she rarely does. Then she shakes her head slowly.
“Wow. He loved you all this time and you never noticed?”
“No.”
That’s why I want to kick myself.
“I’m such a fool, aren’t I?”
“Yeah,” Peggy agrees. “The world’s biggest fool.”
Ouch. I already knew that, but it somehow stings more coming from her.
“But you’re going to do something about it, right?” Peggy asks me. “I mean, you’re not just going to let Mason go, right?”
“He’s already gone,” I tell her. “He’s said everything he came to say.”
“And what about you? Don’t you have anything more you want to say? Because the fact that you’re here talking to me tells me you do.”
I do, actually. I want to repeat some of the things I said because I feel Mason wasn’t really listening to me. And I want to say some other things, things he didn’t give me a chance to say or that I couldn’t say right after he told me everything he felt.
